A Merry Reika Christmas [Oneshot]

Just to say a very Merry Christmas for 2015!
Hope you enjoy this oneshot about how Reika celebrates her Christmas!


1. A Merry Reika Christmas


To anyone reading this, Merry Christmas and here's to another successful year of writing and fun!
Hope you enjoy this oneshot as much as I enjoyed writing it



"Have yourself...a Merry...Reika Christmas." I warbled, skipping around my room to find my Christmas outfit.

"Reika! Shut up, yeah?!" Deidara shouted through my door, banging on it loudly, "You don't even know the f****** words to that song, un!"

"Chill out, Dei-Dei! I'm just trying to get into the festive spirit! In case you hadn't noticed it is Christmas today!" I yelled back, scraping my hair vigorously into pigtails.

I heard Deidara groan, "Who gives a damn about Christmas anymore, un?"

My mouth dropped open at that forbidden remark, so I marched over to the door and swung it open viciously. I didn't realise Deidara was leaning against my door until he fell forwards and landed flat on his back on the floor. I looked down and raised an eyebrow at him.

"Me, surprisingly." I retorted, folding my arms.

Again, Deidara moaned loudly and looked up at me in scorn, until he discovered I was standing in only a bra and a pair of leggings. His eyes widened and he looked away quickly, scrambling to his feet and walking out the door again, but he stopped in the doorway and continued to talk, keeping his back to me.

"Does anyone else care about a crappy event, un?" he asked, his nose in the air slightly.

I bit my lip. He's got me... "Um..." I thought, tapping my chin with a manicured fingernail. I came out with the first name that came into my head, "Aya-chan!"

Deidara froze, and by the twitching of his shoulders I could tell he was trying to smother a laugh. "Aya? Are you serious, un?"

"Yup! She couldn't stop talking about it yesterday!"

"And yet she is probably still asleep, along with the rest of us."

"You know her. Too much tea and you can't wake her."

Deidara sighed, a smirk still on his face, "Ok, you win. But I'm still not convinced, yeah. Anyway, I'm going to get breakfast, so I'll leave you to it, yeah."

"Good idea. I need to get dressed before any perverts see me." That goes for you, Hidan. I grinned to myself and slammed the door shut, earning a loud sigh from next door. Konan's room. I woke her up as well.


I packed a bag full of presents, mistletoe and cards and stuffed it into my wardrobe. My plan for today was subtly give out my presents to the Akatsuki as quick as possible so me and Aya-chan can sneak out to Konoha. Nobody knows of my plan yet, even Aya, but she'll go along with it, and as long as nobody else finds out, then it shouldn't be a worry.

I mean...what's the worst that could happen?

Apart from being captured by any drips from Konoha and being tortured and/or executed...nothing really. My Inner Self browsed down the book she was holding and grinned smugly at me.

"Hm." I nodded once to myself, pleased, before adjusting my dress and Santa hat, "Not too difficult then." 

I made my outfit especially for today. It was pretty much a sexy Santa outfit with fluffy straps and hem and a black belt to sit on my hips. I wore it with my black sandals. I also made a matching one for Aya, but whether she'll wear it or not is a different story altogether. If push comes to shove I'll strip her down and put it on her myself.


It was ten o'clock and I managed to awaken the whole hideout with cheesy Christmas songs which I cranked up on the stereo and started dancing to.

"Reika, what the f*** is your problem?!" Hidan yelled, standing directly in front of me in his pyjamas, which only consisted of bottoms. 

I grinned flirtatiously and pushed him roughly, "Don't get so close, Hidan-san...I don't wanna smell your morning breath." that wasn't really what I meant, I just wanted to get my fingers on those finely defined abs of his.

"And I don't wanna hear your s***** music!" he snapped.

Behind me, Leader-sama turned down the stereo, but didn't turn it off completely, "Hidan." he glared at him. When Hidan turned to look at him, with a scowl on his face, he continued, sighing, "I promised Reika  that she could...celebrate Christmas...in return for her actually working with us during missions." he couldn't look Hidan in the eyes while he explained mine and his agreement.

"You...f******...what??" Hidan was gob smacked, for the first time I have ever seen.

"You heard." I grinned cheekily at him like the Cheshire cat, "Don't be such a Scrooge."

Deidara strolled in, "Yeah Hidan, un. Don't be such a...what's a Scrooge?" he was cradleing some cereal in one hand and waving a spoon at me.

"Scrooge? Duh! Have you not read 'A Christmas Carol'?" my eyes widened and my mouth dropped again.

"Surprisingly...no." Deidara replied.

I went to the basics, "Well, Ebenezer Scrooge was a rich guy who never spent money, or helped anyone but himself, He hates Christmas, because everyone is so happy, and he is all 'Oh woe is me' since his girlfriend broke up with him on Christmas and he wonders why everyone else should be happy at such a time and..."

"Do you really think anyone gives a f*** about poetry?" Hidan snapped.

"It's...literature...actually." I muttered slowly to him, exaggerating the 'l' in literature, putting on a posh, snobby accent.

"Same difference..."

"Not really."

"Y'know what? F*** this! I'm going to my room. Merry F****** Christmas everyone!" Hidan stormed off down the hall.

"HUMBUG!!!" I shouted after him, earning a middle finger sent my way.

I folded my arms and grinned victoriously, before turning the music up louder again and skipping around the room.

Pein sighed, "You really can't help yourself, can you?" he also left

That just left me and Deidara again.

"Ooh, Dei-Dei! Here you go!" I pulled out a wrapped box from the bag I left on the sofa and handed it to him.

He looked shocked, before putting his breakfast down and taking it from me eagerly, "Huh, thanks Reika-chan." his face lit up as he unwrapped the present. He pulled out the contents and examined it before smiling again. It was obviously a sculpture (and an explosive one at that) shaped into a bird, but one more graceful than one he would create.

"I finally made a bird!" I grinned widely at him, pleased with myself, clapping my hands together and jumping up and down, "And you don't have to keep it forever. We can blow it up together later!"

Deidara scoffed, but in a flattered way, turning the sculpture in his hands, "Not bad, Reika-chan, un. Sure, we can do that. And thanks again." his blue eyes sparkled almost childishly.

I stuck my tongue out a winked, "See? I can be nice to you...sometimes."

"Don't push it..."


Next task was to awaken Aya-chan. This would be fun. Aya is a good sleeper so it will be really hard to wake her up. I mean, if the music didn't wake her up, then I have no idea what could. Cautiously, I slipped into her room, placed her present on her bedside table and shook her gently.

"Aya-chan." I whispered, "Wakey wakey. It's Christmas!"

A groan sounded from her mouth.

Step two was the open the curtains and let the sunlight glare into the room. Aya screwed up her eyes and turned to her side.

Step three, pull off her duvet. It's rather bitter outside so she wouldn't last long. Especially since she only sleeps in shorts and a tank top. She screwed herself into a ball.

And now for step four...this wakes her up indefinitely. Step four, sit down. I leapt into the air, shouted, "Merry Christmas Aya-chan!" and sprawled out on top of her.

Aya groaned on impact, her eyes snapping open, and a lot of air escaped her mouth. There we go! 

"What is it, Reika?" Aya hissed, covering her eyes from the sun.

"We're heading out once you get dressed and we hand out presents to everyone." I explained, tossing her her dress.

She caught it in one hand and examined it, "I am not wearing this."

Here we go. "Oh come on Aya-chan! We're both wearing it, and I made it especially." I pouted at her, puppy eyes gazing into her green ones.

"I don't care." was her reply, before she lay down again.

"Oh no!" I grinned, pulling her back up, "Look...here." I handed her her present and she examined it closely. It was decorated in happy Santas and said 'Merry Christmas' a few hundred times across the cherry red paper.

She actually seemed intrigued for once as she gave me her gratitude and proceeded to unwrap the present delicately. Inside was a small pot with tea leaves in it. Her eyes lit up, "Is this spiced tea?" she asked, inhaling the contents deeply.

"Yep. Mainly cinnamon but there are others in there too." I grinned again, folding my arms triumphantly.

Aya actually smiled and whispered a thanks before looking down at the red dress she still had in her lap, and frowning again.

"I suppose you want me to wear this in return?"

"Um...that wasn't the plan, but if you are offering...?"

Aya rolled her eyes, the small smile playing her lips again.

"Go get whatever else you need to do sorted while I get dressed."

I gasped in shock and happiness before leaning forward and hugging Aya tightly round her waist and bounding out the door.


So the rest of the morning, I was handing out Christmas presents to the rest of the Akatsuki.

For Konan, I flourished her room in origami birds and butterflies, using my chakra to make them move.

For Sasori, I crafted a nutcracker out of wood. (I was so pleased with my work because a nutcracker is basically a puppet, but you obviously use it to crack nuts. He surprisingly liked it and even smiled)

For Tobi, I knitted a Christmas jumper with a broken Christmas cracker and the words 'I'm Crackers' across the top. It suits him so well.

For Zetsu, a venus fly trap with a note saying 'because it reminds me of you'.

For Kakuzu, I simply paid back an IOU.

For Itachi, a 'History of Kages' book, since I am fully aware he loves to study History in his spare time.

For Kisame, I simply went for giving him a supply of shrimp since I see him chowing on them all the time.

And finally, Leader-sama and Hidan I struggled with, so I snuck into their rooms while I was asleep, polished and sharpened their weapons and left a note saying 'Merry Christmas. You're welcome'.


Aya-chan had finally finished getting ready and when she came out of her room I squealed at how cute she looked.

"Aw, Aya-chaaaan! I knew you'd look good in it." I gripped her shoulders and jumped up and down happily.

Aya squirmed, "I dunno...I feel a little exposed..."

I stopped and frowned, "Just because you cover yourself up in your cloak all the time. Let your arms and legs have some air for once."

She sighed, but whipped her head round when she heard someone stooping down the stairs. By the sound of the grumbling it was Hidan. He stopped when he saw what we were wearing. He saw me earlier, so I bet he was more shocked at Aya wearing it.

"What the f*** are you wearing? You selling yourself today or something?" he raised an eyebrow.

Almost in the blink of an eye, three flaming shuriken embedded their way into his body. Aya was glaring at him subtly, her Sharingan blazing.

"Ow, you bitch! I was only kidding? F*** you!" he mooched into the kitchen.

"Now's our chance." I hissed, grabbing Aya's wrist and heading for the door.

I leapt forward into the trees, Aya closely in toe.

"Where exactly is it we are going?" Aya asked, catching up and running to my side.

I grinned, "A party." I replied, closing my eyes, "Obvi."

"A party? Where? Who's?"

"Mine. And it's in Konoha!"


"Yep! I invited the rookies, and a couple of others, to a Christmas party I had organised at that old conference room that no one goes to anymore. The invitations are literally just flyers posted through the invited guests' doors to make it look like some kind of charity event or something, so they have no idea who is hosting. Me!" I explained, "And I brought little gifts for everyone who attends."

I turned to Aya and realised she had her eyebrow raised at me, "That's a nice idea...but there is one flaw...they all know we are rogue."

"And that's why I play my flute, so they just remember us as being the sweet little rookies we once were before we left the village." I pulled out my katana and changed it into a flute, tapping Aya on the nose with it, "Once the party's over, they can have their memory back."

Aya sighed again, "You are bizarre. I hope you know that."

"Of course! It's one of my many qualities, Aya-chan."


The party ended up being really successful. I invited the rookies along with Team Guy (without their senseis for obvious reasons). At first they looked like they were going to kill me and Aya in a flash, until I pulled out my trusty flute and erased their memories. Then the party started just like any normal one would.

I handed out the presents to everyone (which mainly consisted of doll forms of the receiver), before turning on the music full blast.

Aya and Kaze, much to my surprise and horror, were actually getting on without any arguments or fights for once. I swear they even smiled and laughed a few times.

"So yeah. My perv of a brother got the final book in the 'Icha Icha Paradise' series, so he locked himself away for the whole day. Of course I had to escape before I hurled." Kaze explained, rolling her eyes.

"To be honest, I dunno what else you were expecting." Maria muttered, drinking some punch and folding her arms.

Kaze snorted, "That's the thing. I wasn't expecting anything else! He's a pervert, what do you expect?"

Me and Aya grinned and I added, "Bet you were glad I was hosting a surprise party, huh?"

Kaze screwed up her nose, "To be honest, I am not one for parties." Never would have guessed, "But what else is there to do, really?"

"Exactly!" I retorted.


The best bit of the party was waving the mistletoe at people. I am a very good cupid so I could tell who would make good couples. My most priceless act was in front of Kaze and Sasuke (who I was shocked actually turned up. I bet it was down to either Naruto's persuasion, or Sakura-bitches moaning). They were just talking in the corner of the room until I butted in, pouting at both of them.

"Hmm...? What's that behind your ear, Sasuke?" I pretended to reach behind Sasuke's ear and pulled out a sprig of mistletoe I had hidden in my palm. I then held it up and gasped, "When were you going to give that to Kaze?" I giggled, waving it above their heads. Then I fled from the two faces that glared daggers at me, chuckling triumphantly. Unfortunately there was no tinge of red on either of their cheeks...

"I'm gonna get another drink..." Kaze muttered after I left, and pretty much quick walked away from Sasuke. Maaaybbbe I did hit some sort of nerve there.

BUT there were blushes to go around with some of my other guests. That was mainly Hinata who went the reddest of all after I waved mistletoe above her and Naruto. I couldn't help but notice Maria when I did the same thing when she was with Shikamaru, but it wasn't as noticeable unfortunately. Of course I had to do it to Aya and Neji as well, but their response was simply turn in the opposite direction to each other and scowl. But as they headed in different directions they did turn back to chance a quick glance at each other.

"Oh Kiba-kuuuun!" I called out to MY crush who was busy stuffing his face at the buffet table.

"Mmph hmm...?" he replied, his cheeks full like a chipmunk.

I giggled and flaunted my way towards him, fluttering my eyelashes and smiling toothily at him, "How's the party?"

"Mmph..yeah...it's great." he replied, hastily swallowing the food in his mouth, trying to make it as subtle as possible.

A quick hiccup of a giggle bubbled in my throat as I leaned forward so I was mere inches from him. Kiba immediately went bright red.

"Uhh...are you...O...Ok?" he asked, leaning back, but the table was blocking his way.

"Of course! I wouldn't I be? I am here with my friends...and my," I poked him on the chest, "close friend."

He bit his lip and tensed, but I couldn't sense him wanting to escape.

"Oh? What's this?" I quickly frowned and reached into my hair which had a final stork of mistletoe on. I then gasped dramatically, "Ooh...well then." I grinned at him, "I guess I had better do what the tradition says." and without hesitation I gave him a quick peck on the lips and hopped back a few places.

The room had gone silent and some people had their mouths wide open, including Kiba, who I could only describe as a tomato.


"Ah..." I sighed, collapsing onto my bed, dressed in some fluffy pink pyjamas, "That party was amazing. In face...the WHOLE day was amazing!"

"Mm." Aya replied, sipping on her Christmas tea, "I guess it wasn't too much of a flop, apart from when Kaze pointed out the dress I was wearing."

"Oh come off it! You looked cute! Anyway, it's one day a year. ONE DAY where I can act like a kid and do what I want, spread happiness and give presents to people. I can't do that any other day really, can I?" I replied, sitting up again and grinning at Aya.

She looked at me in shock, "That's the most un-Reika thing that has ever come out of your mouth." she stood up and headed for the door. But she turned and smiled, "But it's definitely sweet. Thanks for today, Reika-chan. It was brilliant. Couldn't have done a better job of it."

"I know." I grinned, "But don't forget I am still human. I wanna have fun and make people happy too! That is...when I am in the mood. Tomorrow things will be back to normal, and I will wanna destroy Konoha again." I sighed, "But, I won't forget today. And any other Christmases yet to come."

Aya nodded, "See you tomorrow, bright and early for our next mission." she walked out the door and closed it gently behind her.

Smiling to myself, I pulled the covers up, turned to my side and looked at the framed photo on my bedside table. It's a group photo from the party today, everyone smiling (or just looking more cheerful than usual) and having fun. Some day...we will all be like that without the clashes...someday.

"Have yourself...a Merry...Reika Christmas."


*Next day*

"Reika! Get your lazy ass out of bed! We're on a mission to find the three-tails, yeah?!" Deidara banged on my door.

I groaned loudly, "Coming! Keep your bra on!"

"F*** you, Reika, un!" 

I smiled to myself, Here we go again.

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