I wish I had never woken up with amnesia (Michael Clifford)

Some people wish to wake up with amnesia so they can forget about how much they are hurting.

All I wish is that I could have remembered .... Remembered that he had hurt me. That way I would never have fallen in love with him again

To know him, is to love him. But I never knew that Michael was the person who could love me and break me into thousand pieces at the same time

©All rights reserved


27. 25

"So we didn't technically kiss?"

"No, I stopped before it went further and you didn't kiss me back. Please don't feel guilty"

I step over the orange juice on the floor and walk over to the table. I need to sit down, My head hurts and Im confused, was Michael right? was there something going on with me and Luke?

He sits down opposite me and puts his head in his hands. After what seems like the longest silence ever he looks at me 

"Chloe, I care about you. That goes without saying. I've never had such a close friendship with a girl before, all of this was new to me and I didn't know what it meant. I thought it did mean I had feelings towards you but I over stepped the mark, I should never have done that. I am so sorry. I know I should tell Michael, in fact I will, I just know how he will react and what it could mean for the band"

"No" I say quickly and he looks at me confused 

"You don't want me to tell him?"

I shake my head 

"No please don't Luke, I don't like lying to him but nothing really happened and like you said he might over react and not do the tour or leave the band entirely. No, I don't want you to tell him"

Luke sighs and leans back in his chair 

"Chloe, I hope this means you don't hate me now? I don't want to lose our friendship. I know I shouldn't have done it but it literally did just happen. It wasn't premeditated, I would never do that to you or Michael" 

I reach over the table and hold his hand 

"I cant remember much else, But all I know is that you're my friend. It just seems so surreal that's all. That things happened between us and even though we have more memories the rest is all still a blur. You don't have feelings for me though do you? and believe me its more embarrassing for me to ask then it is for you to answer" I laugh and he smiles 

"No, I know now that we are friends. Besides, seeing you fall in love with Michael all over again just proves how much you loved him in the first place" my hand drops onto the table and it all becomes clear. I dont remember Michael but it has been so easy to love him again because of how much I must have loved him before

"I'm nearly ready" Ashton calls down the stairs and Luke stands up 

"Are you sure I haven't made you uncomfortable? I would hate myself if I thought you was angry with me"

I smile at him, maybe if I didn't love Michael so much it would be easy to fall for Luke. But that's the point, there's only one place in my heart to love as fiercely as I do and Michael has claimed that spot 

"I promise, we are one hundred percent OK, most of all this has just made remember how close we were, That's why I need to ask you a question" I hesitate and Luke sits back down 

"OK?" he replies nervously, I think he already knows what it is

"Do you know who the girl was?"

Luke shakes his head 

"please Chloe, don't make me tell you"

oh, he does know. Do they all know?

"No, i told Michael I didn't want to know and I don't, but it was just the one time wasn't it?"

Luke nods his head but he doesn't speak 

"Is she, pretty?" I cant believe im asking him this. He smiles sadly 

"she was nothing compared to you, honestly. He really did make a mistake" I nod my head and I go to speak but Ashton walks in 

"Morning Chloe, You ready Luke? Who spilled the juice I'm so thirsty" Ashton look at the floor and Luke and I both stand up at the same time 

"That would be me, I was still half asleep when we got back. Sorry" I say embarrassed but he just laughs and ruffles my hair. They leave and I go to bed for a bit. I'm glad about my memory coming back but all this information has been a lot to take in. Luke and I will be OK and I know somehow now we can get our friendship back on track 


I have a lovely long nap then get up to have a bath. Its easier to wash my hair now as I've got used to the stitches and they don't feel so prominent on my scalp anymore. I wrap my hair in a towel and put on some fluffy pyjamas and my dressing gown. I walk into the kitchen and Maddison is gluing some photographs into an album. I walk over and take a look 

"I'm making Ashton a little present, just something to look through whilst hes away, in case he forgets what I look like Or that he has a girlfriend" she whispers and I sit down next to her 

"of course he wont forget, he loves you"

she puts down a photograph and then leans her head against my shoulder 

"I don't think that's enough Chloe, love doesn't always conquer all. Besides hes going to have girls throwing themselves at him, I'm not that special that he wouldn't say no" I tense at her words and she sits up to look at me 

"shit Chloe I didn't mean you, I wasn't thinking about you and Michael. I didn't mean it. sorry" she panics and I take a deep breath 

"its like a curse isn't it"

"what is?" she asks confused 

"I will never forget what he did, well in a way I have because I have amnesia" I point to my head "But I know he did it. I've moved on from it though, I have to because I want me and him to work"

she holds my hand 

"hey, despite my reservations about him coming back into your life I'm glad he did because when you two are together its like it makes sense. You two work because you are meant to be with each other"

she lets go of my hand and looks down 

"whats that on your finger?"

I grin, I'm more than happy to change the subject talking about this 

"its an eternity ring, do you like it? Michael gave it me so I would remember him and have something to wear that symbolises his commitment to me"

Maddison holds my hand and studies the ring 

"wow you lucky cow, It doesn't look cheap either! see this is what I mean, he loves you Chloe he really really does" I look at the ring and smile proudly, I know it, I knew it, he does love me

"we should start getting ready for tonight its getting late. Come on lets put our best clothes on. We are with the band after all" she laughs and pulls me upstairs so she can help me get ready. I smile as she starts rummaging through her make up, I honestly think this is the happiest time of my life 


We are ready to go and I cant help but do a double take as I look in the mirror, Maddsion is good with make up, amazing in fact! My brown eyes look even darker against the smokey eye shadow and my cheeks look rosy. She makes me pout as she slides some lip gloss over my mouth and then I press my lips together. I'm wearing dark blue super tight skinny jeans that cling to my curves but luckily have some room in them so I can breathe, An over sized black baggy vest top that comes quite low but not low enough to show off my assets and a black cropped leather jacket. I wanted to wear my converse but Maddison said it would ruin the look, luckily I found some black ankle boots in the back of my wardrobe. My hair cascades down my back in loose waves and I actually feel confident for a change. Maddsion looks breathtaking, shes in a floor length maxi dress that is dark purple and it moves against her figure when she walks 

"I look like a rock chick and you look like a supermodel" I laugh when I stand next to her, at five foot six she towers over me in her heels which easily make her about five foot ten

"oh stop it" she grins "anyway its time to go rock star, cabs here"

The rainbow room is more sophisticated than the ocean bar. The stage and dance floor are bigger and it holds more people. Michael looks up when I walk into the room and he literally drops the guitar he was tuning. He walks over and I hold onto his shoulders as he hugs me, picking me up in the process 

"where have you been? why didn't you text me back I was worried you wasn't coming?" 

he puts me down and his eyes look into mine an then appreciatively over my outfit 

"fuck you look amazing" he gasps and I blush 

"my phone died when I was getting ready and I couldn't find my charger, also thank you. we sort of match" I laugh when I see hes in black skinny jeans, A Metallica vest that's beneath a black leather jacket. The only difference is he is wearing converse 

"Come on lets go to the bar" he takes my hand and I follow him, knowing I would gladly follow him anywhere

I manage to have one drink with him before the room gets full of people and then the crowd start chanting for them to get on stage. I find Maddison and we stand at the side of the dance floor so we can watch them. I don't take my eyes off Michael and he looks at me the whole time. He has the ability to keep me transfixed and somehow I think I have the same effect on him

We both smile at each other and when they sing she looks so perfect Michael tells the crowd the song is dedicated to me and they cheer, Only a few girls look like they want to rip my hair out of my head.

"They are going to play straight through without a break so we can go back to Ashtons for a little party. A few of their old school friends are coming back as well so it should be a good night" Maddsion shouts into my ear over the music and I grin at her. I'm glad we all get to spend some time together, I'm going to make these next three weeks the best we've had. The band are a success and they have everyone singing and cheering for a solid hour and a half. Me and Maddison take it in turns to go to get drinks but in the end we end up buying three bottles of wine and sharing it that way as the queue to the bar is ridiculous. I look at the crowd and they love the boys, the songs are catchy and people stay on their feet never leaving the dance floor. I look at the front and Sophie and her friend are pressed against the bars, cheering the loudest and trying to get the attention of anyone who will look their way. I haven't heard off her since I saw her when we went to play pool, I'm a little pissed she didn't come over to say hi but then again she acts like she doesn't know me half the time so I don't know why I'm offended. I roll my eyes and let her get on with it, if she wants to act like a groupie that's up to her 

"Right guys, this is our last song. Thank you so much for coming out to see us and we know we will see you all again soon" Luke tells the crowd and once again people cheer wildly for them 

"Right I'm gonna go pee, can you order us three cabs for eleven thirty? That will give them enough time to pack up. Ashtons Address is 442 coal way road" she hands me her phone and I walk outside repeating the address so I don't forget. The breeze feels good against my cheeks and my ear drums are grateful for the break as I've been standing so close to the speakers 

I unlock the phone and start to enter the number into the keypad 

Amnesia is a strange thing, It takes one accident to wipe away your memories and a moment for them to come back. I cant explain it to you, I can only say it feels like deja vu .....

But I know this is real, I know this happened 

"I'm going to go and get Calum, call a cab I'll be back in two seconds" he hands me his phone and I go to the call log, the amount of cabs we have is crazy, I really should learn to drive. I scroll through the numbers. why has he got so many missed calls off her? I look up and make sure he isn't coming come back as I shakily go to his messages 


My heart stops as I see her number, her name isn't saved in his phone but here it is, that number again. I open up the messages and its like an outer body experience I'm shaking that much 

*Michael please answer your phone, talk to me*


*Leave me alone, what we did was a MISTAKE! I'm sorry if I have lead you on but I fucked up! Please tell me you wont tell Chloe?*


*Of course I wont, But I know you want me or else it would never have happened. I don't want to hurt Chloe either so i'll keep it a secret. It wont be long until you come back for more, I've seen the way you look at me. The way you made love to me. It was meant to happen and you know it*


*you're delusional, it will never happen AGAIN!!*


*of course it will Michael, it was that good it will happen again*


My hand covers my mouth and I let out a sob. I remember now and I feel physically sick The betrayal, the lies, its all too much. I push the phone into my pocket and hold my chest as I try to steady my breathing, oh god make it stop I don't want to remember anymore. Please someone make this stop. I cover my ears as its like I can physically hear his voice, The argument, the accident. I cant cope, this cant be real. I walk back inside, somehow through my pain and anger I walk back in and I see her. I walk over trying to calm my breathing, trying to get through this even though the pain of my heart breaking is all too real 

her smile fades when she sees me 

"whats going on?" she swallows nervously 

"I know Maddison, a memory has just come back and I know" she shakes her head, she looks at the stage then back at me 

"sweetie, you've had a lot to drink lets go outside"

"so its true? Oh god" I cant breathe, I'm going to have a panic attack or a heart attack

Maddison starts to cry as a sob overtakes my body again. She pulls me into the dark corner of the room 

"I put all the pieces together Chloe, I am so so sorry"

I turn and look Michael who is blissfully unaware of all the damage I remember and then I look at the girl who has destroyed my world 




It was Sophie 

Join MovellasFind out what all the buzz is about. Join now to start sharing your creativity and passion
Loading ...