Leaving ➸ n.h. fanfiction

Let's just say leaving isn't always that easy, and Paris isn't always that lovely.



1. Pas où j'appartiens

 Paris is one of those cities where you think nothing can go wrong.  Everything is supposed to be perfect in the city of love.  Well, for others, but not so much for me.  I'm not going to lie, the city is absolutely beautiful, the pictures don't do it justice at all.  It's truly magnificent.  

They say going to Paris with the person you love is supposed to be a good sign of a positive future with your lover.  They say Paris makes you fall even more in love.  Well maybe that's true for some people not in a situation much like myself.  For me, Patris is just stressing me out.  Instead of really enjoying Paris, I'm hiding in it.  Keeping hidden, laying low, and trying not to be too scared of anyone who looks my way.

I've lost myself, to be completely honest.  Having someone who you used to look up to, and cherish, suddenly want you dead, it's quite stressful.  It makes you question everyone and everything.  It makes you depressed.  Makes you not want to sleep or eat, for the fear of someone hurting you or the person you love is always on your mind.  You start to go crazy, not wanting to talk to anyone, staying in bed all day, and crying constantly.  I'm moving in and out of different apartments, one week after another- anything to stay hidden.  One suitcase is all I have, filled with multiple pairs of jeans and hoodies.  I practically live out of the thing.  

I'm scaring everyone around me.  My boyfriend, my brother, my best friends, and even the Queen of fucking England- no I'm not lying.  But I can't help it.  I've lost myself.  I'm losing Niall.  I'm losing Harry.  I'm losing Nicole, Liam, Louis, and Zayn.  I'm so scared.  I don't belong here.  This isn't home.  This isn't safe.  This isn't where I belong.  And lets just say, leaving isn't that easy, and Paris isn't always that lovely.


"Living out of cases,

packing up and taking off.

Made a lot of changes,

but not forgetting who I was."






It's offical guyssss, I started it.  You're welcome.  Btw, I do not have an updating schedule yet, hell I'm not sure if I'll ever have one.  

FRENCH LESSON OF THE DAY :  Pas où j'appartiens = not where I belong.  

All of the chapter titles will be in french.  

Please read the next chapter, it will be an authors note containing a lot of information that you guys might want to hear about, SINCE LIKE NONE OF YOU READ MY MUMBLES.  

anyways, read the next chapter pleaseeeee.  Love you.





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