Too Broken To Love

*THIS IS A JASMINE CENTINA FANFICTION STORY*

Naoni is the type of girl who masks her true feelings and pain to make others happy. She has been in a relationship for the past 4 years. To outsiders, they're happy and "GOALS" but behind closed doors, it's a nightmare. A nightmare that replays for her over and over again. Just when she thinks things get worse, they change for the better. But what's the reason for this change? Or should i say who?


( This story starts of fast.... It was written this way to show that time means nothing. Years and months cannot be compared to the person behind them. So who will Naoni choose? Years or months?)


** THESE PICTURES AREN'T MINE, JUST USED TO MAKE THE STORY MORE INTERESTING, AND EASIER TO UNDERSTAND WITH A FACE TO MATCH THE CHARACTERS. **


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1. Pretend

 NICOLE  

 

Naoni's P.O.V

It's 11pm and I just came home from work. (I'm a doctor and there was a severe car accident that injured 20 people). People think I'm so lucky to have Nicole, but they don't see what really happens. I pulled myself out of my thoughts once i reached the steps to my apartment. The lights were on in the living room, and i knew that there would be no peace tonight. I prepared myself for the worst as i unlocked the door. There stood my "Innocent" girlfriend.

"Why the fuck are you home so late?!?!" Screamed Nici(Nicole).
"N-Nici there was an emergency and I - I t-t-texted you at 8." I was so afraid of her. After everything she put me through, her abuse was still unpredictable. 
"Naoni i don't give a Fuck. i called you, anybody could have texted me. When I call you fucking answer me! Got it!!!"
"Y-Yes." I couldn't help but stutter she looked so upset and i didn't want to make it worse. i just kept thinking about how things were, and I missed how things used to be. How she used to be. We're both studs (I hate labels but eh) and she used to be okay with it, but her friends would always tell her that she looked like a lil bitch, and that i looked better as a "girl". So she would force me to dress different around them. i hated it but she would hurt me if i didn't. She had complete control over me and she knew it. I hated that, I used to be strong and confident, but she finally overpowered me and I didn't know how to take it back. I didn't realize that I zoned out until i felt a sting on my cheek and she was standing over me.
"So you can't speak bitch!" she yelled. She stooped down to look me in my eyes and she hit me again. i got up and knocked her in her shit a couple of times which I quickly regretted. "You shouldn't have done that." she said calmly before she knocked me to the ground and laughed as she kicked me over and over again. I tried to hold in my screams because that's what she wanted. She felt powerful and satisfied when i screamed. That was something i learned over the years. When i look at her, I see a totally different person. the woman i fell in love with is gone. She's been gone for years now. I want to leave so bad, but i have no where else to go and that would be the hardest thing to do knowing that Nici is fucking crazy. I stayed on the ground and blocked my face as she beat me. i couldn't fight back anymore,i already made it worse. After about an hour she left. this meant i had about two days to myself then she would come back and apologize. She goes out and fucks whoever. She plays them with her charm because no one knows who she really is, but when she comes back home, she brings gifts and flowers and tells me she loves me and that she's sorry, but the funny thing was, it was the same story every time.

---------------- 2 HOURS LATER ---------------------

I finally got up and made my way to the bathroom sobbing at every step i took. I looked in the mirror and didn't recognize the girl staring back at me. The strong confident girl i used to be was gone because of Nici but she was slowly coming back, and when she did, I was out of here. Tears slowly trickled down my face as i examined the damage. my face wasn't that bad because Nici stopped making things obvious, she stopped leaving bruises in places that were visible and would cause people to ask questions. I had a busted lip, a black eye, and a scratch along my eyebrow. I knew i could cover everything with makeup. As long as people didn't get too close, but my co-workers knew not to. However, there's a new girl and she might be hard to get rid of. The rest of my body was so bad, it was scary. I had bruises going up my sides. My wrist were bruised too but i don't remember how, My legs and arms had scratches on them and so did my stomach and my back was the worst. There were deep gashes and bruises, but i blacked out after a while so I don't remember everything that happened. I turned the shower on and laid down. Hissing at the pain the water causes on my cuts but i ignored it. I just laid there thinking about the what ifs. What if I never met her? What if she was different? I didn't understand why this was happening but I know everything happens for a reason even this bad. i just wanted this to stop. i couldn't take it anymore. After about an hour i got out and got ready for bed. I didn't want to eat so i just threw on a T-shirt because I was so sore. I couldn't do much and I didn't want to endure anymore pain for the night.

NEXT MORNING

I woke up feeling worse than last night. My body was sore but I got ready for work anyways. I put on my scrubs and grabbed my jacket and my white hospital coat and my name tag. It was 6 in the morning when i left the house and it felt good to know that Nici wasn't here right now and i wish it could always be like this. As I drove to work, the scene from last night replayed in my head over and over again. I pulled up in my parking spot and noticed a Ferrari in the other reserved spot for head doctors. Before today, I was the only doctor who could do everything. I didn't know who the new girl was yet because no one told me and her name plate wasn't on her spot yet. I was really curious about this mystery girl. I sat in my car and put on makeup trying to hide the bruises. I even put on fucking lipstick. I walked inside the hospital and headed for my office. My best friend Tyler was sitting in my chair shaking his head.

"Aye wassup Ty." I said as i dapped him up. He looked so heart broken.
"Wassup Ny. Why in the fucking hell do you have on lipstick? Who are you and where is my best friend?" 
"My friend dared me to wear lipstick for a whole day and she'd give me $200 but Bro wassup with you? Why you look hurt?" 
"It's always the sexy ones bro. The new girl is fine asf but she plays for your team."
"OOOh Realllly?" I said with the cockiest smirk on my face. 
"Yes, I'll help you but you gotta kill Nici first." He was the only one who knew the real Nici.
I looked down knowing I had to change the subject before last night pops up. He knew when shit went wrong and i didn't know if I could handle that right now. Just then Miracle (fam from another life time lol), who was a nurse walked in and told me to go scrub up because there was a heart surgery taking place and the new girl was already in a surgery. Damn day one and she already working, that's wassup. I got ready and walked into the room ready to start. it was a 3 year old boy who was on the list for a heart transplant. I would always bring him toys and balloons and flowers to cheer him up. He was the sweetest thing and it would hurt me if I didn't try and help him. We grew a bond and i loved this kid like my own.

-------------------- 3 HOURS LATER --------------------

The procedure was over and he was brought back to his room to recover. I walked out and there were eyes on me mainly because I had on some damn lipstick, but no one believed he would make it,and i proved them wrong. I was determined to save him. He was my baby. Miracle grabbed my arm, i pulled away slightly and bit my lip feeling the pain shoot up my arm. I never told her because i didn't want Nici to hurt her. Blood started to seep through my sleeve and she looked concerned.
"Ny??? What..W-What is wrong? What's going on?" I wanted to tell her but me and tyler knew we couldn't.
" Nothing Ty came over last night and my dumbass walked into him when he was cooking. i cut my arm on the knife but i'm ok." I smiled and kissed her cheek to reassure her. I looked around to jog my memory so i knew where i was. My eyes met a pair of light brown ones and everything stopped. I realized they were the "Mystery Girl's" but i didn't get a look at her face. Tyler pulled me into the storage room to clean my arm.

"NY!!!???" He whisper-yelled. i didn't speak, I couldn't. i just looked at him. He shook me and all i could think about were those eyes. 
"Huh?" I answered once the numbness died down.
"You need to leave her. It's getting worse. You can't keep doing this."
"I know Ty. I know." I managed to whisper. He looked into my eyes and started squinting. I turned my head and looked down trying to get his eyes off my face before he noticed anything, but it was too late, he grabbed my chin, lifting my face up and rubbed his hands against my eye, and then my lip. His eyes began to tear and as he revealed the cut on my eyebrow. "Ny!! You need to leave her! I'm not playing anymore!" 
"I don't know how. She'd come for me.'
"You've been taking classes to build your strength back up, you're working on getting a new place. You need to stop trying to forget about your lifestyle Ny, you will always be "trigger". You need to get out of there." That was the last thing he said before he walked out. 5 minutes later and i still stood there. I didn't want to bandage my wounds because i wasn't ready for the pain. Just then, the door opened and I hoped Ty came back and that it wasn't Miri (Miracle) that found me. 
"Ty please help me. I will leave her, I promise but my arms are killing me." I turned around but it wasn't Miri or Ty, it was her. The Mystery girl and she was fucking beautiful.

Mystery Girl's P.O.V

After I walked out of the surgery room, which was where the brain surgery on a woman who was in the massive car accident last night was. I kept my distance from the crowd that started to form outside of the room Doctor Naoni Williams was in. She finally came out, and she was gorgeous. She had dreads that were dyed turquoise at the tips. She had on makeup and she looked drained and scared of something. Just then Miracle one of the nurses, grabbed her arm and pulled her towards the lounge area. Naoni pulled back slightly when blood started to seep through her shirt. Miracle panicked and started asking questions. She told her a story after she looked at Tyler. They seemed really close and they both had a scared looked on their faces. Naoni looked satisfied with her story but i could tell it was bullshit. She kissed Miracle's cheek. Instantly the fear in her eyes slowly melted as Naoni reassured her. I had a wave of mixed emotions going through me I was sad that she was hiding pain, i was angry that she kissed Miracle and that i couldn't help her, and i was intrigued by her. I wanted her, and i didn't even know her. She started looking around and then our eyes locked. Her beautiful golden brown eyes looked so broken and scared. I wanted to just wrap my arms around her and make sure she was safe. I never felt like this toward any girl and what made it even more weird was that i didn't know her. Just then Tyler pulled her into a storage closet not too far from me. i didn't listen to their conversation on purpose, they were kinda loud. I didn't hear much but Tyler kept telling her to leave someone. If i was assuming right, then it was her girlfriend and that made me even more upset. Why would someone purposely hurt their lover. She doesn't really love her then. Tyler left but she stayed in there. 5 minutes passed by and she was still in there. Tyler looked at me and smiled, then nodded towards the door. I gave him a confused look but he did it again."She needs you man. I don't know her."
"Yea, but she won't listen to me,maybe she'll listen to you."
"But why me?"
"Because you seem like you would understand." I took a deep breath and grabbed the handle and looked at him which only made his smile grow as he jumped up and down like a little kid, and I walked in. She let out a sigh of relief and started speaking. "Ty please help me. I will leave her i promise, but my arms are killing me." She sounded so broken and her voice cracked. She was shaking slightly but she didn't turn around yet. i was slightly nervous so i stood there for a minute. Suddenly, she turned around and she was beautiful. Everything seemed to stop and we were the only ones there. i looked deep into her eyes and saw tears and pain. She looked shocked and scared that I wasn't Tyler.

"U-Um.. H-Hi."
"Hey" I said lowly as i smiled. Not taking my eyes off of her.
"Y-you weren't supposed to hear that. I don't want you to judge me. We don't even know each other. I mean i wouldn't blame you if you did, but I-." I cut her off in the middle of her rant. It was kinda cute but i wanted to help her clean up. 
"I'm not gonna judge you. Why would I? You're in a tough situation and I know what that feels like. I know we don't know each other but we should get to know each other. I wanna be there for you." She looked at me shocked and relieved.
"Wow.... W-w-why do you want t-to help m-me. I'm a f-freak. y-you don't even k-know me. I-i don't want you to get hurt because of me." She looked afraid when she spoke the last part but she was smiling.
"You're not a freak Naoni. I won't get hurt because I can hold my own, and I want to help you because i was in a similar situation that you're facing and I know what it feels like. "
"H-How do you k-know my name?" 
"Everyone knows you. You're an amazing Doctor. You're mentioned in magazines and newspaper articles. You're good at what you do and it's pretty obvious that you love you're job and you're not doing it for the money." She smiled and looked down at her feet. She let her dreads hide her face as her cheeks turned a light red. 
"Well what's you're name pretty eyes?" She asked as she gave me a cocky smirk. She's good.
"hmmm Pretty eyes?" She nodded but kept her ground. "OK ma. My name's Jasmine, but call me Jas." 
"Well hey Jas." She looked up at me and smiled. For some reason I wanted her to be treated better and I wanted to be the one to do it. 
"Naoni?"
"Hmmm?" She answered while she rubbed her arms. A tear escaped her eye and I knew she was in pain, but she didn't want to admit it.
"Let me help you." 
"N-no I'm f- I-I'm ok." She looked down and nodded, like she was trying to convince herself.
"I'll be gentle ok?" She nodded again. "I won't do anything to hurt you. I promise. "
"Okay Jas." I grabbed some bandages and some other items and Naoni rubbed her hand against my pocket on my uniform. I looked at her and picked her up placing her on the counter. She looked in my eyes but she looked scared. I held her cheek in my hand. 
"Ny??? I'm not her okay? I won't do anything to hurt you i promise." I kissed her hand and looked at her. 
"You j-just met me Jas. Be careful what you say." I looked at her. Hurt and pain written across both of our faces. 
"I meant what I said Naoni. I know we're not perfect, no human is, but i wouldn't hurt you intentionally. If i hurt you ever, I would do anything for you to forgive me, but I wouldn't purposely hurt you. I don't know why I feel this way with you knowing you're a stranger but i meant every word" It was silent after my little speech, and she seemed shocked by my words shit, I was too. I smiled at her giving her some reassurance before I placed peroxide on on a cotton ball and gently dabbed her wounds. She hissed slightly at first but looked relieved when i finished wrapping both arms. 
"Thanks Jas." She said after she wrapped her arms around my neck. I wrapped my arms around her waist in response and it felt amazing. Holding her so close to me. I didn't want to let her go. We stood like that for about 3 minutes. We finally let go and she started walking towards the door. 
"Wait." I didn't want her to leave yet, she couldn't. When would I talk to her again? We're so busy it might be a while. 
"Yea?" 
"C-Can i get you're number?" 
She chuckled lightly and I got nervous. "You already do. I saved it when you got the materials for my wounds. Just be careful I don't want Nici to get mad. I'll text you when i can ok?" She went back to being scared every time she talked about her girl. That pissed me off. That's not what a relationship was. I pulled her into another hug, wrapping my arms around her sides. She whimpered and pulled away from me. I frowned in response but seconds later, I was filled with concern.
"Naoni?"
"J-Jasmine?"
"A-are there more?" she looked down and nodded while she shifted her weight from each foot.
"C-can i see them?"
"J-Jas....W-why do y-you care s-so much i-if we just m-met?"
"I don't know Ny but I do. you're different and I feel like i have to protect you. Please. L-let me see." She nodded and lifted her shirt. She hissed as she raised her arms and lifted her shirt up. I gasped in disbelief every inch of her body was marked in bruises and scratches. There were bruises the size of fists and a footprint. My eyes watered and she put her shirt down. She raised her pants legs up and those were even worse. I sat down on the counter and started crying.
"I-I'm s-s-sorry N-Ny!" memories of my past flowed back and I could imagine what she felt.
"Why are you crying? It's not your problem Jas."
"My dad used to abuse me before i went off to college. He didn't like the fact that i was lesbian and he called me a dyke. He hated who i was and took out everything on me. That killed me on the inside. knowing that i was apart of him and he couldn't stand me. He tried to kill me Ny. He was my blood. I can only imagine how you feel. giving your heart to someone hoping they can take away the pain of you're past but only make your life worse. I'm sorry Naoni." We were both in tears. She sat next to me and hugged me until we stopped crying. We got up after a while and left. We went into the lounge with everyone and Tyler walked up to us.
"Hey Ny. You good?" he asked but he looked at me and I nodded.
"Yea, I'm good jas helped me out since you left me." She glared at him and he held his hands up in defense. He kissed her cheek and walked away. Some light skinned girl kept starring at us and shaking her head. 
"SHIT" Ny whispered. "Fuck Fuck Fuck" She said as the girl came over. 
"Who is that Ny?"
"Nici's spy. She probably thinks we're doing something we're not and that means she told Nici and that also means that's my ass when she gets back." She started shaking as the girl stopped in front of us. 
"Hey Ny, Nici is a good girlfriend why would you cheat. She's new and shit." She looked at me and shook her head again. "Jasmine did you even know she had a girl?" 
"Yes I did and so do I Ms. Whoever. We didn't do anything Tyler asked me to help her fix the supplies in the storage room cause she knocked them over when he said he wanted to try Nici out. She defended her girl and I went in there to clean up the mess. i wouldn't mess no body's relationship up. Especially when i got my own, so stop being someone's lil bitch and get you somebody damn." She stood there speechless as Ny and Tyler died laughing. Ny told him to come over here before Nici's lil bitch came over here to be nosy. 
"Damn you're good." Tyler said while he tried to catch his breath. "you got a girl for real?"
"Nah lol just knew she'd look stupid." I smirked. i looked at Ny and winked. She looked down making her hair cover her face again as she slightly blushed.
"I got to go y'all. See y'all later." Ny said as she dapped us up and left. After she left Tyler just looked at me and then back at the direction she went in. 
"Bro.... you want her don't you?"
"mmm man, you don't even know."
"You don't care that she's a "stud"?" He said using air quotes.
"Nah why would I? She's a female right?" He nodded. "okay then, but why you gotta use air quotes tho?"
"Cause she don't like labels. The only label she actually accepts is lesbian . other than that, She's just Naoni Williams."
"That's understandable."
"You sure about this?"
"hell yea man."
"Ha! aight man lets get it." He said dapping me up as we went to the parking lot.

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