The Dealer

Calum Hood is a drug dealer. Jayde Mills is Calum's "friend". Jayde never realized how bad the drug thing was until she visited Calum in the city and he was high the whole time.


12. Chapter 12




27 weeks pregnant

It was midnight when we found the place where the meeting for addicts was. I wrapped my sweater around my belly and rested my hands on it. I had no idea what was going to happen here and I was nervous that it was so late at night. 

"Would you like to share?" The person running the meeting asked Calum. Calum stood and introduced himself. 

"I'm here because I'm a drug addict who just recently got out of rehab." He started. I was extremely proud of him. I knew how difficult this entire process was for him and I'm sure I wasn't making it any easier on him. I was always yelling at him to get a job for the baby and I had no idea how bad the addiction actually was until I got that phone call. "My buddy found me laying face down on our living room floor after I over dosed. I have a baby on the way." He commented looking down at me. "I have to be around for her." He sat back down. 

"Thank you for sharing, Calum. I hope the best for you and your wife." 

"She's not my wife." 

"I'm not his wife." We both said at the same time. Everyone looked over at us. "I'm just having his baby." I commented looking at him. "We're not together." I played with my fingers feeling awkward. 

"Oh. I'm sorry. I still wish you the best." He smiled. 

"Thank you." I smiled back. Calum rested his hand on my belly and she right away kicked his hand. He smiled and looked down at it and I nodded. I could now see the movement on my stomach and it was awesome. I was so ready to meet her. 

When the meeting was over we walked down the street to a Chinese restaurant that was open and we got a booth. 

"What are we going to do?" I asked. 

"Well I think we should get the beef and broccoli." I laughed. 

"I meant about the baby." I smiled looking at him. 

"Oh." He looked up at me from his menu. "I don't know." He commented. 

"My offer still stands. If you don't want to be apart of this, you don't have to be but your family does so I'm not going to stop them from seeing her." He was silent and somehow I just knew that he didn't want her anymore. I wasn't sure if I should be upset. From the very beginning I told him that he didn't need to be here if he didn't want to. 

The waitress came over and took our order before leaving again and I sipped on my drink. I stayed quiet hoping that he would say something, anything to assure me that I wasn't going to be doing this all on my own. He stayed silent. 

"Hey, it's Calum right?" A guy came over and held out his hand for Calum to shake. 


"I'm Shane. I was at the meeting with you." Calum shook his hand. 

"It's nice to meet you. Would you like to sit?" Calum asked and moved over to let Shane sit. 

"Thanks." He sat down. 

"This is Jayde. My friend." Calum said and Shane reached across the table to shake my hand. 

"Nice to meet you." He said smiling. 

"You too." I smiled back. 

"I was wondering if you had a sponsor?" Shane asked and Calum shook his head. "Are you looking for one?" 

"Oh uh, I hadn't really thought about it." Calum looked over at me. I thought it would be a great idea. He needed someone who wouldn't get angry with him or yell at him about things he's done, unlike me. 

"Think about it." Shane said. "Here's my number. Call or text me whenever you want. I won't be offended if you don't." He smiled before standing up. "It was nice meeting both of you." He commented before leaving. After he left the waitress came over and we ordered what we wanted. 

"Think I should get a sponsor?" He asked. 

"Yeah. I think it'll be good. Get someone who isn't going to use your past against you." I commented. I wanted the best for him and if he decides that he needs someone, I'll support him and if he decides that he doesn't then I'll do my best to be here for him. 

If Calum decides that he doesn't want to be in the babies life I'll be all alone. I'll have to do the midnight feedings myself, when the baby is sick and I have to work she'll still have to go to daycare. Everything I would be doing on my own and that scared me. I didn't want to beg him to stay and to want to her but I needed him to. 

Once we finished eating we walked back to the car and I got in and started it up and turned the heat on. 

"Do you want me to drive you home or do you just wanna stay with me?" I asked. I felt awkward asking him to stay the night even though he's done it a dozen times since high school. I remember one of the very first times we hooked up he stayed the night and the next morning my mom walked in to find us cuddling in my bed. I was grounded for a month. 

"I'll stay with you. It's late." He commented texting someone. I pulled into my spot and got out. It was getting harder to get in and out of it with my belly. By the time I got to the door of the apartment I was out of breath. I opened the door and went inside taking my shoes off and heading for my bedroom. I was exhausted I just needed to crawl into bed. 

The room was a mess with baby books and baby things all over the place. I was doing my best to organize things and build things. Luke, Julia's husband had come over last week to help me put the heavy things where I wanted. He was most likely going to have to come back to help me build the crib. 

"Woah." Calum said as he came in the room. "That's a lot of baby things." He said looking around. I already had the cot set up in the corner so that the first month of the babies life she would be sleeping in here with me so I could keep an eye on her. 

"Yeah, sorry." I grabbed some clothes and went to change. I came back out and he was looking at the directions for the swing that I planned to put in the living room. He had the base of it already built. "You don't have to do that." I commented going to the bed. 

"It's alright." He smiled at me. I laid down in bed while he built it. About an hour later he broke the silence. "Where do you want it?" 

"In the living room." It was nearing 2 am and I was exhausted and I wish he would just lay down but I figured that wouldn't be happening anytime soon. 


Jayde finally fell asleep and I was snooping around the house. I opened the door to the guest room that was transformed into a mostly done nursery. I walked over to the dresser that was covered in lotions and other things that the baby would need. 

There was a dresser in the corner, the changing table in the middle of the wall on the same wall as the door and the crib was still in the box on the furthest wall from the door. The walls were still plain white but there were now pictures of elephants hung up along with a picture of me and Jayde and another of an ultrasound picture. 

I couldn't decide if this was the life that I wanted. I had no idea if I would be able to be a dad. It's scary. I had no idea how to take care of a baby. How am I suppose to be a dad? Me? I knew that it would crush Jayde if I decided that I couldn't do this but I also knew that she would understand. 

So I ran. I ran out of the apartment and down to the train station and bought a ticket home. I couldn't be in there with all of those baby things. I got back home around 4 and went to take a shower. Once I was done I got out and snuck into Ashton's room to grab his laptop. 

Ashton was up at 5:30 to work out and he came into the living room and saw me. 

"What are you doing?" He asked. "It's 5:30. Cal, go to bed." 

"I couldn't sleep." 

"Why are you even here? I thought you were going to make things better with Jayde?" He asked rubbing his eyes and stretching. 

"I saw all of the baby stuff and I ran." 

"Does she know?" He asked and I shook my head. "Go to bed, Cal." He said again. He walked over and I quickly deleted the search history before closing the laptop and heading to bed. I slept for a few hours before I woke up to my phone ringing that thankfully Ashton was paying the bill for me. 

I had two missed calls from Jayde and 5 text messages from her. I turned my phone off. I felt terrible for doing this to her but I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to handle being a dad. 

There was a knock on the door before it swung open and Ashton came over. I opened my eyes to look at him. 

"Just making sure you're alive. Jayde has called me like 10 times." He said. "Should I tell her that you're alive and well?" 

"If she calls again just tell her I need some time." 

"Alright. Do you want anything to eat?" He asked. 

"What are you gonna make?" I asked turning over and sitting up. 

"Whatever you want." He commented. "I'll go to the store." 

"I'll come with you." I stood up and got dressed. He was waiting by the front door for me and we both left and got in his car. 

'Please just tell me if you're alive' A text came through from Jayde but then my phone died. I plugged it into the charger but I had no intention of texting her back. We got to the food store and both went in. I pushed the cart while Ashton picked stuff out. 

His phone began to ring and he looked at it. 

"Jayde?" I asked and he nodded before answering. 

"He's fine Jayde. He said he needs some time." He paused so she could respond. "I'm not sure how long." He looked at me. "Yes he's alive." He turned and kept walking listening to what she had to say. "Only a little. I'm at the food store." He pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose and I could tell he was trying so hard not to sigh. "Okay. Call if you go into labor." He commented. "Bye." He hung up and put the phone back in his pocket. 

"What did she say?" 

"Just asked if you were still alive and if I was annoyed with her." I nodded at his words and kept walking. "Maybe you should just call her." 

"I need some time." 

"I know I know." He commented. We finished our shopping and I was able to give Ashton some money for it even though he tried to tell me it was fine, I slipped it into his coat pocket when he wasn't paying attention. 

I carried in the bags while he put everything away and started cooking. 

"Can I borrow your laptop?" I asked and he nodded and I went back to researching what I was before. I shouldn't have even thought about doing this. 


I still hadn't heard from Calum and I was getting worried. He made it pretty obvious that he wanted nothing to do with the baby. I felt terrible for annoying Ashton about it so I stopped calling. 

I was freaked out when I woke up that morning and he was gone and wouldn't answer his phone. I figured he had gone home but I had no idea why. I think that's what hurt the most, he was never going to explain to me why he just left. 

Instead of sitting around all day waiting for Calum to call me back, I decided to start washing baby clothes and getting everything ready. I packed two hospital bags, one for me and one for her. 

The rocking chair was being delivered today which made me super happy. I was getting more and more excited for her to come. I was only 12 weeks away from my due date and it seemed like the entire pregnancy flew by. 

The men brought the rocking chair in and set it up where I wanted it. I tipped them both before they left and I sat down in it and rubbed my belly. So very soon she would be here and I would be sitting here rocking her to sleep and singing lullaby's to her. 

I grabbed a notebook from my room and started writing down names that I liked. I wanted something that wasn't common but not something that was crazy and people would make fun of her all through school because of her name. I wrote down a few names before closing the book. 

I looked around the babies room that was nearly ready for her arrival. I had no idea how I was going to do this all on my own. 

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