My Captivator

Kairyn’s life was wonderful, almost perfect. Her parents adored her, she had just started college, she made a new friend right off the bat, and her research paper for psychology was almost complete. But, after accidentally engaging in a unpleasant blog, her world changes, and not for the better. As ex-CIA Agent, Samuel Turner, and his men, declare Kairyn their next victim, secret agents, Merrick Stone and his team members, Kota and Weston, are assigned to protect Kairyn and bring Samuel and his men to justice.

Becoming a CIA Operative at the age of twenty-two was the best thing that ever happened to Merrick, that is until he and his team members are assigned to a new mission that involves a certain young woman. The closer Kairyn grows to Merrick, she finds his heart is in the right, but his mind is in the wrong. Will she be able to convince Merrick that of all the mistakes he has made in his life, he can still be forgiven? Or will the trials she faces bring hatred into her own heart?


12. Chapter Eleven

Chapter 11:




How could I have not forgiven her? This life is hard to get used to. I went through years of emotional training. All she’s ever known is family and her own biological father was taking it away from her. I had to find something to cheer her up, to get things off her mind, so why not a walk in the woods? It was dangerous but she was right. How could ask her to trust me if I didn’t even trust myself? Yes I trusted myself, but I needed her to know that.


I finished packing some food and drinks then went to the closet to grab a few blankets. I told Kairyn to pack light because hiking in Montana was rough. The place I planned to take her was a deep valley that held the most amazing view of the stars; at least it would be some form of being home.


I walk to the kitchen and place the weapons code into the oven’s keypad. The oven opened and a steel elevator drew up from underneath. Pistols and knives lay out in an organized pattern on cushioned mats. I pulled out a 9 mm ruger and then a glock and placed them in their own slots on my shoulder holster. I then grabbed a Smith and Weston knife and placed it in its sheath.


I retyped the code and the weapons were drawn back down into the weapon pit. I put on a small jacket and then headed to Kairyn’s room. I could hear her gathering things as I neared her bedroom and I quieted. Every step I took reminded me of a lion stalking its prey. As I approached her door I stopped. She was singing, and it was beautiful. I peeked around the corner and watched her pack her small bag. Her voice rang through my ears like a lullaby and I immediately became relaxed. She moved through the chorus of the song and turned around. She jumped when she saw me and her voice cut off. “You have a beautiful voice.” I grinned at her. Her hair was in a French braid that swung around her neck and down to her the middle of her upper arm.


“Thank you.” She blushed and turned around to finish packing.


“Are you ready?”


“Yes, just about. Do you by chance have any extra blankets?” I nodded in return. “Great! It may get cold.”


“I also packed some snacks. Oh, and here.” I pulled out a pocket knife and handed it to her. When her eyes grew wide, I took her right hand and place the small knife in her palm. “Because I do trust you,” she gave me a smile, “and for other safety reasons.” She clasped the knife in her petite hands then placed it in her right front pocket.


“Thank you.” She replied.


“Just don’t use it on me.” I answered her, half serious, half joking.


She glared with a smile. “Just don’t give me a reason to.”


I smiled then crossed my heart. A moment of silence came afterwards, “We should get going if we don’t want to be to too late.”


“I’m ready.”


“Then, let’s head out.” I smiled and motioned for her to leave the room first. We walked down a few hallways, then down a flight of stairs to the back door. She went to open the door but I quickly reached out to grab her wrist. “Sorry, the alarm.” I half smiled. I moved in front of the keypad and typed in the code quick. The alarm beeped but I turned to her before I opened the door. “Before we go out, I need to set some rules.”


“Okay.” Kairyn’s eyebrows lifted.


“You are to stay close to my side. We are in Montana, and there are bears, wolves, cougars,” I raised my eyebrows to remind her of the incident at the other safe house, “and other unfriendly creatures out there. Do not leave my side, okay?” She nodded. “Second, we have to be back to the house in exactly two hours. I have to call the agency and let them know how things are going.”


“Why can’t you just call them while we are out there?” She pointed to the woods.


“No service.” I shrugged. “Now what are the two rules?”


“Stay by your side and two hours.” She smiled.


“Great, are you ready?” She only smiled and nodded, but I could tell she was trying to keep herself calm. “Then let’s go.”


We headed outside and her eyes shot immediately to the sky. She gasped and froze in awe. I loved watching her. She had the cutest expressions and movements. Her eyes lit up and she forgot the world around her. I pulled her arm and she glanced at me with star lit pupils. “Follow me.” I instructed. She listened and followed.


We walked up a small path that we had made a few years back. It made it easier to hike. We made small talk through the walk and even stopped a few times to take breaks. We walked along a small river bank and then over a rocky patch of boulders. We were getting closer to the valley but we still had a few hundred feet to hike. Kairyn started to speak but stopped when I brought my arm out in front of her. I sunk low to the ground pulling her with me.


“What is it?” She asked, instantly grabbing my arm for protection. She squatted as close to me as she could. “Merrick what is it?” She whispered.


“Shh.” I hushed her and reached for my ruger. We waited patiently and when nothing came, as I knew wouldn’t, we stood. Kairyn clung to my arm, which is what I had planned on. Who says I can’t have a little fun every now and then?


We arrived to the edge of the woods, before the valley and we came to a stop. “Close your eyes.” I told her.


“What? Why?” She gave me a funny look.


“Just do it.” When she finally closed her eyes, I spread out the blankets. I looked up and couldn’t have asked for a clearer night.


“Can I look yet? Where did you go? I’m getting a bit scared over here.” Her hands hung by her sides in small fists.


“Hang on. Almost done.” I patted away any wrinkles in the blankets, then walked over to her and she jumped when I grabbed her right hand. “Keep your eyes closed and walk.”


“You’re making me nervous.” She spoke honestly. I laughed and led her to the blanket.


“Alright, now sit down right . . . here.” She did as I told her and I sat down next to her on my blanket.


“Can I look yet?” She was getting anxious, but I had to hand it to her, she had patience.


“First, I need you to lie down.”


Even I the dark of the night I could see pink flooding her cheeks. “Uhm . . . okay, but I’m trusting you.” She spoke hesitantly. She slowly laid down and maneuvered herself in a comfortable position, arms placed behind her head so that her head was elevated.


“Comfortable?” She nodded. “Okay . . . open them.”


I don’t know what was more beautiful, the sky or the overwhelmed look she had on her face when she saw the stars. She sucked in a deep breath and I couldn’t tell if she would ever let it out. She slowly rose to sit up. Her head swiftly moved in all directions, taking in every star she could. I watched her carefully as she covered her mouth and then slowly rose to a stand.


“Merrick . . .” She whispered and it was music to my ears. Her eyes began to water and I quickly stood. Why was she crying?


“What’s the matter?” I asked her.


“I . . .I’ve never seen anything so beautiful.” She breathed out. “God is truly amazing.”


“God? What about this view?” I pointed out.


She looked at me then crossed her arms. “I see the stars Merrick. They are truly magnificent, but there would be no stars if there was no God.”


I furrowed my eyebrows. “They are stars, they have always been there.”


She looked puzzled, and glanced back up at the stars, then at me again. “Merrick, when you look at the stars what do you see?”


“I see twinkling lights.” I answered simply.


“What else?” She added.


“An expanse of the unknown?” I wasn’t quite sure what she wanted. “Why? What do you see?”


She smiled at me and thought for a moment. “I see billions of tiny reminders.”


“Reminders?” I tilted my head. “Yeah . . . that too.” I was perplexed.


“No.” She took in a deep breath and then let it out. “Each one of them has a name.”


“Of course,” she smiled at me, thinking I was on the same train of thought as her. In all seriousness I added, “There’s Bob, Joe, Clyde . . .”


“No!” She laughed. “They each have a name; a real name.”


“Well, what are they?” I asked amused.


“I don’t know,” she simply stated.


“What do you mean you don’t know?” I teased her, holding in my laughter.


“I mean, I don’t know.” She paused, growing serious. “There is no way to know the name of every single one of them; I don’t have a brain big enough. There are too many for me to even count, let alone know their names.”


“Alright, I’m lost. Where you are going with this?” I finally confessed. She huffed, and walked to stand in front of me.


“I’m not great enough to know each star by name, but God is. God knows every single one of those stars by name. Every billion and one of them.” She smiled. So, that is where she was taking this.


“Right... So, God knows each star by their own name.” I repeated her.


“Merrick, if he cares enough to know every one of those stars by name, how much more do you think he cares about us?” She held herself in a way I had never seen before.


I thought for a moment. I had never been a very religious man. With my job and all, obviously, I didn’t give much attention to The Big Guy’s opinion. However, when she asked me that question, my brain ran circles. I didn’t know much about God, or even if there was a god. But I did know that He must be an important part in Kairyn’s life. “I guess I hadn’t ever really thought about that.” I finally replied.


She smiled. “Do you believe in Him?”


She was extremely good at putting me in corners and making me squirm. “I would say that I believe in a higher being than just us humans. I never really went to church growing up, my parents never had time to take me. They never were very religious.”


“Ah, religion.” She said nonchalantly.


“What’s that supposed to mean?” I narrowed my eyes.


“Christianity isn’t just a religion Merrick. It’s a relationship with God.”


I raised my brows and smiled. “Well, maybe for you. Some people just can’t get into that sort of stuff.”


“Stuff?” Pain laced her voice. “God isn’t stuff.”


“I didn’t mean it like that.” I tried to fix what I had said. “I meant it just isn’t my cup of tea. Besides, I don’t think your God would want anything to do with me.”


“He wants everything to do with you!” She laughed in pity.


“Really? He wants a man who has killed enough people to receive awards for it?” The rise in my voice caused her to still, but she showed no fear.


“No one is perfect, Merrick. They crucified the only man who was.” She spoke out of character, almost as if she wasn’t the one speaking.


“That was nearly two-thousand years ago, Kairyn!” I tried to get it through her head. “The man you Christians claim saved you has been dead for twenty centuries!” I yelled.


She closed her eyes, then turned and looked up at the stars. I had hurt her, but what did she expect? That I would fall on my knees in prayer? No one has ever helped me or cared for me but myself. I was not about to give my life to some idol that took more lives than He gave.


“He is alive.” Her soft voice spoke through tears. “Some people just aren’t ready to accept Him.” She turned to me and gave me the sweetest of smiles. “I didn’t mean to push you.” Her voice was apologetic.


I could only stare. The wind softly blew her braided hair. She was so vulnerable, yet not even a brutish agent could bring her down. “These men have taken everything from you and what did your God do to stop them? I asked. “If He is as great as you say, then why aren’t you with your family now? Why doesn’t He strike down Samuel Turner right now?”


“No one knows God’s thoughts except God Himself.” She spoke, her hands at her sides. “All we can do is trust Him.”


“And where has that gotten you?” My voice was dry and emotionless. Her face fell as she looked into my eyes.


“Farther than the stars,” she smiled then walked back to her blanket. Sitting down, she pulled her knees to her chest and clasped her hands around her ankles, her expression filled with a strange kind of hope.

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