Flash diary comp: a year in the making

Apart of the competition for the year long diary. I am a normal teenager with a life different from all the others, read what it's all about.


2. May 6, 2015 10:45pm


Today was hectic to say the least. It was so hard to get myself out of bed, my eyes were glued shut till I forced my body up. I gave myself a head rush simply walking aground the room looking for clothes. I wore a pair of jeans and a t-shirt from a 5k I did last saturday (color me rad). My dad drove myth school which was a surprise that he was even awake at such early hours let alone offering up a ride. We stopped at Starbucks then went off to school, because of some science field trip many students were absent in majority of our classes. The day went by slow and I dreaded most of it, anxiety still on my back about this trig test I have to make up. I just don't understand trig and the formulas aren't sticking with me. Geometry is hard enough but they decided to add a trig unit to the course. I think the entire board of education did this on purpose to see me fail, it all gets to be a bit too much at times. Always having to wake with the sun and make it through the day just to go home and take care of two little boys below age eight while trying to do homework simultaneously is hard. WHY CAN'T LIFE BE EASIER! 

To add to all my anxiety my mom is hiding something from everyone. She is sick I know it, and it's something serious she just won't say. If it wasn't so serious why would she have doctors appointments at eight in the evening and always be waiting on a doctors call. I try and distract myself with friends but I feel like that's crumbling, the conversations just aren't as involved as they used to be. I feel like my two best friends (J and G) are slowly pulling away from me to disappear like the rest. 
On top of that this girl that I used to be friends with won't stop having her mom call mine. I know you must wonder why I'm complaining about friends but avoiding this other girl. She and I were friends mainly when I was mentally ill and she was the one who kept me depressed, because she encouraged it. These new friends (J and G) are so positive and make me smile for real and I laugh when I am with them. This other girl always told sent me depressing songs and quotes and would never stop mentioning that she knows when I harm myself. I know when I harm myself why must you remind me, thesis already world war lll occurring in my head. ALl she did was attribute to the issues and I released her grasp on me and ran. Now she wants to be friends again and I know it is unhealthy to be around her. I hate to be rude and ignore people but you have to look out for yourself sometimes. 


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