FemaleAustraliaMember since 14 Jul 13Last online 7 years ago

HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI
I am Ultear the leader of the seven Kin Of purgatory!!!!!
I don't really write movella, I just read and review them!!
I am a proud one direction HATER!

  • Ultear!
    7 years agoReply
    I think this is a very good begining to a great book, I am excited to read more, I would suggest showing your characters appearnace rather then telling them. You build tension between characters flawlessly, and are certainly an author I'll be keeping an eye on.
    You Could Always Ask Cecile
    You Could Always...
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    Meet the Grants. They live in an ordinary home, and are an ordinary family with ordinary jobs and pastimes. Then meet Cecile. She's dead. But what happened to make her that way? I don't know. There's...
  • Ultear!
    7 years agoReply
    A greta idea, very thought out and original, but when you start dialouge you always start a new paragraph, example:
    ....huge smile stretched across her freckled face. "c'mon lily!! I'll throw a bucket of cold water on you!!".... this should be:
    ....Huge smile stretched across her freckled face.
    "C'mon lily!! I'll throw a bucket of cold water on you!!"....
    Also only ever use on "!" or "?", you only need one, I've seen some with an entire paragraph of exclamation points. I really like this, sorry I'm a perfectionist.
    19 years later~Hogwarts
    19 years later~Hog...
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    I'm Lily. Lily Luna Potter. My father, Harry Potter, defeated a dark wizard, Lord Voldemort. At Hogwarts, strange things are happening. Everyone is being attacked. Stunned, Full Body Bind curse. And me...
    Ultear!
    7 years ago
    Oh and you don't need to combine ? and !, just use one.
  • Ultear!

    mumbled "Mumbles?"

    7 years agoReply
    What is a mumble?
    RustyTheReclusiveRadiator
    Hey join my group Grimoire Heart, Ultear!
    Mirlotta
    7 years ago
    A mumble is just like a blog basically. You can post gifs/shout outs / ads for your work/ads for reviews.
    Anyway, a saw that you did reviews in your profile information, and was wondering if it would be too much trouble to review my book, 'You could always ask Cecile'?
    You Could Always Ask CecileMeet the Grants. They live in an ordinary home, and are an ordinary family with ordinary jobs and pastimes. Then meet Cecile. She's dead. But what happen...
    Ultear!
    7 years ago
    thank you now I understand, I will certainy review your book. :D
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