My thoughts.

I like my life, I like that I have a shoe obsession, I like that I have a lot of Spotify playlist, I like that I feel I was born in the wrong era. But yet I feel sadness on a daily basis. I binge watch 'story time' videos on YouTube to have some drama going on. I almost started crying because our house hold ran out of Classic chai tea. Btw I love to collect the quotes from the Yogi tea. So welcome to my mind! I hope you can catch up.


3. My fight

Breaking free was possible the best thing that ever happened to me. The last 4 weeks I've been living in a body that didn't want me to survive that didn't want me to recover. Last night something happened, I suddenly felt so alone and worse than ever. Honestly I thought I was going to kill myself, right from the start I thought that was the only way to break free from the deadly body, but if you are going through the same hell that I where then listen. Sudicide is not the way to break free! You just have to wait and take small steps at a time. Find a hobby, find someone to talk to, find any reason to stay and fight. Because the war will have to end sometime, there will come a point where you have battled all the Warriors and you'll win the war. I myself is not sure if I've won yet. Yesterday I had really bad sudicide thoughts, or some part of me had. The other part was holding on to life and fighting more than ever against itself. And I did the best thing I could, I reached out to someone. I messaged my best friend and I talked to an adult. And it helped. Now sometimes it comes back but I've been through a battle I can fight one more person. And I won't give up.

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