Eucatastrophe ~ h.s.

This isn't how I planned any aspect of my life to occur.

The plan was simple: Finish university with a 4.0 GPA, Get a well-paying corporate job that's more intense than the assistant job I've now, Find a man that loves me for me, Get married at a gorgeous ceremony, Have beautiful children, Grow old with the man of my dreams and watch our kids mature right before our eyes, and Then fall deeper and deeper in love with our time together.

That Night wasn't supposed to happen. My life wasn't supposed to turn out like this.

*Contains: Language, mild sexual content, and a bit of violence. Content could be triggering for some.*


50. ✗ forty-eight ✗


✗ A/N: I want to know where all my lovely readers are from!!! Comment here and tell me where you're from! Also, I want to see the most commenting on this chapter as opposed to all the other chapters! Vocalize your reactions and such throughout the chappie, maybe I'll upload early again if there's a lot of comments. Your comments honestly make my day. BTW: Who is ready for a cheeky scene???? ✗


28 August

"Are you ready?" He asks, as we stand fully clothed before the running shower.

I've checked the water temperature three times in the amount of time we've just been stood here. It's cool, not too cold to freeze us both, but not hot enough to raise Harry's temperature anymore. I haven't brought myself to help Harry start undressing or even make a move to undress myself.

"Yes." I breathe out as I turn to face Harry.

He's taken a seat on the edge of the tub beside the shower. With a soft, but sad, smile he slowly stands to his feet and grabs onto my shoulder for balance. I know how dizzy he's feeling right now, so it's a good thing I'm here.

Ever so slowly Harry looks me up and down before grabbing the hem of my loose t-shirt, even in his state he's helping me out. He grips the hem and slowly drags it off my body as I raise my hands with it. My hands fall in front of my bare chest as Harry tosses my shirt to the ground. My eyes can't seem to focus on Harry, no matter how hard I try they're trained on the bump that resides on my person.

"Don't cover yourself up." He rasps, running his hands down my shoulders to my arms before taking my hands in his.

"Don't laugh."

"Why would I laugh? You're stunning?" I stare up at him and wait. "I wouldn't laugh, Shay, I promise."

The sound of his voice pains me, his throat remaining incredibly scratchy, even with the cough drop in his mouth. His hands lower my own hands from my chest until they're no longer covering the unseen skin. Harry swallows hard as my eyes leave my stomach and find his butterfly tattoo.

"You're beautiful, love."

My cheeks heat up as his hands slide from mine and find my hips.

With one push of his hands my cotton shorts are pooled at my feet, leaving me in only a pair of black lace knickers. I shiver at the cool sensation I feel standing almost bare and raise my hands to Harry's bare chest, gliding my fingertips along the glistening skin. I know he needs to get in the shower, but I can't find it in me to move a muscle.

"We can stay just like this if you'd be more comfortable." Harry offers, hooking his finger underneath my chin and tilting my head up towards him.

Our eyes meet and a smile comes naturally to my lips. Even in his sick state he still looks as beautiful as ever, perfect even. I shake my head, making the final decision to let him see me bare.

In that decision I had forgotten that it would mean I seeing him bare as well. As his hands left my hips and hooked under his own briefs I swallow hard. He pushes them to the ground and my eyes shut as if I'm not meant to see Harry in his own naked glory. I count backwards from five in my head before gathering the courage to open my eyes.

My mouth falls open at the sight of him. I've seen a penis before, many times actually in my party days. I've performed oral for a man in a drunken state, but never have I been so... impressed, turned on, or even comfortable around someone's manhood.

"You okay?" I nod my head, my eyes still taking in the size of him.

"I'm fine." I say, nodding my head to go along with my words. Harry's hands meet the band of my knickers and he makes a move to remove them but I stop him by grabbing his hands. "I have to tell you something." I say, my breathing heavy.

Men have seen me in the nude before, shamelessly in the time of my life when I was off my rocker. I had no self-respect, so what was showing off my body and gaining some pleasure in return? But, I had yet to allow just anyone see me completely bare with the lights on and in such an intimate situation. I had also not allowed anyone, aside from a doctor; see me bare since the incident.

"If you want to leave them on, Shay, you-"

"I'm a virgin." I spill out, causing Harry to fall silent as my eyes rake up his body to his flushed face. I bit my lip and shrug. "Well, I was, before this." I say, placing my hands on top of my stomach as I swallow hard.

I can feel tears threatening to spill, but I hold them back, hoping this once I can speak a heavy conversation without crying.


"I don't know why I've just told you that, we're not even going to be doing anything other than showering. I just thought I should tell you, why now is a great question though." I say, chuckling lightly to myself in hopes of lightening the mood. "I mean I've done things before, but never allowed myself to go all the way with someone. I didn't want some rich bastard to take the thing that I held to dearly to myself. I wanted to save it for someone special, someone that I could call all mine and someone that I loved dearly. Call me old fashioned, but I did. I guess I just thought you should know."

"I love you." Harry breathes out, causing me to snap my head in his direction. It was as if it were the first time he had said those words to me. "I've always loved you, but knowing that, God, I don't know just makes me love you more." He says. "There's nothing wrong with that and I'm happy you told me. I'm sorry you couldn't fulfill your wishes on the matter."

I simply nod my head as I frown at the floor.

"You can take them off." I say with a shaky breath.

"Are you sure?"

I lift my head and send Harry a small smile before standing on my tiptoes and kissing his cheek. There's no way I'm kissing that mouth after he's vomited.

"Positive; 100%."

With one last nod of encouragement, Harry's hands slide the lace material down my legs until they're pooled with my shorts. I step out of them both and slowly bring my head up to look at Harry's face. He visibly gulps as his eyes rake me up and down before a grin takes over his features.


"God, you're gorgeous. I'm feeling much better now." He rasps out.

I laugh lightly and shake his head before reaching my hand out for Harry to take. He takes ahold of it and the two of us step into the shower. I hiss at the temperature and immediately start shaking. Harry steps underneath the stream of water, a sigh leaving his lips as the sweat on his skin gets washed away. His head sticks underneath the water, drenching his curls. With his free hand he runs his fingers through his hair to get the strands out of his face.

I simply stand to the side and watch him, my heart racing in my chest. My eyes take in the look of Harry's glistening body and drenched hair and I know I'm done for. I bite my lip harshly to keep my emotions and urges at bay. Usually I'd be able to hold onto myself and keep my body in check, but with all the pregnancy hormones rushing throughout my being, I'm struggling. When my eyes take in his lower half I suck in a breath and curse myself for feeling the way that I do in the moment.

"Are you, uh, feeling better?" I ask once I've taken a couple of calming deep breaths.

"Actually, yes." Harry breathes out, his lips barely moving as the water cascades down his body. He looks to me at his side as I stand with an arm crossed over my cold body and my other hand still in his. "You're shivering."

"You need to cool down, don't bother about me."

"But you're teeth are chattering." He points out and I, for the first time, take in the chattering of my own teeth against each other.

"I'm fine."

Harry shakes his head before pulling me into his body and wrapping his arms around me. His warm, toned body rests against mine, his body heat radiating onto my own body, warming me up. He holds me tight, our fronts pressed against each other. I can feel his bulge against my thigh and it takes everything in me not to begin kissing him and rubbing up against him until I've found relief.

"Thank you." I stutter out, feeling warmer by the minute, partially because of the thoughts in my head and partially by the body heat.

I pull from Harry with a soft chuckle at the temptation. It'd be so easy for me to reach out and touch him, every part of him, but I can't and won't. I'm so out of practice it's not even funny and Harry doesn't have the strength to stand what I can do to him.

I grab some soap from the holder and place it in my hands, rubbing them together until they're all soapy. My hands hesitantly reach out and touch Harry's chest, washing him with smooth, rounding motions. My hands run all over his wet body from his shoulders to his hips. My eyes take in every single tattoo that litters his skin. My hands stop at his lower stomach when I feel the muscles there tighten. I swallow nervously and go to remove my hands but Harry grabs them in his.

"You have no idea what you're doing to me." He utters breathlessly.

I bite my lip as I take a peak at his friend, my lips trying to fight off the smile that wants to form.

"I've a bit of an idea."

"Maybe I should-"

"Yeah." I say, handing him the bottle of soap from the holder as I turn and stand underneath the water in hopes of cooling my, now, overheating body.

My chest rises and falls heavily at the thought of all the tings that we could do in this shower, none of them appropriate in the least. My head rests against the marble exterior of the shower as the water rushes through my golden hair.

"You okay?" Harry's voice startles me, especially when his hand comes into contact with my shoulder.

"Yep, I'm great."

"You're breathing heavy." He points out and I simply shake him off, stepping out from under the water so that he can rinse his body. "Don't tell me..." Harry utters and I can hear the smirk on his lips, if possible. I lift my eyes to his face to see that it has regained some colour back, but he still looks ill.

"No need to rub it in." I say, having a feeling Harry already knows. "It's not my fault my libido is very high during this time. Plus, you standing here with your toned body and perfectly trimmed lower half is not helping in the least."

"Let me help you out then." I gulp and shake my head.

As turned on as I am right now, there's no way I'm going to have this therapeutic shower turn into some hot makeout session with hands roaming each other's naked bodies until I'm unable to move.

"We should just go to bed, think that's best." I say, scratching my head as I walk towards the exit of the shower and pick up one of the towels I had set out.

I wrap it around my body and ring my hair out afterwards. Harry cuts the water and joins me as I hand him a towel of his own.

I can feel Harry's eyes on me as I take off out of the bathroom towards the wardrobe in our shared room. I shuffle through the neat clothing items, pulling on a pair of pink knickers and sliding them up underneath my towel. I finish getting dressed in my sleep shorts and t-shirt from earlier before wrapping the towel around my hair to dry it a bit before climbing back into bed.

"You know, if you ever need some relief, you just let me know Shay." Harry says to me from his place on the edge of the bed. "I can help."

"I know you can."

"You seem freaked out. Did I do something?" I shake my head and walk around the bed.

I need to change the sheets and throw the dirty ones in the laundry before morning. I'm in the midst of untucking the dirty linens when Harry comes up behind me and wraps his strong arms around my torso. "Talk to me Shay."

"You didn't do anything wrong, okay? I just let my urges get the best of my judgment. You're not feeling well and there I was struggling to get a hold on my emotions. Haven't seen a naked man in a very long time, just kind of sent me into a frenzy."

"There's no need to apologize, love." I nod my head and continue to remove the sheets and throw them in a pile on the floor. The clock on the bedside table reads four in the morning now and I'm feeling the exhaustion taking over. I gather new sheets from the cupboards and begin making the bed once again. "I'm actually feeling a lot better now, what with the medication, your tender touch, and your Goddess like body."

"Stop." I warn whilst picking the dirty linens up off the ground. Harry watches me as I move about the room, gathering the dirty clothes and linens to take to the laundry downstairs. "I'm going to place these in the wash and get you a cuppa, do you want anything else? Toast or some biscuits perhaps?"

"You don't have to do that Shay, I really just want to cuddle up in bed with you."

"Give me ten minutes."


The buzzing from Harry's phone on the side table in the lounge takes our attention from the Jamie Oliver special before us. Since crawling back into bed around half four in the morning, we slept until ten and then I made a light brunch and now we've been sitting here watching the telly. Our phones have remained off since yesterday, but I suppose Harry's turned his back on since I won't let him go into work. It's Sunday for Christ's sake.

"Who is it?" I ponder, resting my head back against the sofa. Harry sighs and shows the caller id to me. "Louis might actually need something Harry." I say.

Since yesterday the boy has called around ten times, he'd called twice before we shut the phones off and woke to the other eight this morning. "He could be in trouble."

"Probably can't get rid of a girl the morning after to save his life." Harry mumbles before answering the call. "Hello Louis- whoa, slow down. What?"

I sit straight at the tone of Harry's voice and the way he sits up straight. I can't hear what Louis' telling him on the other line but from the look on his face, it can't be good.

"No, we moved house yesterday, so you were knocking on the door of an empty place, mate." Harry pauses and I watch as his eyes widen before shooting in the direction of my stomach. "When did you find out? Yesterday? Is that why you were calling?" Harry says with a clenched jaw. "Of course she doesn't know. How would she know if I didn't?"

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"Alright, what channel?" Harry asks, plainly ignoring my question as he picks the remote up off the coffee table. Harry mumbles something before turning it to the news station.

My eyes fit to the screen as a photograph of Harry and I from my birthday appears up on the screen beside a dark skinned woman wearing a red dress. I gulp, reading the title of the fit on the bottom of the screen.

"Baby news is in the air for heartthrob CEO, Harry Styles. It is rumored that Mr. Styles, once the hottest bachelor in the city of London, is expecting his first child with his current assistant and girlfriend, Shay Nichols. The two were seen entering the French restaurant Clos Maggiore hand in hand Friday night to join a group of friends for the twenty-second birthday of Ms. Nichols. A patron of the restaurant, whom has requested to stay anonymous, says that the couple made the announcement after dinner! He's quoted as saying, 'Mr. Styles and the bird seem very happy. She announced to their friend group that she is in fact pregnant and the look on Mr. Styles' face said it all.' Said it all huh? We took a look at the photos taken just hours before the announcement and could this be a baby bump?"

A series of photographs of Harry and I walking hand in hand towards the restaurant show up next to the woman on the screen. My dress is blown tight round my small bump because of the force of breeze and getting caught against all the people. My heart drops that our secret is no longer a secret, everybody in the media world knows.

"Either way, all of here on This Week in News congratulate the couple on their splendid news. More on the Styles baby rumor coming up after these short messages..."

I watch Harry out of the corner of my eye, his grip on his phone tightening significantly as a deep frown takes over his features. I drop my eyes to my lap as my hands go to cover my stomach, shallow breaths leaving my parted lips.

This can't be happening, I think as I try and take deep breaths to keep from freaking out. I thought we still had a few more weeks before the news would be out in the public. We were planning on keeping it to ourselves for as long as possible, until I couldn't hide it any longer. It's my fault that the media knows; I wanted to announce the news to our friends on my birthday. We were in public; it was a risky move on my part.

"I have to go." Harry mutters.

I don't look at him, but I hear his phone slam onto the coffee table surface before he gets to his feet and rushes up the wooden steps. I feel the tears burn the edges of my eyes as I listen to him go, his footsteps carrying towards our bedroom.

I have to take the blame for this, no one else. Harry wanted us to keep it from the media for safety reasons. He knew that once the news was out it'd be utter pandemonium. Photographers would want their shots, their judgment of proximity no longer a factor. They will pile outside Styles Inc. for a glimpse of us together and for a shot of the baby bump. This is what he's feared since finding out I'm pregnant. He feared it in Australia, in Holmes Chapel, even here at home.

I can't imagine how angry he is. But by the sounds of his stomping feet upstairs I can only imagine.

Slowly, I stand to my feet, my hands protectively on my stomach as tears cascade down my cheeks. I make my way upstairs at a slow pace, unable to get my feet to move quicker. The tears are falling full force now as my throat tightens and my breathing accelerates. I make it to the next level with shaking knees and hands.

Harry's in our bedroom, pacing whilst his hands tear through his curly locks, pulling harshly at the strands. His head is bowed down, hidden from my view. I can see his chest rising and falling rapidly through my tear soaked vision. I know he's very angry, I've actually never seen him quite this worked up. So, I stand at the edge of the room just to be safe.

"I'm sorry." I croak out, my voice incredibly hoarse with the force I'm using to try to stop the tears.

Harry stops pacing in the middle of the room, craning his head up to look at me. He notices the tears streaming down my cheeks and immediately wipes the pissed look from his face. "This is all my fault. If I hadn't insisted on telling Gemma and Niall Friday this would have never happened. You probably hate me."

"Hey, Shay," Harry sighs and captures me in his arms as I continue to cry. He presses his lips to my hair as he holds me tight, rocking me back and forth, "I do not, nor could I ever, hate you. This is not your fault. People are too damn intrusive nowadays anyway." He wraps his arms tightly around me and shushes my cries as I continue to let the tears roll. "Love, please stop crying." He coos, pulling my face from his chest so he can look at my tears. He wipes them away with the pad of his thumbs before placing a kiss in the center of my forehead. "I can't stand to see your tears."

I suck in a deep breath and close my eyes, nuzzling my face into one of his hands as I try to get the tears to stop falling.

"We wanted to wait and you said it yourself, the paps will... they will hurt us!"

"I was just trying to get my point across, baby. They're not as bad as I've said; maybe I've been overreacting. But, love, I'll do anything to make you feel safer. I'll get more security, we'll use the side entrance at the office from now on; I will not let anything happen to you or this baby. I promise you Shay." I reopen my eyes after I feel the urge to cry completely disappear. "There's my girl." He says with a small grin.

"I'm still sorry."


"I can't." I say with a tiny smile. "I love you so much, Harry, so, so much. So much that it hurts."

Harry drops his hands from my cheeks and wraps them around my waist, pulling me into his body once again. I wrap my own arms around his neck and bury my face in the crook of his neck. I wish that he were healthy so that I could give him a kiss, but neither of us is risking it. Just being in this close proximity is pushing it.

"There's nothing I want more than to hear you say that."

"Then I'll say it again: I love you." Harry chuckles lightly before pressing a kiss to my shoulder.

"I love you too, Shay, forever and always." 

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