The event changed everything, but a story can’t have a central theme unless there are walls to support it, roads that take you there and on, because I can’t just give you a fact and you understand it fully until I explain it. So here it is; I love Harry Styles, but the roads that I take you on to understand may not be one’s that you really want to travel, so heed the signs on the barren roadsides, and understand. I’ll tell you about the days, thirty before and thirty after, encompassing Harry’s attempted suicide.


2. intro 2


harry tried to commit suicide the night of my birthday, i wasn't sure at first about the reasoning behind it, if maybe he didn't want anything else good to happen, or he just wanted to go,but i feel so fucking stupid now.

while i was asleep in  a hotel bed, he was drowning himself in a bottle of pills.

i wasn't sure who was more selfish.

Harry, for trying to remove himself from our lives without an explanation,or me, for wishing that he could of just waited a little bit longer for me to wake properly, so i could help him quicker and better.

but i guess that defeats the whole purpose of suicide,doesn't it?

however, we did have a warning flare before the night, there was an instance where we should have known, but we simply assumed that he would get better

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