Waking up

Imagine being on the Voyager after escaping the aliens who abducted you. You set course to earth together with Captain Janeway, Chakotay, Tuvok, Harry and Seven. Icheb gets a crush on you. Neelix teaches you how to cook. The doctor sees you as his personal psychologist. Tom and B’Ellanna are having a furious marriage.
But your abductors come back to claim you as their property.
(_Stardate 54400 – 54470; Season 7, episode 10 – 13)


10. Stuck in the elevator

Stardate 54411.8, May 31th, 2377, morning.
The ship was still hiding in a meteor field. The reparations were due to tomorrow and were going as planned. The routine life on the Voyager continued.
My history lessons with Naomi were going well. I had memorized the most important events before the air of Starfleet. Now we had started a chapter about the first Enterprise. Captain Archer had been in command, there was a war being mentioned, the Xindi incident. (http://memory-alpha.wikia.com/wiki/Xindi_incident)

History class took his end. Naomi had to proceed with maths, which I couldn’t take yet. So I decided to visit my pet slug. I had been distracted by his presence since we had captured him. He was clearly a male carrying the name Kody (yes I gave him a name). So at night, I sneaked down the halls and joined him in his little prison. I snuggled up in a blanket and kept him company. His lack of attention in his previous life was really obvious. He had never been loved before. This track dog was trained with a pack and therefor threated so. Kody had been distant at first, but as he became more hungry for the energy, and also for the attention I gave him while feeding him, he started to trust me more. Also, he helped me to bring back some memories about the ship where I had been kept captive. Every time I had a flashback, I wrote a report and gave it to Tuvok, who handed it over to the captain. It hadn’t been helpful so far.
Now I visited Kody at daytime and he seemed to have dozed off in a stand-by modus. Patiently I sat down next to the jellyfish-like creature and carefully petted his mucus skin. Kody was completely transparent and when you touched him, a pulse of static energy shot through your arm. I had adjusted to this unpleasant feeling. It was a part of me, just like my period once a month.
I sat there for a while and enjoyed the silence alone with the only thing that connected me with some lost memories. It allowed me to reflect about the past few days. How did I stay so calm? I’ve lost my entire family, probably no one left to call ‘family’ at all. Tears shot in my eyes, that letter to my mom, I had written it… but I would never send it. How was I able to accept all these new realities? It was some sort of instinct guiding me through technology. I picked up some unusual habits too, such as not touching food with my hands when Vorik ate with me or even giving way to superiors in the hall.
The door slid open and Harry Kim appeared. He was distracted by a tablet in his hands and when he saw me next to Kody, he hesitated to enter.
“How is your project going?” I asked ,”Did Icheb and you manage to enforce the shields?”
He could no longer escape me now. Harry entered and answered my questions.
“Almost, we only need a few more details about the vibration speed in the membrane. I’m here to make a few more scans.”
“On your own?”
“I’m not afraid of… Kody. He is actually really passive. Not aggressive at all.”
I smiled and petted him once more, which caused him to wake up and scan the environment. After that, he stopped moving and waited for instructions, my instructions. Even though he had no eyes I could sense its gaze.

Suddenly, I could remember a cage. There were no bars, but something else. I think it was an energy field. I could hear distinct noises, clicking and zooming. It was a language, the pattern was very similar to music, but it didn’t sound melodic. It sounded threatening and I was scared.
I could remember my escape. I was running in large corridors, I was fleeing my way through a ship, sabotaging doors and alarm systems. I found an emergency pod and climbed in and then I saw these things, my captivators. Slimy creatures, twice as big as me, with a thin and transparent membrane to protect their organs. Their heart was in the middle of what was supposed to be their chest. It didn’t beat like a normal heart, it zoomed like a constant humming of electrical currents. They hovered towards me, no eyes in a flat skull, hissing and screeching. I escaped.


“Are you okay?” Harry asked me worried. He had come closer and bent over me.
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
I got up and watched as Harry took scans of Kody.
“This will do, I’m going to transfer the information in the computer now.”
I followed him out. He didn’t seem bothered, because he was so focused on his task, until we took the elevator. He cleared his throat a few times and told the computer the destination: “Machine room.”
After a moment of silence, me too, I cleared my throat.
“Harry, I need to tell you something.”
He looked genuinely concerned.
“That day when they found me, I…”
“Let’s forget about that day.”
“That’s not my point, I…”
The elevator stuttered and suddenly stopped. The power seemed to have been cut off. I could feel the atmosphere change now, Harry was not pleased. He pushed his communicator and said: “Harry Kim to machine room. The elevator blocked.”
“We now, we’re repairing the circuits between deck C and E. it will be fixed in a moment.”
Harry uncomfortably pulled his collar. Then he started to walk circles, later he started to whistle. He avoided eye contact and didn’t want to pick up the conversation.
“What I wanted to tell you,” I interrupted him, “is that I hid behind your sofa and that I was blind.”
“Oh, why…” he mumbled.
“I was blind, I didn’t see anything on a normal way.”
“But you saw me, didn’t you?”
“Not in the normal definition of seeing.”
“I didn’t even have my back turned to you. I’m really embarrassed, everyone on the ship is talking about it.”
He took a step to the panel, further away from me, and tried to manually fix the power.
“How can I make up to you, then?” I asked. He stopped trying and turned around.
I challenged him by saying: “What? You want to see me naked too? No Prob.”
I started to undo the buttons of my shirt when he stopped me: “No, it’s alright. That would be too much… Maybe… Tell me something embarrassing about yourself. Something that would make me feel better.”
I reflected for a moment.
“Alright. When I was ten years old, I accepted a challenge to walk into the teachers room. I ended up hiding in a closet. The closet was locked and could only be opened from the outside, so… they found me the next day, after having called the police and child services. It was really embarrassing.”
“That’s not as bad as…! Okay, maybe in the eyes of a child, but tell me something that, as an adult, makes me feel better.”
I took a deep breath, facing the consequences of my words: “Icheb and I accidently kissed on our first date, because I was blind. I missed his cheek.”
Now, he smiled.
“That’s what I call a good one.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Yeah sure.”
Then I laid my hand on the panel, fixed the circuits and sent the elevator on its way. The look on Harry’s face could best be describes as ‘How did she do that?!’
I didn’t know either.

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