What makes you happy?

I want to tell a big "thank you" for the competition #WhatMakesYouHappy. When I saw it in the morning on May, 8, I seriously thought over the answer to this question. It helped me to overcome the sorrow I had the last several days. The story, I've written, describes this day (May, 8).

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What makes you happy?

 

So funny,

            so ironic

                        to answer this question

when you think that

the world around you

                       is dull.

It doesn't matter

            if it is spring outside.

It doesn't matter

            if the sun shines brightly.

You are

            shedding tears.

Your soul

            is wounded.

You lost

            a close person.

 

Your happy memories

            with this person

                        are superimposed over

by only one recollection –

seeing this person

            as white as sheet

                        as cold as ice

in a blue coffin.

 

 

This makes you sick.

 

 

“However, answer it.”

“You should answer this question.”

“No,”

            “you must."

This is what I tell myself.

 

“Because if you answer it,”

“it will help you gain strength”

            “to overcome your sorrow...”

 

 

Will it?

 

 

 

I go for a walk

            because sitting at home

makes my heart hurt more.

 

 

Today is May, 8th.

The temperature is 20°C.

It is spring, indeed.

 

 

I go along the streets,

            look up –

the clear blue sky

           is seen through

                       tender green leaves.

 

 

“Rustle rustle...”

The light wind blows,

            making leaves whisper.

So bright outside –

              so cloudy in my heart.

The only thought in my head

            is the question:

“What makes me happy?”

 

 

I go further to the boulevard.

“Clang clank. Chang clack...”

The noise of the seaport is heard.

 

“CHUGGA chugga chugga”

            “CHUGGA chugga chugga”

                       “CHOO CHOOOOO...”

a freight train is going through the port,

banging the wheels on the trackers,

and once and again making a hoot.

 

 

“Ahahah! Ahh ha ha...”

Children are laughing somewhere near by...

 

 

 

I take a deep breath:

blooming chestnuts,

                        here and there

a bit of bitter odor of violet lilac.

The wind brings

the scent of freshly cut grass...

 

 

 

“Chatter chatter.”

            “Chatter chatter...”

birds singing...

 

 

 

I reach the park.

“CLUNCH clunch”

            “CLUNCH clunch...”

the sound of my footsteps on gravel.

 

 

I sit down on a bench,

            facing the port.

 

I listen to people speaking:

“Murmur, murmur...”

            just to the sound of their voices

without thinking about

           the meaning of their talk.

 

 

“Ah uh ah uh.”

            “Bow-wow. “

                       “Ah uh ah uh...”

a dog is running by.

           

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Dibble dibble dopp dopp.”

            “Dibble dibble dopp dopp...”

it starts raining.

 

I look up:

So cloudy outside –

            so clear in my heart.

 

 

 

If you ask me again

            what makes me happy –

                        I'll answer you:

Life.

 

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