invisible // muke

"You've made me feel so much happiness and I don't want to ever leave that happiness." It's March 22, 2013; our one month. A moment I'll cherish forever and a moment I'll never forget.

There are mentions of self harm, suicide, abuse, and depression. If you have any of these problems and just need someone to talk to, my inbox is always open ❤️


8. guts // all time low

I pace back and fourth in the basement at Ashton's house. The only person not here yet is Michael which is a good thing. Let's just say, the rest of that night when he stayed the night for the first time, well, I sorta fell for him. And man did I fall hard. And I swear, he was falling for me also. We spent most of the night playing fifa and he kept leaning on me to mess me up. We eventually ended up sitting to where he was practically in my lap and I had my chin on his shoulder. When I woke up the next morning, we were really close to each other and I guess you could say cuddling. And the thing about it, it wasn't awkward at all the next day or when he woke up. We actually stayed like that for a while after we woke up because we were too lazy to actually get out of bed and embrace my cold room. It's now been two months and school has started again. Michael is in a few of my classes which is a good thing and I'm glad. I'm also glad that we have Ashton as our upperclassmen friend. You have to have at least one or you're practically looked down upon at this school. Well, of course, our school's homecoming dance is coming up. And I am so nervous and that is exactly why I am still pacing. I'm stopped by Ashton, who grabs my shoulders, turning me around.
"Get it together, mate!" He says, shaking me a little.
"Can we figure this out before Michael gets here?" I say quickly.
"Luke. Calm yourself. He isn't coming over today. He's sick." Calum says from sitting on the couch. I put my hand on my chest, pouting.
"Aw, my poor Mikey is sick." I frown. Ashton lets go of my shoulders to just give himself a facepalm. "What?!" I whine.
"Okay, so, when do you plan on asking him?" Ashton asks.
"Whenever I get the guts to." I smile uneasily.
"How about today? You can surprise him. He has a cold and just feels terrible. He's already asked me to get him food and medicine and cough drops. It's that bad." Calum laughs. 
"Alright. How about that could be how you ask him and that way we get four things out of it." Ashton grins.
"Why four?" I say confused.
"One, you can stop pacing. Two, he'll stop texting Calum. Three, you'll get an answer. And four, Michael will feel better."
"Lets go to the store?" Calum asks. We all agree and go get the essentials for me to ask him to homecoming while helping his sickness. We get a pack of colorful permanent markers and some poster board, some chicken noodle soup, cough drops, medicine to help him sleep better, and some Gatorade. We go back to the car and decide to make the poster before we drive over to Michael's. We almost lost all of the markers in the process. The poster says "I'm going to stop being a chicken and ask you to homecoming. So please stop being sick and go to homecoming with me?" and it has a box to check yes and to check no. We put everything back into the car and put the bags of stuff into a cloth bag. When we get to Michael's, I practically pass out from hyperventilation. 
"You are never any help." Ashton groans, rolling his eyes at me freaking out.
"You'll be fine, Luke. He'll say yes. I know him well enough. And let's be honest, he talks about you as much as you talk about him." Calum smiles at me. "And at least you'll be answering the door to him because his mum doesn't get home from work until 6 and his dad is on a small business trip." I take a deep breath and get out of the car with everything.
"I'm going to do this!" I say, trying to make myself confident. I walk up to his door, knocking on it. I look down at my feet and then hear the door being unlocked and opened. I look up and I'm faced with a pale, red nosed, Michael. He was still in is pj's and really looked pretty sick. A smile forms on his face as he reads the poster which makes me smile. He writes something down on a note pad that I just noticed was in his hands. I look up to see what it says.
"Do you have a marker to mark which one I answer? All I have is this pencil and my throat hurts too much to talk." I nod and pull the marker out of the bag. He opens the marker, making a huge 'X' on the yes box. He just smiles and I smile even more. I look back at the car, giving them a thumbs up. They roll down the windows and start cheering and screaming from excitement. Michael laughs, but then starts coughing. I walk in, pushing him into the house so he wasn't outside.
"Alright, let's get you back into bed." I say, setting the poster with my shoes. I go into the kitchen and set the bag on the counter, getting out everything we bought at the store. Michael had followed me and sat in the chair next to where I was standing. I groan. "Go back to bed, silly." I laugh a little and he pouts, writing down something quickly. 
"Can I have a kiss on the cheek?" He pouts more. I smile, kissing his forehead.
"I'm not getting sick and your forehead is farthest away from getting sick, yet it's still cute." I grin. He smiles, making his way upstairs. I set everything up to make his chicken noodle soup, which is luckily microwaveable and all I need to do is add some water. If I tried cooking, I'd burn something. I finish his soup, making my first trip upstairs to his room. He's sitting in bed on his phone. I set his bowl of soup on his desk to set up the tray in front of him. I then set the bowl on the tray. "I will be right back." I smile, going back downstairs to pour him a cup of the gatorade over ice and grabbed everything else so it was up in his room. I set the drink on his bed side table along with the medicine and cough drops. I sit on the edge of his bed. He frowns, his soup not even touched yet.
"My tummy hurts a little." He says at a whisper so it wasn't straining his voice. I frown
"Do you want to try sipping on some Gatorade? I'll go downstairs and get a straw." I ask. He nods, smiling weakly. I go downstairs quickly, grabbing a straw and then going back up. I put the straw in his drink and hand it to him carefully. He sips on it, smiling at me. I put the back of my hand on his forehead and frown. "I should have gotten cold medicine. I mean. I guess this is cold medicine." I say as I pick up the bottle and it says it's for colds, but it's technically going to just make him drowsy. Which is a good thing, I guess. I don't know anything about medicine at all. "Do you want to take some now or wait until you've gotten something in your stomach?"
"I'll wait." He whispers again. I put down the bottle and pick up the spoon, only putting the broth on it. I don't put a lot, but I cool it off for him, bringing it to his lips. He takes the spoon full. He smiles. "Thank you for doing this. You didn't have to."
"But I wanted to." I smile, continuing to give him just the broth until he takes the spoon from my hand to start feeding himself. When he finishes his soup, I give him some medicine and he lays down to sleep. I move the hair from his face, smiling. "I'll be downstairs if you need anything. Just text me if you don't feel like getting up." I grin. He nods, smiling. I kiss his temple, grabbing the empty bowl, going back downstairs. I'm starting to really like him and I wonder if he said yes because he likes me too. Clearly the kissing on his forehead was just a display of caring for him. Soon enough, his mum gets home, wondering why I'm over. I told her the whole story and she thought it was cute and she really thinks we'll end up together eventually. I could only hope so.

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