Without Knowing

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1. prologue

Watching you die was the hardest part of my life. The light in your eyes slowly dimmed and I knew this was the final “goodbye”. I dug your grave and gently put your lifeless body into the ground. Letting you go with peace. I grabbed a piece of thick bark and carved your name into it. Everyone deserves a cheesy quote, right? I settled with a quote from your favorite movie: “Letting you walk away was the hardest thing I had to do”. I hope you’re doing alright in, maybe, cheap heaven, Claire. The wind seemed to pick up some speed. I pulled my jacket tighter even though I know it won’t officially protect me from the december air. They killed you because of me. I want to say it’s my fault but I did warn you about them and you stayed anyways. And now you’re dead. They’ll come after me soon enough. Killing you wasn’t enough for them.

“How’d she die?” His voice is a mere ancient melody.

“They killed her, Joesph.” I didn’t turn or even breathe. I let out a sharp breath.

“What will you do?” Joesph said it as a statement not a question.

“Hide.” I turned and connected my eyes with his. He is so beautiful. His wavy blonde hair and emerald green eyes. His smile was crooked, like always. He let out a deep breath and I saw a cloud of smoke come out of his mouth. He examined my face as I looked at his. He shook his head and looked away. We stood there in silence for quite some time before he walked away. A pink rosebush swayed behind me. I picked a couple off and placed them into the dirt on her grave. You’re in a safe place now and that’s all that matters.

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