We are just friends.

But if we are then why do I feel funny when I see him?
Why do I want him to hold me?

If we are just friends then why did Calum say he loves me?


4. 4

Calum and I had finished the list of movies. At this point it was so late at night I didn't even know were I was.

"Hey Cal, I'm, gonna fall aslee..." I wasn't even able to finish my sentence.

I looked over to see that Calum was already sleeping. A small giggle came from within me, and I fell asleep soon after.


The next morning I woke up earlier then I thought I would.

It was 8 am but I felt really bad. Mentally.

I don't know what it was but I, I just wasn't right. I shook Calum awake.

"Hmm, what, what is it?" He asked waking up.

"Uh, I've gotta go home, my parents are leaving the house and, uh, they want me to be home." I lied.

"Oh okay, I'll walked you over." Calum said standing up.

"Thanks." I said.

Quickly I grabbed my stuff and walked over to Calum who was waiting for me. We walked out the door and over to my house, it was raining.

"Holy crap, I didn't know there was going to be a storm today." Calum called.

"Yeah, this came out of nowhere." I said.

We got to my house and stood on the porch.

"Thanks for walking me over, and having me over." I said.

"Nah, you don't need to thank me." Calum smiled. "Uh, well I'll see you later."

"Yeah, you too." I said, keeping it together.

I watched as Calum walked home, then I went inside. Part of what I told Calum was true, my parents really weren't home, but they never told me that I had to come home.

I dropped my bag on the floor and walked up to my room. The rain hammered my window. I didn't even make it to my bed before falling to the ground. I began gasping for air, and crawling to my bed.

"FUCKING HELL!" I screamed.

The lighting illuminating my room.

I was a mess. Tears pored out of my eyes, and I could hardly breath. My head was numb and my heart pounding.

"Shit, help me God, please." I sobbed.

I grabbed my phone and called Bex.

It seemed like it rang for am eternity, when she finally answered.

"Hello?" She sang.

"Bex, Bex... I... I." I gasped.

"Oh God, April, I'm on my way." She said, her mood changing immediately.

My phone slipped out of my hand and it the floor.

"Fuck, I'm fucking useless." I cried.

My body was still on the ground, a pool of tears forming around my head.

"Help me." I said with my last breath.



I drove to school. It felt like a good day, and I was looking forward to seeing everyone.

As I pulled up to the drive way I saw the boys in a group with Bex and Katie. I jumped out of my car and walked up to them.

"Hey guys." I said.

"What's up man." Luke said.

"Hey Cal." Michael said.

"Morning Calum." Katie said.

I looked around our little group, everyone was here, but, not April. Maybe she was just running late.


It was the same thing. April still wasn't here. She never showed up Monday either. Maybe she just has a little cold.


Still no April.


No April.



She still wasn't at school.

As I walked to lunch, I thought about her, and if she was okay. April had never been gone this long before.

I walked over to our table and sat down next to Michael and Bex.

They were all in a happy conversation about there plans this weekend. I just sat there and stared at the table

"Hey, Calum are you okay?" Michael asked.

"Calum?" Ashton questioned.

I looked up at Katie and Bex.

"Is April okay?" I asked.

Katie's eyes widened and she looked like she had a cold sweat. Then she looked over at Bex.

Bex looked me straight in the eye.

"She's just sick, that's all, she just has a bad cold. That's it." Bex said.

"O-okay." I said.

After school I ran home. Once I got there I called April.

She didn't answer.

I tried agin and again but still nothing.

I'll just go over there.

I walked across the street and to April's house.

I knocked two times and waited. April's mum answered the door.

"Oh Calum, what are you doing over?" She asked.

"Hi Mrs. Evens, can I see April?" I asked.

Her eyes widened.

"Um, well, she isn't..." I cut her off.

"Please, I need to know she's okay." I begged.

Mrs. Evens face lit up at the sound of my words, like she wanted April and I to be more than what we were.

"Okay then, she's in her room." She said.

I dashed up to Aprils room and quickly opened the door.

There was a light breeze do to her opened window. I looked around for her. She was in her bed looking up at the ceiling, her blue hair spread out everywhere.

"April?" I said.

She slowly looked over at me.

"Hey, how are you?" I asked.

"Why are you here?" She asked.

"Because, I came to check on you." I said.


"Cuz you have been gone all week, I was worried something was wrong with you." I said.

Right after I said that; April's eyes turned to daggers, like what I said was wrong.

"Go away." She hissed.

Well that hurt.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because I want to be alone." She said.

"Just leave." She said.

"April stop, I'm here for you, I understand." I said.

"No Calum you don't, you have no idea, NOW JUST GO AWAY!" She yelled.


Her eyes grew soft like she was seeing the most horrible thing in the world. Like what I said had just ruined her.

"I... I... I HATE YOU CALUM HOOD." She screamed.


It was like she had just stabbed me in the gut. My best friend. Someone I really cared about. How could she say that. I just wanted to help her out.

"Fine." I said.

I ran out of her room and all the way back to my house. I went up to my room and slammed the door shut.

"AHHHHH!" I screamed.


Tears ran down my cheeks as footsteps grew closer to my door.


I watched Calum run out of my room.

My breath rolled out of my chest.

I screamed at the top of my lungs and grabbed my glass bottle and threw it at the wall. It smashed, making me crave to throw another.

My mum came running up the steps and into my room. She rushed over to me and took my into her arms.

"Mum!" I cried.

"I know, I know." She said running her fingers thew my hair.

"I, I can't breath." I said gasping.

"Okay, just sit back, I'll go get some water and your meds, okay you just relax." She cooed.

My mum walked out to go get what she needed.  I went back to staring at the ceiling. I thought about what Calum had said.


I closed my eyes letting the water rush to the sides of my face while the breeze brushed along my skin.

I should have told him way back when. I'm sorry Calum.

I don't want anything to be wrong with me.

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