Keeping Secrets

All Aileen ever wanted was to forget. You shouldn't need to be told; death doesn't make good memories. Moving to Beacon Hills has placed more stress on the mental locks that hold all of Aileen's secrets, and there's no telling what will come to the surface. Will she fall deeper into her hopeless pit or rise up with others like her?
*Teen Wolf Fanfiction*

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19. Vacillate

(Season two Episode seven)

           I wish staying loyal to Scott and Stiles would prove to be some sort of advantage, but right now there seems to have been no use in doing so. I have nothing to look forward to now aside from getting a favor from them both if they don't find a way to shimmy out of it. Now I have to go to school with the echos of what had happened. I wish I hadn't had made a seen. Can't imagine what the school thinks of me now. I'd like to think that it is no big deal, but if it is anything like what happened to Isaac when he was arrested, I have no doubt that the next few days are going to be some of my worst.

            Rita comes into my room as my alarm blares. I didn't bother to shut it off deciding to wait for it to go into snooze. Rita on the other hand had had enough of its noise and turned it off with a bit of force having no idea how. I could hear her banging on it and pressing all of the buttons on it trying to find the off switch before giving up and unplugging the damn thing.

"Come on," she says pulling the blanket off of me and turning on my light. I groan angrily, "Hey, you are the one who said you didn't want to have another sick day. Get dressed, I'm leaving in five minutes."

            I put on a jacket over my tank top and pull my hair up despite how messy it is. I feel, that considering the circumstances it was perfectly fine for me have a sloppy day. Who was any one person to judge me when they have their bad days as well? I untie my shoes and grab a pair of pants pulling them on before gathering my school books and running to the garage where Rita's car has just started. With my bag on my back and my shoes in my hand I lock the door and Rita starts to move out of the driveway. I watch the garage door close, hesitantly as if in any one moment a child or object could get in the way.

           In the corner of my eye I can see an odd color among the usual in the woods. My head turns and I see a person. Not just any person naturally. A harbinger perhaps? Nope. Lydia. What is she doing in the woods? Even better question, was she nude? Nope, just seeing things. I turn my head and follow her gaze as Rita continues to the school. Once she becomes smaller through the mirror my ears start to ring. I mess with them with my hands wanting for them to pop or something, anything for the sound to get out. But the ringing floods my ears. The closer we get to the school the louder the ringing gets. It causes me to have a headache and just minutes before we get to the school I start to feel sick. Why did I care if I had more sick days. I should want to miss school more often. But instead I told Rita and John I didn't want to miss anymore school. I might have an idea about the supernatural world, but there is a reason I can see harbingers...  I'm freakin' stupid

           Rita pulls into the school, and the second I open the door, the ringing stops. All of the uneasy feelings I had neglected me. I look around for an answer, and all I see is Lydia giving me a disapproving stare to my left. I thought she was in the woods. I run to a bathroom quickly and throw my head in my hands trying to figure out what was going on. Not just with me. But with this town. Everything should be made black and white but it isn't. Everything we think we know just gets thrown in our face. We thought that we humans were the only ones in this lonely world. But that simply isn't the case. And now... there are other handfuls of things that are here now. I wouldn't be surprised if aliens come and kill us before the end of our high school years.

           I leave the bathroom after I was done freaking out. I sit with the rest of the gang during class and they tell me how now it isn't Jackson we have to be worried about. A killing thing that has the ability to keep humans from running away. They are trying to tell me that there is a worse threat than that?

"What do you mean we don't have to worry. He seems..."

"He is being controlled by someone." Stiles explained silently to me as our instructor enters the classroom ready to begin.

"Of course." I collapse onto my desk in frustration. The teacher looks at me for a second causing a shift in seats as others around the class wonder what is going on. Because seeing someone lay their head down dramatically doesn't happen literally every single day.

           I get through the first class, but on the way to the others I had the terrible feeling someone was watching me. Of  course, everyone was watching me. The students bothered me the way they focused on me instead of what they usually focus on. There whispers were unnatural, and it seemed that the order of things had been screwed up. All because of me. But aside from those stares there was still something really bothering me. Someone was staring at me, and it was their gaze that was causing me to feel uneasy.

           I use my harbingers to try to locate the person, but the crowds in the hallway seemed to make it hard to focus, not to mention Matt had finally found me and wanted to talk. Not that its a new thing. He has always wanted to talk. About me. I don't know why I trust him. I shouldn't. I don't. But it is like every other part of me wanted to trust him. Why? Teresa. She trusted him. She still talks to him. They are good friends. He hasn't hurt her or done anything wrong. So I have to trust him.

"So, I was thinking..." Matt starts the second I acknowledge his presence. I zone out immediately knowing he was listing another theory of his about why Steven is a part of me. Lately, his theories have been that I am an alien with memory lost or that Steven is my alternate personality in a dormant disorder I may or may not develop, whatever that means. I should have never told him about how I was supposed to be stillborn. I hadn't really known that long anyway. I read it in Will's journal. Lets just say my parents didn't think I was human either for a while. But that was before they knew Steven.

"What!" I snap smacking Matt's hand away from my face, which was waving at me obnoxiously trying to take me out of my daze. It worked.

"S-sorry, just wondering what happened to you. I mean with the whole police business. What did they want to know about? Was it about the recent murders." At the mention of murders I felt my stomach flip. I almost forgot about the murders. Thanks for reminding me Matt.

"What are you talking about." and why the heck was he so jittery. I wonder, "They just wanted to know some things." I say giving myself a mental high five for avoiding the question.

"Oh, yeah."

"Did the police say the recent killings were murders, I've heard that they were animal attacks?" I say looking him in the eye.

"Did they? Well... I mean... I guess I heard some rumors around the school that they were."

"Did you?" I question feeling I am going to catch something that will prove his evilness. Not sure that I entirely wanted to though.

             It was a trick question. while what the police may have said can vary depending on the incident, Isaac had been suspected of murdering his father. So there is no reason for Matt to get nervous when I questioned his knowledge on the murders themselves. Unless there was something he knew and just wasn't telling me. If anything, he probably knows about the kanima and just doesn't want to scare me or something. Sure. That's definitely it.

"Oh, well, I guess there is no juicy story there." he says scratching his head before walking away. He has been leaving for no reason lately. I look around for police officers expecting them to come up out of nowhere again. Nothing.

"Aileen!" I spoke too soon. I turn to feel the fatal stare of Mr. Harris. So that was who was making me feel uncomfortable all of today.

"Aileen, with an A." I say silently as he marches up to me an angry look plastered on his face. Some students turn at the sound of my name. All I can do is wait for him to reach me and tell me what he wants.

"You skipped my class."

"It wasn't on purpose." I say the police escorting me out of the building flashing through my mind, " Considering the circumstances I couldn't really come to class at all."

"Yeah, but as my job as a teacher I need to discipline you or students will consider you a student I favor over others."

"I really think they would understand in this case. Besides, all students think you play favorites." I say my thoughts clearly focused on the way Harris is a significant amount nicer to Jackson than anyone else.

"Well then, I can give you a detention because you talked back to a teacher and because you made a scene in front of the entire school. Twice." you started it!

"That's bullshit and you know it." I say angrily. I could respect him if he gave me a detention for that.

"To be honest, I just want to get payback for the trouble you've caused this year. And what makes me despise you more is the fact that you hang around the sheriff's son."

"Do you have a problem with the sheriff." I search Harris' eyes for a sign. I saw it. Anger. That's right. He was in trouble considering his involvement with the Hale's situation. He is doing this because he hates the sheriff. And because he hates Stiles. Harris pauses in anger and I start to think again. Nope, he didn't confront me because he hates Stiles. Or at least that isn't entirely it. He actually does hate me as well.

"And what makes me despise you the most is the fact that you have some odd involvement with the police that no one else is to know about. Am I just supposed to respect that?"

"Yes." I answer sternly keeping him from speaking any more.

           There is a bang down the hallway and Harris turns to the direction trying to figure out if it is serious or not. The bell rang for class a while ago, so most of the students are in class. The banging continues and Harris grabs me by the wrist and drags me down the hall to investigate the noise. Is he even allowed to take hold of me like that? We pass a clock on the way and I realize class has been going on for thirty minutes now. I thought the bell just rang. I know I didn't argue with Harris for 30 minutes. What the heck is wrong me.

            Harris and I move down to the boys bathroom in time to see a fight between Scott and Jackson break out badly with Alison in the middle. Not to mention Matt was there. Wait, why was Matt there? I see Matt pick up a tablet and do something before putting it back down. There has to be something wrong with that kid.

           Jackson gets ready to fight Scott more, and I can say the same for Scott. If I didn't know better I would say that they were fighting to the death. Now that I think about it they might as well be. I have never seen any two people more angry. Both seemed on the verge of transforming... And Stiles tried to tell me that we didn't need to worry about Jackson because he was being controlled.

           Harris starts screaming, giving everyone there detention. Not that it mattered to me considering I was pretty sure I would have gotten a detention no matter what the circumstances. If anything, this is better than what could have happened.

***

           Detention is set in the library, and I end up next to Matt ready to figure out exactly why he had done whatever he did on Alison's tablet. We all sit in silence for a while and I see Stiles waving me over to him and I scoot my chair over to their table despite the fact that Harris would probably move me right back. Stiles, Scott and I start to discuss who we think could be controlling the kanima. Stiles seems set on Matt, but Scott explains there is no real motive there. I can't say I agree with him though. I am leaning towards Stiles in this situation. But of Scott says Matt isn't the master, then I will respect that. He usually is right after all... right?

           I look up at Harris to see him glaring at me. Once he got my attention he jabs his finger back to the table with Matt. I scoot my chair back over there. My chair screeches on the way back, and I want to kill myself. Way to draw more attention to myself. Stiles can hardly keep himself from laughing and Matt just looks at me confused. I get to my original spot and I smile at Matt, my hand covering my face from Harris.

"Is he still staring at me?" I ask him. He looks over to Harris and then back at me.

"Definitely." he responds causing gravity to pull my head to the desk.

"I want to die." Matt focuses on what he was reading and says the word kanima out loud after a while and I couldn't help but want to snoop after that. Matt catches me looking and gets flustered.

"Well, uh," Matt looks at me flustered.

"It's whatever. I can't say I haven't done it myself."

           Jackson leaves with Harris feeling sick. And Harris wants me to believe that he isn't playing favorites. Stiles, Scott and Erica talk about Jackson's past and I almost instantly think I should feel sorry for him. But I can't find it in me. Maybe if he would stop acting like a jerk around me. If he acted like an actual human being for once I might actually care about his life and whether or not he lives through this or not.

           Matt continues to study the new information he had stolen from Allison and fidgets around with his hands and his teeth. I wouldn't have bothered him if it hadn't been for the fact he grinds his teeth. I can deal with coughing, sneezing, and someone biting their nails. That is a piece of cake for me. But grinding their teeth. That had reached a line I was not willing to let anyone cross.

"Hey Matt." I say trying to get him to stop

"Hmm." he says hardly opening his mouth as he continues to make chitter-chatter with his teeth. I find something that will distract him for a second and pick up a water bottle lying on the floor. It wasn't my water, but he didn't need to know that.

"Do you want some water... you uh... your looking a little pale." I say shaking the water causing him to lift his head for a moment and widen his eyes.

"No thanks, I feel fine." he says but I continue to shake the water once more to see if he would take it.

"You sure?" I say no longer caring about the chattering, and more amused as to whether or not he will take the water that isn't even mine or his.

"Yep, I'm all good." he says.

"Okay." your no fun. But at least he stopped grinding his teeth.

           Harris and Jackson return, only before Harris leaving again leaving us chores. Why was Harris leaving? My questions go back even further. Why did he even follow Jackson out of the library when he wasn't feeling well? He has been close to Jackson lately, and given his apparent hatred for everyone, I wouldn't be surprised if he was controlling Jackson. But does he even know about the supernatural world? And if he did, why didn't he confront me about it? Everyone who knows something about the hidden world asks me about what the heck I am or what is wrong with me. I sit and think about this for a while trying to connect the dots.

           There is a loud crash. Harris wasn't even gone that long. I see Scott wolf out and the kanima start attacking people. Matt is unconscious on the ground and I can't help but feel a bit relieved and upset that he is basically no longer a suspect for the kanima's master. I don't think the master of a beast would be attacked by it's pet unless it wasn't tamed. By the looks of it Jackson doesn't seem tamed considering how he is taking down people one by one and acting like a possessed freak writing things on the wall.

            The kanima leaves seconds after it freaked out. It is a shame I couldn't help, and that I had zoned out for half of it. I walk over to the chalkboard and read his message. Stay out of my way or I'll kill all of you. I wish this town could go a day without dying.

           It doesn't seem possible that any one of us could have done this. Could control this. But it has to be one of us. Who?

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