the gun didn't work out

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  • Published: 9 Jun 2014
  • Updated: 29 Nov 2014
  • Status: Complete
So if you're reading this, you've found yourself a life story, mine to be exact. Don't be too shocked by what you read, others probably have it worse, but I do want to mention that suicide never the solution is. Unfortunately for me, there was no one to tell me this until after the gun didn't work out, so I had learnt it the hard way.


15. no appetite

As promised here's the new chapter! Please comment and tell me what you thought.

We sat down in front of the pizza place and attacked our food. The guys were laughing and talking to Angie and Mary while I kept quiet and ate my food.

''I see you girls bought half the mall, why do you chicks always need so much clothes?'', the guys started laughing and a smile crept up my face.

This was actually pretty nice, just laughing and chatting with friends. But then, of course, I heard a clique of girls laughing in annoying high-pitched voices. One of the friends of Boyd smiled and called them over, when the girls came into view I thought my heart had stopped.

There she was in all her disgusting self, Shelly. Mary and Angel immediately gotten on a sour face, I just hoped nothing would happen and stayed silent.

"Hey Phillip, why are you with that?'' said Phillip's friend, apparently, while she pointed at me.

I felt myself going back to what I used to feel before I met Mary and Angie, hollow, sad and just tired of people. I wanted to run away but I instead stayed silent.

''Uhm we're just eating some pizza. We met them by coincidence, you guys wanna join us?'', oh god please say no, please say no.

"Yeah sure we'll sit down right?''. So they all got some pizza and drinks and sat back down with us.

I was so scared off what she would say to Boyd that I just quickly ate my pizza in the hopes off getting out of here as fast as possible.

''Wow you really can eat can't you? You'll get fat you know.'' I heard the girl clique laugh at me.

I sat down my pizza, which was my first by the way, and put my head down. Angie was getting mad and Mary was already pissed off.

''We don't need to put up with this. If you want to leave we can just go you know?'', I shook my head, these were Mary's friends as well, plus it's not like I never heard it before.

''T-thanks Mary it's okay, j-just ignore them.''. Angie grabbed my hand and Mary grabbed the other, I just smiled my best fake smile at them and told them that I had to go to the toilet.

I stood up and walked around looking for the toilet signs, I finally found them and headed inside. Nausea took over as I remembered Shelly's words, that's right I'm just a fat glutton. I huddled over the toilet as my stomach emptied and I started to cry.

Why am I even here? I heard someone come in so I stood up and rinsed my mouth. I heard a jingle and looked at my phone. Mary: hey darlin we're going home, the idiot got mad and called Shelly a hooker :/ . Haha, I'm guessing that the idiot is Angel, she really is a hothead.

I quickly wiped my eyes, washed my hands and walked out of the bathroom back to the parking lot, is what I thought. I think I got lost because I didn't recognize this part of the mall and I couldn't find Mary or Angel or anyone! I got really panicked and after walking around for about 5 minutes I recognized the only person I didn't want to meet, Shelly and her bitch clique.

''Well if it isn't the fat emo piggy. You know, you're friends are just as pea brained as you are. You guys are just a collection of worthless assholes!'', everyone started laughing and I felt my eyes get wet, shit. I turned around and ran away from them, from their laughter, and most of all from their stupid faces. 

After another 10 minutes or so I finally found the parking lot and saw Mary and Angie standing near the car, they looked at me and started to smile and wave, Angel was wearing her usual goofy grin and Mary looked just a tad annoyed but smiled nonetheless.

I ran over and hugged them, they immediately got worried and I got concerned questions and looks from them. I said that I had gotten a fright from being lost, luckily they bought it. We got into the car and collected our stuff from Mary's house to go back to Angie's. Mary had to stay at her home because we had school tomorrow and we secretly knew that she really wanted to talk to her brother just in private. 

We headed inside and went to the kitchen, which was finally finished in our home (still feels weird to say ''our'' home) and we smelled something good. I peeked at who was cooking and we noticed that it was Drew, I quickly glanced at Angel who looked at me with raised eyebrows and walked up to him.

''Hey whatcha making?'', I was trying to hol back a smile at Angel's obviously distressed voice.

''Ah you're back how was it? Did you have fun? I'm making spaghetti bolognaise, it's going to be super tasty!''. I looked at the food and instantly got somber.

I don't think I'll be eating it, not because it wouldn't be tasty but because of what Shelly said. I think I really was getting fat. ''I-I'm sorry, uhm I'm not f-feeling w-well.'', I quickly walked up the stairs and to my room.


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