Suicide Saver *rewritten version*

More tears streamed down my face as I looked into the darkness that was the ocean. This is it. I'm actually doing this once and for all. This is the day I die. I turned around once more just to make sure no one would stop me from jumping. I was about to turn back to the cold water, when I was another person. What? No one was there a second ago. I have to do this fast. Right as my fingers were about to slip off of the cold metal, I heard his voice say "Don't do it"

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4. Momma Lucia's Cucina

"Alright, so where would you like to go first?" I asked Justin was we exited the hotel. "Well I don't want to go anywhere with a lot of people" he answered, which made me laugh. I guess he doesn't want to run into too many fans and paparazzi, but you can't walk a block without seeing at least one person in this city. I looked up at him and he looked extremely confused at my sudden outburst.

 

"If you didn't want to see too many people, then why would you come here?" I questioned, rhetorically.

 

"So do you know of anywhere?" he asked, rubbing the back of his neck, his cheeks red from his recent statement.

 

"I actually do" I smiled at him, grabbing his wrist. I turned to the right and started walking in that direction, dragging him along with me. We did pass several people while walking, but Justin kept his hood up and his head down, so no could catch a glimpse of his face and recognize him.

 

After a couple of blocks, we finally reached our destination. I stopped walking, causing Justin to stop in his tracks as well. He looked up at the sign and read it aloud. "Momma Lucia's Cucina" he said, smiling.

 

"Well don't just stand there. Come on!" I ran in while, once again, dragging him along.

 

We walked into the establishment and the smell of fresh cooked garlic bread immediately hit us. I smiled as I saw the twenty-or-so costumers enjoying their lunch. Even the restaurant wasn't too big, it always had costumers. 

 

"Aunt Lucia!" I called out, once I reached the kitchen door. I pushed it open and waved Justin on, encouraging him to follow along. I nodded and walked up behind me. Once I walked in I received several 'hi Kimberly's, considering my aunt does own this place, and it is practically my home. I even worked here for a few years, but quit recently because I needed time to think about things, which obviously wasn't a good idea.

 

I finally found my aunt, who was currently plating some of her delicious chicken cutlet parmesan. She looked up and smiled once she found me standing to her side. She wiped off her hands and then opened her arms for a hug. I accepted her offer and squeezed her waist tightly.

 

"Oh, who's this?" She asked as she pulled away and saw Justin. who still had his face covered with his hood.

 

"Oh, this is my friend Justin, I was hoping we could maybe hang out in the lounge for a little while.." I drifted off, hoping she would let us stay.

 

"Of course, anything for my favorite niece" she smiled widely, wiping the beads of sweat off of her forehead.

 

"Thanks" I said, kissing her cheek and heading to the lounge, which was right outside of the kitchen. I opened the door and revealed the large TV and two black leather couches. Along with a mini fridge and coffee table in the middle.

 

"Can I get you anything?" I offered, while he sat on one of the couches.

 

"Can I just get a coke?" he asked, taking off his jacket and shades. "Sure thing" I replied, before smiling and making my way back into the kitchen. I was at the door, when my aunt called me. I turned around to see her smirked at me, with her arms crossed.

 

"Who exactly is that boy?" she asked, stepping closer to me. I looked at her like she had five heads. Just because I brought him to the restaurant didn't mean anything. Why whenever a guy and a girl hang out together, do people always assume they're a couple.

 

"Relax Aunt Lucia, he's just my friend" I said, keeping it simple. No need to explain the situation we were in. It was awkward and complicated.

 

"Okay, whatever you say" she said, reading more into it than there really was. She gave me a sweet smile and walked out into the eating area. I sighed and followed, but instead of walking to the tables to greet the costumers, I walked to the refrigerator behind the counter. I grab two bottles of Pepsi and went back into the kitchen. Although the smells were tempting me to take a bite of just about everything in there, I forced myself to go back into the employee lounge, where I found Justin where he was before, but now on his phone.

 

He looked up and smiled when heard the door open. I returned the smile and tossed him his drink. I then sat next to him and opened my own, taking a sip.

 

"Can I ask you something?" he asked, turning his body to face me. "Sure" I replied, turning toward him as well.

 

"This is going to sound weird, please don't get offended, but how do you go from almost killing yourself to being all happy and cheerful?" he questioned seriously.

 

I took a deep breathe. I actually got this question a lot. I naturally had a sweet a bubbly personality,  I guess it came from Aunt Lucia always telling me to be positive when I would cry to her about my 'parents'.

 

"Well I guess I just have good days and bad days. I was on that bridge because for a while, it was just bad day after bad day, there was no relief. I felt like no one cared. That's where you come in." I smiled up at him, while the tears that had threatened to fall seconds ago, weren't a problem anymore.

 

"You were like a sign or something and I allowed you to convince me that suicide is never an option. Thank you." A soon as I finished, I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around his neck. Yeah, I'm a hugger. He chuckled and wrapped his arms around my waist in return. I rested my head in the crook of his neck, taking in his amazing scent. 

 

"Oh, sorry" I head come from behind me. I immediately pulled back from the hug and looked back to see one of the chefs, Giovanni, standing in the doorway, with an awkward expression. I blushed and sat beck down where I previously had.

 

" Sorry, I just need to call my wife" he said, walking over to his coat, which was hanging in the closet. "It's okay Gi, it is the employee lounge" I confirmed. He smiled at me and put the phone to his ear, to talk to his wife I presume.

 

"Movie" I whispered to Justin, trying not to interrupt Giovanni's phone call. He nodded, so I grabbed the remote and put on Netflix. By the time it loaded and I got to 'search', Giovanni was done with his quick phone call and exited the room.

 

"What do you want to watch?" I asked, looking up at him. "21 Jumpstreet?" he offered. I nodded and typed it into the search to find it. I never saw the movie and heard it was pretty good. I mean, with Channing Tatum and Jonah Hi8ll, how could it be bad? It just isn't possible.

 

I finally found it and saw it was for free. That's good because although my Aunt Lucia pays for just about everything for me, including my phone and clothes, she's still cheap when it comes to paying for unnecessary items. That includes movies that you can get for free.

 

I put the movie on and set the remote down on the table next to the sofa. I then opened up my Pepsi and took another sip. This is all I've had all day and it's already passed noon. However, I was used to it. I now rarely ate two meals a day. This may not seem like that big of a deal, but this was an improvement. A couple weeks back, I would rarely eat, let alone a whole meal. What I ate in a week was probably equivalent to what an average person eats in as day. Pretty much just little snacks, such as an apple.

 

Fortunately, I'm in a better place now. Now I'm eating much more than I used to, which really isn't saying much, but it's still a step in the right direction. I'm also eating and drinking whatever I want. No more strictly eating apples and drinking water. Now I can eat ice cream and drinking soda, like now, without feeling guilty. Well, as guilty at least.

 

"Are you even watching?" Justin asked, which caused me to snap out of my thoughts and back into reality, to find him staring at me. "Yeah, yeah I'm good. Sorry, I was just thinking" I confessed.

 

"What about?" Wow he is one curious kid.

 

"Um, nothing really" I lied, trying not to tell him my entire past. Only two people know about it; my best friends Lydia and Kyra. They've been there for me since I can remember, and they've always helped me out with anything they could. But they're all I need. I don't want to many people knowing about my abuse, starvation, and self-harm, because then they might look at me differently and see me as a charity case, which I don't want. I just want to be Kimberly.

 

"Are you sure? You seem off" he asked, still trying to get me to confess fully.

 

"Yeah, let's just watch" I suggested, desperately trying to change the damn subject already. I didn't need to expose my life secrets to someone who was still close to a stranger. In face, he was a stranger two days ago.

 

We continued to watch the movie in peace, but not silence. Turns out, we're both that annoying person making stupid remarks during the entire movie. We were constantly pointing out stupid things and repeating hilarious things that were said or done. But apparently, it's not annoying when you're both doing it, because it just made things better. Justin is actually super funny. 

 

"So do you think we should actually go sight-seeing now?" Justin asked, as soon as the move ended. I looked at the time and saw that a few employees would go on break soon and they would come in here, and I didn't want anyone noticing Justin and making it into a big deal

 

"Yeah!" I said, grabbing his hand and leading him out of the restaurant.

 

*************

Hi loves! I'm SOOO sorry that I haven't updated, but I've been so busy I just haven't had time. I know I made a promise, but I broke it and I'm so sorry!!

 

And again, the main characters name is now Kimberly, just to get rid of confusion.  

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