『 A dream's reality 』


5. Believe or ignore


I jumped out of the bus, with a big smile spread across my face. I breathed in the fresh air as it brushed on my face. I looked at my house in front of me, a light colored blue house. It was a two floor house and the roof was made of light brown colored tile and the windows and door where outlined with white. I ran to the front door and sweetly said, "Hey dadda and dad!" Two men looked over at the front door. One had a pink apron with spatula at hand. His hair is black like coal with faded grey at the end of his tips. His eyes are dark black, with a look that'll make you think he'll kill you any second. He had a grey sweatshirt on with black shorts and had sandals. He isn't much of a "share my ideas with the world type of guy" but more like, "I only care about family not you" type of guy. I call him "Dadda".

"Welcome back." He gave me a small smile that he only shows to me and my other dad.

"Hello little sasa!" My other dad said. He was more of a outgoing type of gal. His hair was dark brown with a little bit of gold in his hair (Just like mine) his eyes were happy and loving with a huge smile. He had cute little pink slippers and was sitting down at the table with his computer at his side. I just call him dad. I threw my backpack on couch and walked over to dadda and give him a kiss on the cheek. He quickly turned the other way but I could see he was hiding a small smile. Then I went over to my dad and kissed him on the cheek too.

"So what are you cooking Dadda?" He looked slightly over. I sat on the table beside dad.

"Chicken and gravy with vegetables." He said. His voice is a little low but soft as silk.

"Mmm! I'm starving!" I said rubbing my tummy.

"So how was school?" Dad said. "Did you meet any cute boys? Tell me everything girlfriend."

"DAD!" I said laughing. "You tell me that every day!"

"I know. I just want to know you are looking for someone who will love you. It's just simply curiosity." He said with a teasing smile.

"Meh, that might not happen for a while." I said with a "I'm lonely for life" face. "For now.... I'm gonna pair up my friends together. Merlin and Jason."

"Ah. Playing Cupid I see." My dad said.

"Yup! I feel really bad for Jason. He has been chasing Merlin for years but, Merlin hasn't noticed any hints he has thrown at her." I said.

"Ah, playing hard to get." My dad said.

"No. More like, just plain clueless." I said with a hopeless face. We both giggled.

"Five more minutes and food be ready. You should change into your pijamas Sasa." Dadda said.

"Hehe, okay!" I jumped out of my seat and jogged up stairs. I opened my bedroom door which was at the end of the hall. My room was bright pinkish purple color with a white rug on the floor. My bed was on the corner of the room and blue. I had one cabinet that was dark brown at the other side of the room. I walked over to my desk beside my bed. It was filled with papers and books. I sat down and looked for my "research journal". This is not your normal research journal, it's my book of fantasies. I have some theory's about the world having magic or more like how it was born. It's mostly what all the religions have in common.

"There you are!" I said as I found it. I put it on my bed and went to my dresser to change. I put on a light blue tank top and put on a poco dot blue shorts. I opened my door and walked past my dads room. I stopped and walked back. The door was slightly open and the light was turned on. I have never seen my dads room open, especially when they know I'm home. I opened the door more and noticed that it was just a normal room. Nothing out of the ordinary. But there was a light pink present with a red bow on their bed. A birthday present? But, my birthday isn't for five more months. I slowly opened the door more wider.

"Sasa! Food is ready!" My dad screamed out. I jumped and closed the door as quietly as I could. I slowly walked down stairs and heard whispers.

"You left it open right?" My dad said.

"Yeah." My dada said. What did they leave open? They're door? I thought to myself.

"Good. We are telling her today no matter what." My dad said and Dada said nothing. I stood at the bottom of the stairs where they couldn't see me. I don't know why but my heart started to beat hard on my chest. I walked slowly back upstairs and walked to my dads room. I opened the door and yelled, "Hey dad! Your door is open!" I heard shuffling downstairs.

"Uh, can you please close it! Thanks!" My dad said. I did just that. I walked downstairs with loud footsteps and walked over to the kitchen.

"I put your plate on the table." Said Dadda.

"Thanks, Dadda." I said. I walked to my seat and sat down beside both of my dads. We sat quietly eating for awhile but my Dadda broke the silence.

"Sasa, we need to talk to you about something." He stared at me and I looked down on my plate.

"Really? Huh, that's odd. Usually dad is the one who brings up that phrase." I said with m a spoon on my mouth. "Hmmm..... Oh! Let me guess! Your going to lecture me about my fantasy problems!"

"Uh no, Sasha. We aren't going to talk about......that. We want to talk to you about your m-mom." My dad said. My eyes widened but I kept my cool.

"Oh..... mom! Don't worry dads! I pray for her every night! Even though... she passed..... I try to make small conversations hoping she can hear me." My mom died when I was little, my dad has ignored all my questions. Touché, I know, but that's how it's been.

"That's not exactly what we wanted to talk about. Remember the present you got for your birthday but I threw in the trash?" He said.

"Oh yeah, really hurt my feelings dad." I said innocently.

"Well, that present was from your..... mom." I choked on my food and quickly grabbed the water to swallow it. My hands started to tremble.

"But you said my mom was dead." I said in shock.

"No, she isn't..." he took a deep breath and dad looked at dadda. He just nodded. "When you were born, it was beautiful. Back then, I wasn't sure what I was doing and did things for no apparent reason. I got your mom pregnant even though later I found out I didn't like girls. I told your mom and she immediately started to cry. She said that she wanted US to be a family but I couldn't live knowing I wasn't me. So I told her to keep you and I'll disappear forever and she agreed. But things didn't go as planned. Months later, your mom fell really ill, she didn't want her condition to affect you so, she told me to take good care of you. Weeks after weeks went by and I never heard from her. That's when I thought she passed away. By that time I met "Dadda" and he helped me take care of you. When you were eight your mom came to visit us while you were at school. She told me that after two years she got better health. She asked how you were and I said okay. She told me if she could ever see her again. I was very foolish back then and told her that you believed she was dead and that I couldn't explain why you were living. Those words struck her in her heart. So she told me that every birthday she send you a present until she will meet you." I felt warmth in my eyes and then in my cheeks. I was stunned and sad and happy. So many emotions crossed through me.

"W-why would you say that?" I said. "You would lie to your daughter knowing that I wanted a mother for so long?" I was starting to cry harder but I tried to control it.

"Last year, your mother sent a gift and a card. I read the card and wrote something that made me rethink everything." Dad reached into his pocket and took out crumbled envelope that was a cream color. He gave it to me, and without thinking I opened it. It read:

Dear, sweet Sasha

By the time you get this you'll be 15. You will have grown and hopefully found who you will be in live. I still remember the time I held you in my arms for the first time. You were a cute little potato. The nurses said you got your hair from your father but the face, you got from me. I'm sorry I wasn't with you for the first 15 years of your life. I fell ill and felt miserable but I never gave up, because I knew that one day I'd see you grow and become a changed woman. It must've been hard grow without a mom, and again I'm sorry. Sometimes I imagine myself cooking food with you and laughing together. Or comforting you after a bad day. I bet we could have gotten along so well. I may not be there with you, by your side when you need me the most but remember this, I will always believe in you, no matter what you do. I think about you everyday and wish you for the very best. I love you Sasha I always will.

                         Happy birthday from,


I began to tear up and hugged the letter to my chest. That's all I ever dreamed of, to hear from my mom even if she wasn't here with me.

"Sasha I-" he began to comfort me but I sat up and ran upstairs and went to straight to my dads room. I stopped in front of their door and slowly started to open it. I walked inside and headed for the present. My hands began to shake as I got closer. I reached for the present and slowly began to untie the bow. I took off the lid and inside was a pretty knitted scarf. It was blue and had patterns weird patterns on it. There was a note that said,

Take this scarf I made for you and every time you wear it, I hope you think of me.

I put the note aside and gently took out the scarf. I studied it and put it around my neck. Both of my dads were standing on the door.

"Sasha, I know your mad right now and I know you'll never forgive me but, I promise I was trying to protect yo-" I began to sob and laugh at the same time.

"What are you talking about? I'm so happy!" I said as tears of joy rolled down my checks like waterfalls.

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