The Bar Code Parody

Many years into the future, civilization has become fixated on a new piece of technology which allows the user to keep all of their information on their bare skin in the form of a barcode. Society has become so fixated on it that the ones that don't have one of the essential barcodes are deemed to fail in society, and just suck at life in general.
Sapphire Serenity, however, isn't phased about this technological advancement in the slightest and would rather remain an remarkable individual who happens to be the biggest outcast in her entire high school. But when things start turning for the worst, Sapphire has no other option, but to turn into one of the biggest Mary Sues in literature history.

Give credit to the original, The Barcode Tattoo by Suzanne Weyn.


6. After The Party

Entry #231

How's it going, mi fins? It's XxXBloodyGoffikMurderXxX ere. Ugh, mi lif has ben rly hell. 
On top of mi ded's unixpliend deaff an jist dis gineral depressin and bleekniss hoomans hav da audacity to refer to as lif. I didn't evin get to go to the latest My Toxic Lover conecrt which fukkin sux1! I fukkin h8 meh lif! I'm now gnna go n stilt mah writz 2 a Txic Loofa song an hpe to DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!


Sapphire pressed enter as her blog post was posted onto her really edgy Tumblr page that reflected her personality right down to the core. Her blog wasn't all that popular and only two people were subbed to her- Ferrizin ( who in turn runs her equally gothic blog but with better spellings ) and some weird goth chick off the internet. She looked really proud of it and decided a good snack was needed about now.
 She walks down the stairs as a scene straight out of a mediocre Lifetime Network Movie happened. Her mom was being a competent mom by smoking and drinking drugs in a way Sapphire had read out of an infamous anti-drug kid book years ago.
 Sapphire dug around the kitchen for a Monster Energy drink that she always drank around this time.
 "Mom, we ran out of ME." Her mom looks at her.
 "What the hell is an ME?" Milea questions deadpanly.
 "Monster. Energy." Saph punctuated to get her point across. "Its my dietary supplement and without it I just can't live."
Her mom didn't move and began speaking in a more raspy, elderly voice sort of like that of an old guy. "If you want a case so darn badly, just go to the dollar store and get some, you Sue."
Sapphire would not accept this fact. She began to throw a teenager tantrum.
"I waNT MY MONSTER ENERGY, MOM!" Sapphire screams.
Her mom then stood up immediately, looking really pissed off. "I DON'T GIVE A DARN IF IT PISSES YOU OFF, YOU CAN GO GET THE DRINK YOURSELF!"
 Sapphire only got really upset at not winning this argument and lets out an angery sound. "YOU'RE THE ABSOLUTE WORST, MOM! I'M RUNNING AWAY!"
And run away she did...... to Snoop's house.

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