invisible // muke

"You've made me feel so much happiness and I don't want to ever leave that happiness." It's March 22, 2013; our one month. A moment I'll cherish forever and a moment I'll never forget.

There are mentions of self harm, suicide, abuse, and depression. If you have any of these problems and just need someone to talk to, my inbox is always open ❤️


30. dear daughter // halestorm

"Hey, you might want to have a talk with Madi when we get home. She won't talk to me at all." Michael says while I'm holding the phone to my ear with my shoulder while folding laundry and watching Alex. I sigh.
"Alright. I'll see you when you get home. I love you." I say, moving the phone to my other ear.
"I love you too." He replies, hanging up. I finish the laundry, setting the basket aside, sitting there listening to the Wonder Pets theme song for the fifth time as Alex sings along.

"Hey, sweetheart. What's wrong?" I ask Madi as she's hugging me tightly and crying.
"Daddy, they make fun of me." She sobs out.
"Who? The kids at school?" I ask, making her look at me as I'm kneeling down at her level. She nods.
"So we had gone around in a circle saying our names and something about us like how many brothers and sisters we had and then something cool. Well I told them that I have a little brother named Alex who's two and then I said that I have two dads." She sniffles, wiping her tears with the back of her hand.
"Aw, sweetheart. Listen to me. Those kids mean nothing. It's okay to be different. It's okay to have two dads. Don't listen to them. Just tell them your two dads are in a really famous band and that makes them cool. Okay?" I ask and she nods, sniffling again. "Tell them that we play our really cool guitars and we are really cool, okay?" She nods again. I smile. "Okay, give me a hug." I say, holding out my arms. I squeeze her gently and then she moves away, still wiping her tears. "Now give me a kiss." I pucker my lips and she gives me a quick kiss. "Now smile before the tickle monster has to make you smile." I laugh. She giggles.
"No!! Please! Not the tickle monster, Daddy!" She squeals as I grab her and start tickling her. She has her giggle fit as she tries squirming from my loose grip. I stop tickling her, giving her a hug. "I love you, Daddy."
"I love you too, sweetheart." I grin. "Now go play with your brother while I talk to your dad." I smile, gently pushing her towards the living room as Michael and I stand in the kitchen. Michael smiles at me.
"You're such a great father to our kids." He smiles, walking to me and giving me a quick kiss. "I love you a lot, you know." He smiles as he holds me close to him. I nod. 
"I know." I sigh. I pull back from him so I could see his face. I frown at the color of his eyes. They were that dim green that they were back in year 9. "Michael..." I mumble.
"Luke." He pauses, sighing. "I know." He pauses again, tears starting to trickle down his cheeks. He holds onto me tightly, his face buried in the crevice between my neck and shoulder. He sobs, leaving my shirt soaked where his face was. I rub his back. "I miss her so much already, Luke." He mumbles, keeping me close for comfort. About a year ago we found out that his mum got cancer. His step father called him last night in the middle of the night saying that she was in the hospital. There was no way for us to drop everything and fly out to Sydney on the earliest flight they had. So Michael stayed up all night, waiting for news from his step dad. At 4:30 in the morning, he called and told us the bad news. She passed away this morning and Michael has had it rough all day. He's been really strong about it though. I just wish I could help him, but I can't. This will only make his depression so much worse and it scares me. It honestly scares me to death that he'll do something to himself. I keep him close to me, making sure he doesn't leave my side. I'm not letting him go. I won't ever let him leave.

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