Quotes

This features all sorts of emotions suitable for all types of people. From love to hate, from friendship to relationship. This has all sorts.
Enjoy ~~

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5. Funny quotes

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. (Unknown)

Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything. (Unknown)

Nobody texts faster then a pissed off female. (Unknown)

When you wake up at 6 in the morning, you close your eyes for 5mins and it's 6:45. When you're at work and it's 2:30, you close your eyes for 5mins and it's 2:31. (Unknown)

Life is not a fairytake. If you lose your shoe at midnight... You're drunk. (Unknown)

If someone calls you ugly. Have a good comeback and say "Excuse me, I'm not a mirror." (Unknown)

Your attitude may hurt me. But mine can even kill you. (Unknown)

I hate it when you have to be nice to someone who you really want to throw a brick at . (Unknown)

WARNING: Due to the influence of hormones I could burst into tears or kill you in the next 5mins. (Unknown)

If you have a problem with me, call me. If you don't have my number, then that means you don't know me well enough to have a problem. (Unknown)

When killing them with kindness doesn't work. Try a baseball bat, results may vary! (Unknown)

As I have grown older, I've learned that pleasing everybody is impossible. But pissing everyone off is a piece of cake. (Unknown)

Don't mind me, I'm just returning your nose. I found it in my business again. (Unknown)

Don't tell me I haven't got any balls. I just happen to wear mine on my chest and I can guarantee that they're a lot bigger then yours... (Unknown)

I'm multi talented. I can talk and piss you off at the same time. (Unknown)

Girls who say, "lots of guys are after me." should never forget that low prices attract the most customers. (Unknown)

No, no, no I'm not insulting you. I'm just describing you. (Unknown)

If only close minds came with closed mouths. (Unknown)

Keep rolling your eyes, you might be able to find a brain back there. (Unknown)

Zombies eat brains... You're safe. (Unknown)

Oh I'm sorry.. Did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours? (Unknown)

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak. (Unknown)

When one door closes, another one opens... Or you could just open the closed door... Cause I mean that's how doors work... (Unknown)

When someone says 'expect the unexpected,' slap them and say 'you didn't expect that, did you?' (Unknown)

I'm allergic to stupidity. I break out in sarcasm. (Unknown)

 

 

 

 

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