Keep Trying

Some people say that the minute you think about giving up, think about the reasons why you held on so long, or who you held on for. But those people don't realize that there is a difference between giving up, and knowing when you've had enough. After leaving everyone back at the hospital, I decided to avoid any contact with them. But it's gonna be hard. Especially avoiding Niall. I miss him already. I wanna see him. Hug him. Kiss him. Make him smile. And laugh. And just lie in bed with him. Cuddling. No. Stop it. You can't see him. It's for the best and you know it.

☆ Sequel to I'm Trying ☆


2. Game of Life

Kyra's P.O.V.

I couldn't believe I was doing this. Leaving that is. It's not like I wanted to, but I saw no other choice. Now there was a bus ticket in my hand, an Adidas bag hanging at my hip, and a single tear escaping from my eyes. I hoped they wouldn't notice I was gone right away, or that the nurse would tell. As much as I wanted to see Niall come rushing after me on a white horse begging me to stay, I just wouldn't be able to deal with that right now.

I was not ready. I would never be ready. But I saw the bus come around the corner and I rushed to wipe my tear away. I was done crying, which was funny since I didn't know I had started. The news might have seemed like a lot to take in, but at this point, enough tears were being shed. So I willed myself not to cry. But there is only so long enough your emotions take over. Bubble over like someone fucking up potatos. It's not meant to bubble over, but it does. Impossible, but possible.

The bus made it's way to me. Stoped and opened it's doors. Welcoming me in. I took a deeep breath, and walked on. I handed him my pass.

"Arizona is a long way from here young lady."

"I know," I croaked out.

"Everything alright miss?"

"Yes. Just...starting over," I said, thinking about it. It was like I had to convince myself this was right.

He nodded and motioned me to take a seat.

I went to the middle of the bus which was mostly empty, thank god. I sat my bag down next to me, hoping if the bus began to fill up, people would take a hint. The night was bright, and I watched the moon, as the bus moved into motion, and we drove away. I realized my hand was touching the window, fingers outspread as if I was reaching for something. But when I looked inbetween my index finger and my middle one, I saw him.

I saw him.

The man I will be trying so hard to forget, was outside the window, moving next to it. But he was standing still facing me. HIs blodne hair wipping in the wind of travel, his face still warm and smiling. Which was something it would most likely not be doing soon.

"Ni-Niall?" I whispered to the man outside.

"Kyra-" It said back, but it began to become began to fade away.

This tugged at every being in my body because...because I wished he hadn't.

I took my hand away from the window, and placed it over my mouth as I let out silent sobs. I pulled my knees up to my chest to keep myself from falling apart. But I don't close my eyes. I keep them open, hoping I can see his face again, even if it is only a hallucination.

Harry's P.O.V.

"What do you mean? You let her just walk out? She wasn't even supposted to be discharged for days!" I yelled at the nurse.

"When she told us,. we checked her over, her incisions look alright, and she wasn't experiencing any fatigue so we let her go," she explained calmly.


"Harry," Niall interupted, his face long since he sat down with the crumpled paper. "It's not her fault, this was Kyra's decision."

"Ya Harry. It was Kyra's decision," Louis said.

"How would you know?" I barked at him, angry. How would he know? Only Niall has read that paper, only he knows what she had to say.

"Be-Because we argued about it when I saw her."

We all knew Louis had seen her last night, but he didn't tell us what they talked about.

"What?" We all screamed at him, to his wince.

"She talked about wanting to leave, then threw a fit so I was kicked out. I couldn't stop her."

Amy ran over to me and started hitting Louis chest with her fists. It wasn't hard, but it was her venting her anger on him, and Louis didn't stop her. "Why! Why didn't you try harder! Why didn't you tell us! Why Louis?! Wh-hy-hy..."

Her sobbs took over, her voice cracking out and I came over to her, peeling her off of Louis. I spun her around and she sobbed into my shirt. "Why..." I heard her croak out.

"Shh baby."

I patted her head, and smoothed down her hair.

"Well, what are we going to do now?" Liam asked.

"The only thing that is reasonable, we go after her," Xena said, taking a hand out from her crossed arms, and flipping it as if to say "what other option is there?"

"She doesn't want to be followed, so why should we?" Louis asked.

"She doesn't know what she wants! She isn't thinking clearly! You honestly think she wants to run from this life, alone and not safe from side effects she sometimes won't be able to recognise. She might be in danger, from others and herself!" Xena argued. She was passionate about this and turned to Niall. "Don't you agree?"

"I....I...I...don't know anymore."

"Don't you want to go after her?" Zayn asked.

"Of course, but I don't think she wants to see me right now."

"So she can see all of this time! Not just you. We can persuade her to come home!"

The whole room was silent.

"We'll I'm going. And if anyone wants to join me, I'll be outside."

Xena stormed off, and outside. We heard lightning strike close by, which made us all jump out of our skin. Then it began to pour buckets. Within seconds Xena was back inside, her jacket and clothes soaked, her hair flat for once. "Okay," she rephrased. "I see that is no longer an option. I might as well have been golfing, holding a metal rod, begging for it to hit me. I will be waiting by that window," she said pointing. She walked over there and stood, back to us. She whipped out her cell phone and put it to her ear.

"Well?" Niall asked.

"What are you going to do?" Louis asked.

Niall sighed and stood up, head held high. "I'm going with her."

"What?" Louis replied.

"Xena's right. She could be in danger. And I made a promise to stay by her side, and I'm not breaking that. Follow me or don't. But I'm following her."

We all stared at him.

"I'm in," Liam said.

"I'm in," Amy said, head still on my chest.

"I'm in," I replied.

"I'm in," Zayn said.

"I'm sooooo in," Taylor said.

After a sigh, and a rub on the back of his neck, Louis said, "I'm in.'

Niall came over and thanked him.

"I'm in," we heard from a phone, and Zayn pulled it out behind his back with a smile. "It's Perrie," he explained. "She got some time off work."

"Good thing," Xena said coming back over to us. "Because I just talked to your manager and booked your tour bus for the trip. I figured ya'll might give in."

Louis gave her a look.

"What?! I travel in style , or I don't travel at all!"

We all cracked up laughing for the first time in god knows when.

Niall's P.O.V.

I pulled out my phone when the bus got here. As the rain hit the windows, I texted Kyra's phone.

Hey babe. I get why you left, and I'm not mad. But we're coming for you, searching for you. I don't know where you are, or where you're planning to go, but I'm coming. Got to many promises to keep. And Niall Horan doesn't break promises.

I knew she might not reply. Hell it was a less than 3% chance she would reply. But she would get it.

This had just turned into a game of cat and mouse. No, a game of life. And our lives would meet again, if it was the last thing I did.

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