Dying Wish

People say cancer makes you depressed, makes you want to give up, there's nothing that can make you feel stronger or alive. Maybe that's true, maybe its not. For me its not true. Sometimes you have that one special thing that helps you. That you get excited to see, to watch, to listen. Sometimes its just a tv show maybe a toy or your phone. One Direction is what has helped keep me alive. I have cancer. Its called Melanoma and its a skin cancer that can be cured unless it spreads to much. Every patient is part of The Wish Foundation we get a wish. All I can think about is that one girl that got to meet Kim Kardashian, if she could meet her then maybe I have a small chance of meeting One Direction.


15. Chapter: 14- We believe

     “Payton your phone is making crazy noises and it’s starting to piss me off.” I’m laying in my bed staring at my blank wall while my mom yells at me about my phone, I know its going off its right next to me. I lazily pick up my phone and see millions of twitter notifications across the screen of my phone.


     I sit up and open the twitter app and check my notifications and their growing by the second. I press one of the boxes and it takes me to a page by some random user and I read the tweet, ‘My best wishes for @Payton_Reynolds.' There are millions of tweets like this and I look at what’s trending and #WeBelievePayton is trending worldwide. I have over a million followers and there are tons of accounts that support me.


     I click the box so that way I can tweet something.

  'Thank you everyone who has tweeted and that #WeBelievePayton is trending worldwide. I will be doing a live video on YouNow in two minutes explaining about what has happened to me! I will tweet the link.' I press tweet and I get tons of likes and retweets. I make an account on YouNow and tweet the link. I press the button so that it’s live and take a deep breath before explaining to tons of people what’s happen to me.


     "Hey everyone! So I just saw that hashtag We Believe Payton is trending worldwide and I want to say thank you! Most of you don't know what has happened other than that the surgery was not successful. There are stages of Melanoma and while I was in surgery they stopped after making sure I would be fine to wake up and told my mom that I the surgery was not successful and that I was on the last stage of Melanoma." Tears start streaming down my face and I see tons of people tweeting and comment stuff but I continue.


    "The last stage for you who don't know is pretty much not curable. I have a surgery scheduled in a week. The same day that One Direction will be performing here. I will not be able to see the boys before it happens. If its not successful I will not have that much longer to live. I am not saying that I'm giving up-" I stop and start crying. I don't care that I'm crying in front of millions of people.


     "I'm saying that if it doesn't work I just want to say thank you to all who have supported and donated to any charity not just to mine. Because if I die, I know that I won't die as just some girl with cancer. I will die with tons of people who support me and have helped me. You really have helped me. I'm not famous like One Direction or famous at all. But even just ten people commenting and telling me that that they believe in me has helped me so much. Each one of you that has commented, tweeted or just messaged me has been amazing. I smile every time." I smile and try to wipe the tears but more tears just replace the old ones.


    "I started as just a random girl diagnosed with Melanoma. She got a wish to meet One Direction and it came true. Then the boys helped me and then all of a sudden I had tons of followers on twitter and they never hated they just supported. I know I'm rambling and I'm sorry, I'm just so happy because of all of you. I have done some things that I'm not proud of. I wanted to give up, I'm not going to lie I did cut. I have lots of scars on my wrists and thighs. But once I heard One Direction I slowly stopped cutting, I started eating more. Now some people are probably thinking they’re just a band of five immature boys and maybe your right but to me and to their fans they’re different. The songs they sing they have a meaning not just some random meaning but an actual meaning that we deal with every day." The tears start to stop and I can breath a little better.


    "I'm not sixty or anything but I have gone through a lot but something that I do know for sure is every word you say has meaning. You call someone ugly they will spend the rest of their life trying and trying to be pretty but they never will. Because they will put on makeup and put on things that aren't them it’s someone else. So they have lost their true beauty. I'm not saying their ugly but you do not need make up to be beautiful and trying to hide a little scar on your cheek or your freckles does not make you any different than you were before."


    "To people in the army and people who fight for freedom for us get scars but they don't complain they take that as a trophy. They saved millions of people. That’s why we have days that we celebrate the soldiers. We don't really celebrate them though. Do we? Most people use it as an excuse to get drunk and party. My view on the world has changed. Christmas isn't about getting presents; Halloween isn't about dressing up and getting free candy. They all have meanings and when people say I know what the meaning is but do you really? Do you honestly celebrate them for what there suppose to be? Maybe you have some idea. Each Christmas you get presents or get something their are tons of kids who live in orphanages with no parents or don't even have enough money to buy a pair of socks to keep their feet warm."


    "The point of this is before you take things for granted think about all of the kids who have less because one day everything you think you get or deserve won't be there."


    I wave towards the camera before signing off. I hope people understand what I said because they’re people who have everything and they’re people who don't have enough. I'm in the middle. I have everything I could possibly need but yet I don't have enough faith to believe in myself.

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