Common Ground

Childhood friends, turned more, turned upside down


13. Lazy Days

That night, all I could do was toss and turn, thinking about what I wanted; what I wanted to do. It was all so complicated and I wanted to go back to when it wasn’t, when I knew I wanted to stay in school, when I was standing at my locker freaking out about how good Trevor always looked and he never knew. Now here I was, in a band with him, dating him, living with him, and full blown contemplating dropping out at this point. I looked over at Trevor who was sleeping and quietly snoring. I smiled to myself, wondering how on earth I could get so lucky; my best friend, now my boyfriend too, a guy who really did care about me and it made me just want to give him the world, even if that included leaving school or letting him go; I honestly had no idea which one was better at this point. I felt so lost and confused with how my mind kept spinning in circles and I really just wanted it all too stop.
“You okay, babe?” Trevor asked, making me jump.
“I thought you were asleep.” I said, sighing.
“Yeah, not really. You’re tossing and turning is keeping me up.”
“I’m really sorry…” I mumbled.
“No, don’t be. What’s going on?”
“I just have a lot on my mind, nothing huge.”
“It always is with you; you go all in or you don’t at all.” Trevor mumbled, sitting up with me.
“No, it really isn’t anything huge to be honest. I just really can’t sleep.”
“I know you’re lying.” Trevor said, looking over at me with his cute sleepy eyes, making me smile. “Why are you smiling at me?”
“You just look cute.” I said, smiling as I reached up to run my hands through his hair.
“Shit you’ll put me right back to sleep with that.” I giggled and looked up at him as he looked down at me. “You know, you look pretty cute too, sleepy eyes, bed head, the whole nine yards.” I laughed and shook my head.
“Not really.”
“Yes really.” He snuggled up next to me, pulling me close. “So I have to ask…how did you make my song sound so fucking good?”
“I just don’t think it was meant to sound how you wanted it to because I didn’t change the words or anything, just the music.”
“But how?”
“Oh, I uh kind of just did most of it on my own with a little help from Bree to be honest. It was really just a lot of mixing music together.” 
“Is that something you’ve always been interesting in; producing music?”
“I always liked it as like a hobby I guess. It’s honestly pretty calming to me since you like really need to focus on every little piece of music you’re putting together.”
“I wanted to tell you after the show how fucking great I thought it was but you kind of disappeared on me there.”
“Yeah, I’m sorry.” I said, leaning onto his side.
“No, it’s okay. At least we got it out of the way.”
“Got what out of the way?” I asked, confused.
“Our first fight; it’s done and over now so we don’t need to like keep freaking out about it, you know?”
“I guess so…I’m sure we’ve had plenty though.”
“I am too, but the first as a couple, you know? Like, it’s done and now we know how to handle it the best way.”
“We do?”
“Sure; we both tend to need a little space then we can talk it out, apologize, and everything is going to be okay.” Trevor said, shrugging. “And weirdly, that song totally fit today.”
“Yeah, it really did. All I wanted was to like shove my stubbornness aside and wanted you there but you know, I’m too fucking stubborn and I suck.” I said slowly.
“Okay I was just as stubborn later in the night so honestly we can both take blame for that. But all that matters now is that we now know what we have to do if the guys need a break; we just walk off and you have your own mini set list since you’re not on every song.” Trevor said as I laughed and rolled my eyes.
“Yeah, okay.” I said.
“No, I’m serious. I think it’s fucking awesome what you did, no matter how I acted today. And hat second song, like damn, you and your friend were fucking great!”
“Thanks…” I said slowly.
“How do you know him? The music program?”
“Yeah but just so you know, he’s also Damian’s best friend.” I said slowly.
“Okay that sort of bothers me, not going to lie.” Trevor said after a long pause.
“Yeah I figured it would.”
“So why did you do it?”
“Because…I thought the surprise would be enough. It’s not like I’m speaking to Damian or anything but I just figured you should know that too since you were asking.”
“As long as Damian isn’t involved in that I guess I can suck it up, just like I’m doing with you and Emily I guess.”
“That’s not really the same…” I said slowly.
“No, maybe not but honestly, I’m not going to fight you on hanging out with an old friend, it’s dumb, as long as there really is no Damian involved.”
“There really isn’t.” I said. “Do you not trust me?”
“It’s not that…I just remember sort of meeting him at a show a couple weeks ago and all he could do was stare at you like…”
“Like he wasn’t over me, right?”
“Yeah…” Trevor said slowly.
“Yeah, that’s why I don’t talk to him.” I said. “I don’t want to get warped all up in that shit so I stayed away. And plus, now I have you and you’re more than any girl could ask for.”
“You’re just saying that to distract me.” Trevor said, half smiling at me.
“Maybe; but it’s also true. I don’t know anyone more perfect for me than the guy who makes me feel loved, cared for, special, safe…” I said, trailing off.
“Damn, set that bar really fucking high why don’t you?” Trevor joked, making me laugh.
“You are the bar, Trevor; everyone is going to be compared to you, not that there is anyone to compare since you’re already mine.” I said. I wrapped my arms around him, starting to feel sleepy finally.
“Are you feeling a little better?” Trevor asked me and I nodded. “Okay, goodnight babe, I love you.”
“I love you.” I whispered as Trevor got comfy again, pulling me close to him as we started to fall asleep together.
When I next up the next morning, technically afternoon, I heard Trevor out on the roof playing his guitar and softly singing. I smiled, snuggling back into the bed, just listening as it was calming. I closed my eyes again, just listening to his voice and the softness of everything that seemed to be coming from the guitar and his voice.
After a few minutes, I finally sat up, grabbed a book and dug my nose in it, still not wanting to move since this was my day off. I was not ready to get up and see anyone, I just wanted to stay here, listening to Trevor, getting lost in a book, and staying all wrapped up.
“How long have you been up?” I looked up to see Trevor standing there, putting his papers and guitar away. I looked over to the clock and shrugged.
“A couple hours.” I said, shrugging.
“Seriously? And you haven’t even moved?”
“No, I’m tired and just wanted to relax. Listening to you, reading, staying in bed, yeah that is pretty fucking relaxing after the crazy week I had.”
“Okay well what are you reading?” He asked me. I half closed it and showed him the cover.
"It’s a book of poems.” I said. “It typically inspires me.”
“To do what?” Trevor asked, plopping down next to me, laying down, and putting his hands behind his head.
“To write.”
“Shit, you write too?” Trevor questioned.
“As I said, we have a lot more in common than you think we do.” I pointed out.
“Yeah I know, you told me but I feel like every time we end up on a new topic, it’s like we’re similar in that aspect and not different like I always think we are…”
“Yeah well…we have a lot more in common than you think, but most people already know.”
“Like how is it that you are literally more and more perfect for me than I ever knew and yet everyone else knew and didn’t tell me?”
“Because why would someone tell me I would be perfect for you? Would you honestly have listened to them?”
“Yeah, good point.” Trevor said slowly.
“Yeah so I kept to myself and figured, or at least hoped, one day this would happen so I would be able to show you…”
“I don’t know why you didn’t just tell me all of this yourself before-hand.”
“As I said before, I didn’t want you to think it was because I was trying to impress you. I wanted you to like me for me as you knew me and just…learn the rest as it came up I guess.”
“Well shit, it worked cause every time I learn something knew it’s like a whole other reason to just tack on to why I love you. It kills me.” I laughed and leaned my head back.
“Yeah well it’s not like you’re all open and shit either.” I pointed out.
“What on earth does that mean?”
“Shit, you’ve been super secretive about your new songs as of late, you won’t even let me sneak a peek, I learned you are not in as good of shape as you look, you are the lightest of lightweights when it comes to drinking and with how much you drink that blows my damn mind, and I’m sure I’ll learn more as we keep dating and living together and shit.” I said, shrugging, half laughing.
“Shit, I’m not sure if I should be insulted or not.”
“That’s all on you, I’m just telling you what I’ve learned about you the past couple weeks.”
“Yeah, very bluntly.” I giggled and slid down into bed. “You really don’t look like you want to move.”
“No, no I do not.” I sighed. “I feel so drained, I don’t even know how you guys do this almost every weekend to be honest.”
“Yeah it gets to be a lot but honestly, you just get used to it; all the weird hours and the long days.”
“Yeah, I wish. I won’t lie, sometimes I miss just being the little fan girl, standing front row, watching all you guys up on stage.”
“Yeah…it was so much fun. I mean, so is being on stage with you guys, don’t get me wrong, but I just have mini moments where I just…I just picture myself in the crowd looking up at you as you wink at smirk at me like you used to.”
“Yeah now I guess I’ll just have to do that on stage.” Trevor joked. I laughed and rolled my eyes.
“I’m like so positive that will fix literally everything.”
“I know it will.”
“Okay, Trev, whatever you say.”
“I seriously think it will fix everything.” I rolled over, looking at him as he winked and smirked at me, making me laugh again. “See, already fixing things.”
“You’re so full of yourself.”
“I have to live up to my expectations…so yeah I have to be.”
“It’s a good thing you’re damn cute.” I said, rolling on top of him. He dropped his arms so he was holding my waist and I was resting my head on his chest, thinking I could honestly stay there forever. “Can you like not move?” I said as Trevor shifted a little.
“What, are you comfy?” He asked. I took a deep breathe, knowing he was going to pull some basic Trevor shit and nodded.
“Yes I am.”
“You know, I know you are expecting some jackass move right now but honestly I think this is perfect, just like this and I don’t really want to move either…”
“Wait, seriously?”
“You bought that?” Trevor said, laughing as he started tickling, making me scream and squeal as I tried pushing him away as I laughed. “Wait no, in all seriousness though…” Trevor started as he stopped, calming me down. “Come back, I actually really did like you there.” He gave me puppy eyes as he tried pulling me back.
“I don’t trust you right now.” I said, still laughing.
“Please babe…” I looked over at him as he kept going with the puppy eyes.
“You tickle me, I punch you.”
“Yeah you already did; you are violent when you don’t want to be tickled; lesson learned.” I smiled as I slowly rolled back over onto him and got comfy again. He slowly wrapped his arms around me again as I I started to drift to sleep, taking a little nap.  

It felt right, having her here, just like this. She had started to breath softly as she drifted to sleep and I honestly wouldn’t want to be anywhere else. I leaned my head into hers gently, just loving every moment of her being right here. It almost felt like…no it felt like, everything I ever wanted was right here. I know that sounds insane but like she was everything to me and honestly if I had to give everything up to keep her, I would. She was my life and this, this made me realize how much so she really was. Not only did I have my girlfriend right here, I had my best friend and I never knew how much that mattered in a relationship. The longer I stayed still holding her, the more tired I got so I slowly stopped fighting my eyes, letting myself drift off to sleep with her.
When we woke up, I realized neither of us had moved from where we were; literally neither of us moved. She was still on top of me in the same position and I was still holding her close, resting my head on hers.
“You up?” I whispered. She moaned and dug her face more into my necked.
“No…” She said quietly.
“Come on, it’s getting late and I’m sure dinner is ready or will be soon.”
“No…” I laughed quietly, thinking about how cute she was all snuggled into me.
“But babe…”
“You have to eat at some point today.”
“No I don’t. I like it here.” She mumbled into my ear.
“I do too, I honestly don’t want to move either but you need to literally eat at least one meal and it’s also like 5pm and you don’t want to be up all night again, do you?”
“That’s not really a good answer.”
“Shh…I don’t wanna move.”
“But you have to…”
“DINNER!” I heard my mom call.
“See, dinner is ready.”
“Fuck everything.” She finally mumbled and started moving. She pushed herself off me and I could see the sleep in her eyes, how tired she really was. I smiled and pushed her hair behind her ears. “What?”
“Just…happy.” I said, smiling up at her.
“Yeah, you woke me up; I’m not.”
“Shit, way to shut me down.”
“I love you too.” Bethany said, walking off, as per usual, without her hands and grumpy as ever when she wakes up. I smiled and laughed to myself, knowing I wouldn’t want it any other way.

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