Frigid Heart

Leave me broken and beaten, cut and torn open in the arms of a lover who would've lassoed the moon if it would've made me smile. I had been given the most perfect man to love and enjoy, now remembering those protective arms will only bring the pain of a memory that scars my body more fiercely than the whip marks, deeper than the branding numbers on the back of my neck.
I will never forgive or forget what happened, you made me like this. I'll break your bones like dry twigs and leave you to fend on your own so you can feel what I have for the last fifteen years.

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Author's note

so long. I feel like its been a billion years since ive done anything on this site. This is a new side story to a comic currently being made featuring the odd human/cat like species called Moggies.

NO, they're not Nekos or anything remotely along those lines. they share the fact of the ears and tails. thats about it. Other then that, they're an extremely intelligent species with the instincts of both humans and animal. In this time, Moggies are seen as obvious threats, so naturally humans are on the war path for complete genocide. The few unlucky souls that aren't killed on sight are typically taken to labor camps.

1. Prologue

  

Life is a song, you walk its tempo; you change the rate with every step. Your dances are light and uncoordinated, perhaps a bit clumsy to some. Yet, when your song clashes with that of another's, a whole new dance is born.
Perhaps a rugged tango that leaves you breathless at the final steps and sways. Or maybe a jerky salsa, the feeling practically lifting you off the ground.

My first dance was slow, chests pressed together with hands clasped in a tender but protective embrace. The steady beats of our hearts kept the most beautiful of waltzes going.

"My Lotus" he purred, "You should be resting." I remember his touch, the way his arms curved around my waist to settle on the swell of my stomach.

"I'm perfectly capable of doing simple things, Fletcher." I answer, almost in a competitive manner my hands still gripping the dish.

His lips found my neck, tracing the small indents of the scar he had left. I often teased him for how crooked his canines came in. The small bite mark was out of pure affection gone feral, it did indeed bleed, but I guess this one didn't bother me as much as my others did.  Slowly straightening his posture I could feel his slender body lean flush against my back.

"You grow more beautiful everyday Lotus" he whispered, slowly bringing his head up to place his lips against my temple. "She will be strong, and beautiful like her mother."

There's nothing he could do that couldn't get me to smile. Setting the dish back into the bucket with a soft thud I turned to face him. I memorized the way his eyes would glitter in the morning rays of dawn. The way his scar turned into an extension of his happiness when he smiled. God's above or below, I was so in love.
Not even his sun kissed skin would hide the blooming blush that would spread across his cheeks. Being over twenty years of age, when I look at him like this; it feels like I'm a child all over again; holding hands with my crush for the first time.

My hands found his, gently pressing against my stomach. "How do you know it's not your heir, my dear? Perhaps he will be the one to take care of us when we're old and gray."

"A healthy baby is all I could ask for" he purred, shifting his weight to lean his forehead against my own.

My hands shifted, bringing them up to his cheeks. The kiss that followed was sweet, they seemed to grow sweeter with every passing day. I could get lost in his embrace. So tender, yet so protective.
A soft growl elicited from his throat, bringing me back to my senses. It wasn't threatening, or any sort of warning just a simple way to say 'it's time to rest.'

Curling up on the mess of animal skins I moved to my side with a soft exhale. As time passed, I found that performing the simplest of tasks were going much harder with the life growing inside of me.
Fletcher curled up against my back, his bare chest alone could provide enough heat for me. But with his constant pleas I agreed to sleep under the sheepskin comforter. His legs tangled with mine as he pulled closer, his lips ghosting my nape.

"Get plenty of good sleep, Lotus" he murmured, his fingers drawing small circles on my stomach as he began to doze off.

I couldn't help but lean back into his embrace, feeling safe in his strong arms as I fell asleep to the steady beat of his heart.

 

Like every good song or dance, it's always meant to end.

 

Even under the excessive amounts of blankets, I could feel the chill of the storm that brewed outside. However, something felt different. I couldn’t describe what I was feeling in my state of reality and dreams.

 

To this day there’s so many things I wish I had done differently.


 

If only I knew what I know now, the horrors and things of what is to become of the only things that mattered. I wish I would’ve told him how much I adored his honey smooth voice and rough hands. I adored the small gap that would become more and more visible as his smiles would grow. Or the way his laughs would echo along the walls of our small house.
But, above all....

I would’ve told him how much I loved him

If I could've prevented it all I would’ve done it in a heartbeat. I would trade anything to feel those strong hands and soft lips.

Our startled sounds were nearly drowned out by the storms unrelenting screams. Humans. Nasty creatures they were, scrounging for power at any chance they got  
About eight men dressed in heavy snow gear clouded the room, they were armed to the teeth in heavy artillery.

Did they really think we were that dangerous?

In an instant Fletcher's body casted over my own, his ears folded back as a snarl curled from his lips. From his usual giddy and outgoing nature you'd never see his teeth bared like this. All the sounds that fell from his lips came out in feral snarls and growls, the hairs of the back of his neck rising.
We both knew the intentions of humans, usually it's in our better judgement to run; we had already been doing it for twenty years. But this time was different, they had us cornered. We had no choice.

The room was deathly silent, it was a standoff, the wait of who would move first. It was all a blurr, the world seemed to be moving in slow motion.
It was one false move that led to Fletcher's attack, the way his body curved and flexed as he jumped from the bed with fangs bared. His agile body having the advantage in our small space. I was frozen to the bed, nails digging into the bed sheets. I didn't know what to do. I watched as he was apprehended, needing nearly the entire group to stop his struggling.

I should've ran.

The strong pungent smell of smoke burned my sinuses as I forced myself to look at our intruders.
It was an ugly man, his shrew like face disgusted me. Even had a smile like a rodent, fucking pests, nuisances. With one of his fat fingers he gestured towards my general direction. It was in that moment that my fingers finally found what they were searching for. Slowly my hand wrapped around the smooth surface of the knife kept in a crevasse of the bed. We'd been hearing an odd amount of nightly activity in our surrounding areas.

Subconsciously I managed to pull my feet out from under me. Standing with some trouble my hand shakily gripped the small weapon.  I wasn't even in control anymore, it was a new feeling, one made up of only impulse and instinct. I dove at the man, my bare feet tapping against the floor roughly as I gripped the blade tight between my shivering hands. It was absolutely pointless, I could feel the rough fingers tangle in my thick locks and jerking me backwards. The suddenness of it surprised me causing me to cry out, my ears flattening against my temple. After all my efforts all I seemed to have gotten to land was a deep cut on the fat man's arm whom seemed completely unfazed by it.

If my childhood friends saw me now they'd laugh at what I had become. Pregnancy was even more dangerous for our species for this reason, we were vulnerable. Now here we are, both myself and my partner bound and about to be put to death from sheer fear of a primitive species.

 

“alright boys, git em outside and let's have a bit a’ fun with this one” he gave a swift tug on the handful of my hair. Fletcher snarled and hissed under the men's weight, desperately trying to come to my aid. From there we were dragged from the comfort of the hearth, the warm blankets and carved rocking chair. All of it would be forgotten.

I was dropped in the snow, it's frigid teeth dug into the thin clothing that barely wrapped around my body. I didn't have much time to think about it as I felt the cold tip of a metal boot drive into the small of my back. I gritted my teeth, refusing to allow any sounds to escape my lips. I wasn't about to let those bastards receive the satisfaction they desired. My hands wrapped around my stomach, whispering soft things to the baby I knew I'd never be able to meet.

Fletcher's cries were more prominent, screaming profanities to the heavens.

 

“yeah, yeah, the whole speech about how your gunna’ kill us. That's real cute” the man took a puff from his cigar, blowing a cloud in his general direction. “well, if your so eager, why don't you protect this lil thing o’ yours.”

 

“Let me go and I'll show you exactly what I can do.” Fletcher snapped, throwing his body forward with whatever strength he could muster.

 

“go on and let em go, I got it” I flinched at the man's words, shifting myself in attempts to protest.

It wouldn't have made a difference anyways.

The last thing I remember seeing was a blur of brown and the flash of teeth as I watched the only man I ever cared about throw himself into the awaiting arms of death.

 

“Fletcher!” I managed to wail, as I watched him tackle the man to the ground. I could feel the tears welding in my eyes as they spilled down my cold cheeks, blood. I sat mortified, reaching helplessly for him as scarlet began to fall like rain beneath the men.

Whatever hope I had left for escape was gone as I watched my partners body being flung around like a rag doll. His body dropped like a bag of stones, the thick snow cradling his sides. His chest rose and fell shakily, the dark red spot on his stomach growing with every passing minute.

 

“...no..don’t you dare. Don't you fucking dare leave me!” I sobbed, dragging myself closer to him.
Fletcher opened his mouth in attempts to console my whimpering when a firm hand wrapped around my ankle, dragging my backwards.

 

“now, now, kitten. Don't go leavin jus’ yet, the party's just getting started~” I snarled, twisting myself around but received nothing but a shift kick to the stomach from another soldier.

 

In that moment I felt my heart stop, shaky hands wrapping around my stomach. “don't take them from me-” I hiccuped, my tears starting to freeze against my skin “please…”

 

“C’mon now, I hate seein a lady cry. Even if its a savage beast like you” his boot nudged my face in attempts to turn me over. I could feel the snow crunch under his feet as he knelt down, the pungent smell of tobacco and old liquor clung to his breath and clothing. “well, I suppose we could make a trade. I'll let your lil brat live if you'll be mine, you’re a real looker for a dangerous creature.”

 

His voice made my skin crawl, his putrid smell would probably cling to my corpse so strongly that the birds would lose interest. As much as I desperately wanted to know the life growing inside of me, I knew deep down he'd kill us both. We were monsters to humans, and nothing was going to change that.

 

His hand traced the curvature of my jawline, his thumb pressing against my lower lip “how's that sound sugar?~”

 

How dare you? My lips curled back into a snarl as I sank my fangs into his thumb, immediately clamping down with full force. His startled cry left me unfazed as I applied more pressure, my teeth cutting through the rough muscle. For what seemed like ages my teeth sunk deeper into his thumb when finally my teeth clashed against one another.

The man stumbled back with a yell “That fucking bitch took my damn finger off!” He yelled, holding his other hand over the now gushing wound.

I spat out the chunk of flesh, the metallic taste of blood stained and splattered against my tongue.

Once again the kicking returned, but much rougher, I hoped and prayed my child would go silently and painless while somewhat protected by my walls.

I was too dazed, I was in that diluted sense where everything and everyone was muted. I couldn't feel the many hands it took to roll me onto my back to expose my sensitive underbelly. The sharp pain of the cold metal piercing my stomach pushed out a cry of writhing pain, my limbs held down as I was gutted like a fish.

 

The blade drove deeper, the mixture of blood and other bodily fluids flooded out of the opening. I could feel every nerve, every tissue as the dull metal raked my insides. The pain was unbearable, I could barely keep myself conscious much less my eyes open. Suddenly I felt lighter. It was a sickening feeling. Barely conscious my gaze shifted to the men that stood in front of me, practically dangling their prize in my face. My child. Once meant to live under the protective and watchful eye of my partner and I now hangs lifeless at the hands of man.

 

“Enjoy your final moments, savage” the fat man sneered, holding a cloth over his hand.

I laid there in the snow, open and exposed to the elements like a discarded kill. I felt a few last weak tears roll down my cheeks, changing to a soft pink as they hit the snow. A thousand apologies went off in my head, all the pain that was endured, the suffering of a life that had yet to truly live. This is how I'm going to die.

Much to my surprise I felt a soft hand touch my cheek, the familiar scent made me wish I was gone already.

 

“it's okay, it's okay my love…you did your best” my eyes opened weakly, meeting the soft pained green gaze of Fletcher.

 

Huffing I attempted to move closer in his embrace, weakly nuzzling his collarbone. “no-no it's not okay- it wasn't supposed to be like this-!” my words came out in short breaths and hiccups. “w-we were going to see the ocean a-and the places beyond here...we were going to be free...”

 

A soft hand was brought to my cheek as he began to hum “shh…”

More tears flooded down my cheeks as the soft melodies fell from his lips. His body trembled lightly as a few tears slid down his cheek. Much to my surprise a small smile tugged at his pained expression. Even now I realized how much he meant to me, in death he’d still smile for me.

 

“Come with me...my love…” he murmured, pressing his lips against my cheek. His arm winding around my hip weakly.

“To the sea-” I choked out, blinking the tears from my eyes

“The sea of love…” his voice softened “I...wanna tell you...how much-” I pressed my forehead against his, closing my eyes. I could feel his body growing colder, and breathing becoming softer. The final phrase that fell from his lips still makes my heart heavy, his final squeeze on my arm.

 

“I love you…”

 
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