High School Anxiety (A Dairy about Life)

My mind is different than yours and yours is different from the next but do we share how we all think about high school? Everything has been changed and everything is different.


1. Gemma's high school life

              I am a girl. Of course. I am in high school yeah. I hate this. I hate high school. High school is just a few years of nothing but dances people getting drunk and people getting high. I am not anyone. No one knows me or what my problem is. They just don't care. If they did well they would know my weakness I would hate that. 

              I am much different then everyone else. I am not someone who is a wallflower. I am not a slut. But I am just a girl that is a no one. I am not even there. Not until a teacher calls on me. Then all eyes on Gemma. I hate it. Well nothing is worse then the one thing i have. I have something that not a lot of people have. I have test anxiety. And I am in high school. Great just great.

                Tonight I have been up studying for a test I know i will fail. And I hate this. If I fail this test I will get held back. I don't want to be held back. I know that I will fail this test. I hate having to take them. I have studied til my head hurts and I am sleeping all day long but I still take that test. I know that I know all the answers. And yet I freak when I am taking the test. My mind goes num taking any test. I can't think while taking one. 

                  Tomorrow we have a test at the end of the day of course it just makes sense. But here's the thing. We also have a dance to night too. I hate those a lot less then test. I don't know why I even bother going to them all I do is sit around listen to the music and then go home. Ever one else there dances gets high and drunk and goes home with someone. Not me of course. I am the loner. But I better stop writing this down and get some sleep tonight and ready for the big test that I am going to fail.


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