Pain

Ashton Irwin hated his life. His parents caused him misery, anxiety, and led to the start of his horrid depression. His purpose for living was his two younger siblings. Lauren and Harry. That is, until he meets Luke Hemmings.

Luke becomes Ashton's lifeline of sorts. Once they meet, Ashton questions how he ever survived without the cute blonde.

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Warnings: trigger warning (self-harm, depression, mention of suicide), (possible) smut warning, keep in mind this story is 16+ for a reason

Chapter One

 

 

My head was pounding when I was suddenly awoken by glass smashing in the kitchen. After glancing at my alarm clock, I sit up. No point in me going back to sleep, I have to be up for school in half an hour anyway. Besides, now that my parents are awake, I wouldn't be able to sleep even if I wanted to. Instead, I drag myself out of bed, trudge to my closet, and pull out a hoodie before tugging it onto my naked torso.

I needed to check on my twin siblings, Lauren and Harry, to make sure my parents' drunk endeavors didn't leave them injured. If it was up to me, Lauren and Harry (who are only a year old) would stay by my side at all times. But sadly, school is still a requirement, and I have a part-time job at a local movie theater.

My siblings were still sleeping when I reached their bedroom, which gave me peace of mind. I tip-toed my way to their crib (that, yes, they shared, no matter how unsafe that was. My parents didn't care) so that I wouldn't wake them. Upon inspection they both seemed okay, other than a few bumps and bruises that were already there. When my parents were drunk, nobody is off-limits, including the innocent babies.

When I say parents, I'm actually referring to my mom and step-dad. My real dad had died when I was just the twins' age, so I didn't remember much about him, other than that he had a thick mustache and always smelled of cigars. I like to imagine him as a kind, gentle, and loving father, which is the opposite of my stepdad, Rob. My mom on her own was never this bad. Maybe a bit emotionally detached, but at least she kept her hands to herself.

I made sure Lauren and Harry had clean diapers before exiting back to my bedroom as quietly as I could; I didn't want my mother and Rob knowing I was awake just yet. I still had some time to myself, which was rare. I hoped they would fall back asleep, but no such luck. I heard my mother coughing from the kitchen, and I could smell the 'breakfast' Rob was attempting to cook burning in the kitchen. One day he's going to burn the house down trying to cook, and, as mean as it sounds, I could only hope Rob was stuck inside when that day came.

I checked my clock again from my bedroom. It was time to start getting ready. It was already 6:34 and school started at 8:00. I had roughly half an hour to finish getting ready to make it to school on time since I'd have to walk. I was saving up for a car with the job that my parents didn't know about (because they'd surely take all of my money if they did find out).

Hopefully by the end of the school year, I wouldn't be dependent on my parents anymore. I already had about $600 in savings from the past year of working, which has helped a lot. There were car dealerships in my town that sold used cars affordably, so that;s where I'll be going when I finally move out.

I broke myself out of my thoughts and dragged myself to my closet once more. I threw on a pair of ripped black skinnies to go along with my hoodie. It was summer, but I couldn't wear short sleeves anyway. Too many scars littered my arms.

I could still hear my parents in the kitchen. I'd have to face them before I left. My mom wasn't so bad. She was harmless, unless she was messed up on whatever drug she could afford that day. Even then, she never got physical. She just knew all the stuff to say to really hurt you. Rob, on the other hand, was big. He was a professional fighter in college, so he was tough other than his growing beer gut.

Sneaking out the window was always an option, but the neighbors notice that. I didn't want attention drawn to my family because then it risks the twins being taken away; I was almost eighteen. I planned on moving out and taking Lauren and Harry with me this summer when school is out. I didn't know how I would afford it, but I knew that I had to.

I grabbed my backpack (that still had my work clothes in it from yesterday's shift) and headed out my bedroom door. It was only 6:46, but I knew Rob wouldn't let me pass by without messing with me.

"Anne," I could hear Rob saying, "Who's watching the little shits today?" I cringed at how he talked about the twins, but I couldn't say anything about it. It was for my safety and theirs; he'd hurt them just to prove a point to me. I wanted to wait for my mom to answer, but I knew they knew I was in the hallway. Rob would punish me for 'spying' if I didn't make my presence known.

I could feel them both looking at me as I left the hallway and entered the living room. They were seated at the kitchen table drinking coffee (which was no doubt spiked with whatever leftover alcohol they had from yesterday). Since neither of them said anything, I began to walk faster. Hopefully they wouldn't bother me.

"Ashton!" Rob yelled. Clearly today wasn't my lucky day.

I stopped walking and slowly turned to face him. He was wearing gray sweatpants and a stained wife-beater tank top. How ironic. He didn't stand from the kitchen table, which I was grateful for.

"I expect you to be home after school today. No sneaking off like yesterday, you understand?" I nodded and he gritted his teeth, "now get the fuck out."

I rushed out the door after that, not wanting to stick around for anymore. That was mild; usually I had to take at least one hit before school. I knew that I'd pay for it tonight, though. I had to go to work. And Rob was going to be pissed.

 

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Thank you for taking the time to read! If you liked this chapter, please let me know and I'll be sure to publish the next! I have a lot planned for this story (the plot and title are the same as another story I had like two years ago, so I know basically where this story is going). I hope you enjoyed!

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