Not In That Way *Completed*

There is always that one little thing that can keep a person stable. That one little thing that makes a person feel alive. The thing that can make a person smile even when they are having a bad day.

For Cora Smith that thing is more like a someone. Her someone is Zachary Dawson. Her long time best friend and the person that saved her when her life was in shambles. For years, she has been battling for his attention against all the other girls around her. However, little did she know she had him wrapped around her little finger since the very beginning.

Join Cora on her journey in discovering the truth about Zachary, while all the while she is consumed with the fear that, in the end, the only words she will hear from him are, "I'm sorry, believe me, I love you, but not in that way......"

*Based on the song, "Not in That Way" by Sam Smith*

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18. Chapter 17

For years now, I have struggled with the thought of perfection. I always thought that the only way that you could survive in life was to be perfect. After I got home from school, I scoured my closet trying to find a semi sexy outfit, of course like any girl the thoughts of having nothing in my closet struck me. When I couldn't find anything, I had to settle for just a regular pair of skinny jeans and a crop top. Normally, I would never wear something like this. I Went through a phase when I was in middle school. I honestly used to dress like a total slut. At the end of the day, I got tired of everyone calling me horrible things, so I changed. I became a different person. I became the social outcast, at least that way more people left me alone. It got to a point where I didn't hear anything from anyone, until my mother died. Then it all just came rushing back. People thought it was funny, they thought that is was completely comical that I was entirely heartbroken. I was relieved to say the least, when I got to leave that school. Unfortunately, I had to deal with my father's wrath after that, but I would have done anything to get out of that school and house.

 

I quickly throw on the clothes and skip into the bathroom to fix my hair. As I pull the brush through my hair I glance at my reflection. I am too plain. He is never gonna give me a second glace. Who's to say I'm even worth it? I roll my eyes as the usual thoughts of self hatred begin to roll over me. I grab my old makeup bag out of my suitcase, jogging back into the bathroom. I apply a quick swipe of mascara and add on some eyeliner. I grab my cherry lipgloss swiping the wand over my lips, puckering them to perfection.

 

I stare at the person looking back at me. It's not me. This is never gonna be me, but if this is all I have to do to get Zach to notice me then I'll do it. I'd do anything for him.

 

I grab my phone slipping it into my back pocket and head out the door. After talking to Amanda she excitedly informed me that the party was just down the street from Zach's house. As I make my way down the block, I can already hear the pounding music and laughter coming from the party. That is when the nerves begin to set in. My hands start to shake and I feel like I am about to throw up at the thought of what I am about to do. What if he rejects me? What if I read him wrong? He probably doesn't even like me. How could I be so stupid? Maybe I should just turn around....

 

NO! Cora you are doing this. You have waited for long enough for this moment. You are gonna walk into that house and tell him how you feel. You at least owe yourself that much.

 

Once I reach the house, I take a huge deep breath, before striding straight into the party. I walk into the living room, looking around, trying to spot the familiar brown locks that I love. I can't find him anywhere, so I move to the next room, which happens to be the kitchen. Looking around the room, I see no one familiar and I continue on throughout the house. After I find no one that I know on the bottom floor, I decide to make my journey up the stairs. Since I want to avoid any awkward introductions, I decide to ask someone if they have seen Zach anywhere.

 

"Excuse me? Do you know who Zach Dawson is?" I ask the guy nearest to me.

 

"Oh that guy that the hot new girl is obsessed with?" he slurs back.

 

"Um, yeah." I say, letting out an awkward cough.

 

"He's down the hall. Last bedroom on the right. Have fun." he winks.

 

My lips curl up in disgust and I quickly make my way down the hall to the bedroom. I stand in front of the door, not making any move to open it, trying to calm my racing heart. I can only hope that he isn't doing what that guy implied. It would ruin me if he was. I don't know what I would do with myself. I reach my hand out and grab the knob, taking one last deep breath, before I twist open the door. I wish I wouldn't of though. The sight that i see will scar me for the rest of my life. At the sound of the door opening, Amanda stirs in the bed and begins to sit up. She is curled up in Zach's side, completely naked. I stare in horror as tears begin to fill my eyes. Zach wakes up then, fluttering open his eyes and looking down at the girl in his arms. A small smile graces his face, before it is replaced with a look of complete sadness and defeat. His eyes roam around the room before they connect with my tear streaked face. A look of terror fills his face as he immediately launches himself out of the bed, but I had had enough. As he hurriedly pulls on his clothes, calling my name as he does so, I turn and rush out of the room.

 

How could you be so stupid, Cora?! Why would you ever let yourself believe that a guy like him, would like or even be an ounce bit interested in you of all people?!

 

"Cora!"' Zach screams.

 

I can hear his rushing footsteps behind me. Making me push myself even faster. As I reach the front door, I throw it open rushing outside.

 

"Cora! Let me explain! Please!" Zach sobs.

 

The pain in my heart worsens as another sob wracks his body. The tears streaming down my face obscure my vision and I make it halfway down the block, before my legs begin to give out. The second I stumble, Zach is on me in a flash. His hand latching onto my arm, like a viper would to its prey.

 

"Stop running from me! Please, just let me explain!" he begs.

 

"Leave me alone! You don't need to explain okay! I get it!" I yell, viciously tugging at my arm, attempting to get it out of his vice like gift.

 

"You need to calm down, Cora. You need to let me explain." he whispers.

 

"What is there to explain, Zach?! You slept with her! She got what she wanted, what she told me she was going to get." I mumble, yanking my arm away from him.

 

I turn around from him and begin to walk away.

 

"Cora I didn't mean to hurt you. Why are you even reacting this way? Why do you care this much? We're only friends." he asks.

 

I immediately whip around, giving him a harsh glare.

 

"Do you ever think about anyone but yourself, Zach? Has it ever occurred to you that maybe, just maybe, I have feelings too?" I growl.

 

"I never said that you couldn't have feelings,I just said that we're only friends, you shouldn't care about who I fuck." he says harshly.

 

"Of course I fucking care!" I scream at him.

 

"Why?!" he screams back, his face turns red with rage.

 

"BECAUSE I FUCKING LOVE YOU THAT'S WHY!!!" I screech, tears streaming down my face.

 

A look of shock covers his face.

 

"W-what?" he stutters.

 

"Are you happy now, Zach? is that what you wanted me to say? Do you think this is funny? Well now you know. Hurry, go tell your friends. Tell them how stupid I am for falling in love with you. Go tell them how repulsive I am. Hurry, Zach. I know you have been dying to do that since you fucking met me." I snarl, turning around and walking away.

 

He doesn't make any move to stop me. I walk the rest of the way to his house and quickly get inside. Sobs wrack my body and I hiccup uncontrollably.

 

"Cora? Honey, what's wrong?" Mrs. Dawson calls, surprise filling her features at the sudden change in mood.

 

I ignore her rushing up the stairs. When I get to my room, I reach under my bed, grabbing my suitcase. I slam it down on the bed, walking over to the closet ripping all the clothes off their hangers. I stuff everything I have ever owned into my tiny suitcase, all the while attempting to keep myself from letting my new tears free.

 

My life is over..

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Zach POV

 

I love you...

 

Her voice rings in my head and I am unable to forget it. The vulnerability and the desperation that she showed me today is completely heartbreaking. To think that she would ever think of me as the type of person that would make fun of her kills me. I can't believe that she would ever think that I would want to do that to her.

 

After I snap out of my initial shock of what she said, I hurry to my car. I get in and sit there. I don't know what to do. Do I let her go for a while and let her be alone or do I go after her. She seems pretty angry with me. I can't believe how stupid I am. Why would I ever think that it is a good idea to sleep with Amanda. That one small mistake could of just ruined my entire life.

 

Fuck this. I'm going after her.

 

I race home, nearly avoiding hitting three pedestrians.

 

When I open the door, I immediately rush up to her bedroom, throwing open the door.

 

"Cora!" I call, looking around the room.

 

Her closet door is partially open. I open it fully, only to see that everything inside is gone. My face contorts in confusion. I rush downstairs and into the kitchen.

 

"Mom? Where's Cora?!" I nearly scream, tears threatening to spill over.

 

Why am I so stupid?! This is all my fault.

 

"Honey, I'm so sorry, but she's gone. Cora left." she whispers.

 

My legs give out and I crumble to the floor.

 

I'm too late. She will never know how I feel.

 

She's gone....

 

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A/N: Hey guys!

Sorry I haven't been able to update lately. I have been entirely too busy with school and everything. I'm back now though!

I hope you guys liked this chapter! (Sorry that this is so short though...)

If you did please, vote, comment, and follow me!

See you guys again soon!

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