Close As Strangers.

I love him, I do. I love him with every ounce of my body, I’m just tired. Tired of pretending that I’m okay and that I’m happy for him because, I’m not. I’m not happy for him and I’m certainly not okay.
Could you live without the love of your life for 6 months straight?.


9. Gotta Get Out

-Alexa’s POV-

After the crowd started to leave Luke excused himself with a phone call, I laid back on the grass the rays of the sun warming my body, gazing up at the blue sky I let my mind riddle with thoughts. I should probably see Ashton sometime soon, talk things through face to face and see where it goes. I miss him more than ever, I pull out my phone that was stuck in the pocket of my denim shorts and press the power button on for the first time in 3 days. Instantly my phone flooded with texts and missed calls, 12 missed calls and 23 texts from Ashton, 13 missed calls from Mum and 7 texts from Luke. Clicking onto the messages I open the last one from Luke ‘Am on the way home, be there soon! Xx’ laughing quietly to myself I turn my phone of again mentally noting to call my mum later. Just as I was lying my head down again Luke wondered towards me his phone still pressed to his ear “Yeah, alright mate be there soon” and with that he ended his phone call he stepped one leg over me and held out his arms “Come on we’re leaving” he laughed pulling me up “Jesus you’ve been eating too much ice cream” He clutched his back miming in pain, slapping his shoulder he linked our arms “So where are we of to now?” I questioned “If I told you, you’d never believe me” He smirked “Yeah? Try me Hemmings” I smirked back “To see Harry Styles” he grinned showing his teeth, as I stopped dead in my tracks.

“The Harry Styles?” I questioned once again as Luke pulled into a hotel car park in his black Land Rover, “Yes Alexa, Harry Styles” he laughed quietly knowing full well how much I loved One Direction “Like actual, proper, Harry Styles? Not like some weirdo you found on the side of the street called Harry Styles?” I started breathing heavily, Luke laughed even more “I swear Alexa if you freak out on me, I will not let you meet the rest of them” I squealed in his ear “Ouch, Jesus Al, breathe!!!!” he clutched his ears with his hands taking in the air around me I inhaled holding it for slightly longer than usual. “Right, I’m okay, I’m good” I don’t know if I was trying to convince him or myself suddenly my heart started going into overdrive and my stomach fluttered with butterflies “Good” Luke stated unbuckling his seat belt “Wait, I’m not, do I look okay? Jesus I’m not prepared for this Luke, I hate you, what? He’s in there? Are you sure? What if he hates me? Oh gosh.”  I inhaled again pulling the mirror in front of me down, adjusting my hair “You look beautiful, you always do and no one could ever hate you” I turned to my right realising Luke was staring at me, smiling I unbuckled my seatbelt and slowly opened the door.

I latched onto Luke’s hand as we stood waiting outside a hotel door; he squeezed it encouragingly smiling at my nervousness. We waited for what seemed like forever until a bundle of curls and dimples opened the door and smiled widely instantly reminding me of Ashton, “Hiiiiiiiiiiiii” He beamed, my eyes widened as I gazed into his emerald eyes. “Hey mate good to see you” Luke detached from my hand and enveloped Harry into a small hug leaving me standing alone “And you must be Alexa” Harry smiled opening his arms to hug me. He knows my name. He knows my name. He knows my name. Act cool. Act cool. “Hi, I love you” As soon as the words left my lips I wanted to crawl into a hole and die. I earned a wide eyed look from Luke and a chuckle from Harry “Fan?” Harry questioned “Only the biggest! And sorry, you know that thing that makes you think about what you’re going to say before you say it? Yeah I don’t have one of those” I waffled on earning bigger and bigger stares from Luke and even more chuckles from Harry “Well, as it goes, I’m a big fan of yours” Harry smiled leading us to a small living area assuming he was talking to Luke I began taking in the surroundings looking at the view of Sydney from the window. Interrupted by a cough I stared at Luke who was nodding towards Harry who was staring at me “What?” I looked in-between the two of them “I’m a big fan of you” Harry smiled “Wha..? Of me? What? Why?” Trying to understand what on earth he was talking about “Your voice it’s amazing! I saw the video in the park, have you ever performed like that before?” He smiled showing every single teeth, I nodded trying to register what he just said trying to swallow the lump in my throat. Harry Styles has witnessed me singing. Luke answered his question for me “Nah, she has stage fright pretty bad” He smiled sympathetically “Oh that’s a shame, I guess we could get you therapy for it?” Harry directed the question towards Luke coming back to reality I looked at Luke blanked faced “Wait? Why would I need therapy” I rubbed my temple “Well if you’re opening for us you kind of need to perform” Harry laughed. WHAT. “What?” I’ve never been more confused in my whole life “You haven’t told her?” Harry pointed from Luke to me “Yes, Luke haven’t you told me?” I gave him a look that could kill, I seriously wanted to run and not look back but my feet wouldn’t let me. “It was supposed to be a surprise for you and Ashton, you guys missed each other so much on this tour and management were looking for another opening act for the next, it just made sense Al, but then you two broke up and shit got real” Luke said the whole thing while looking at his hands.

You could cut the tension in the room with a knife. 

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