Broken Like I Am *Sequel to TMAIA*

I don't think I have ever cried this hard in my life.

"I'm sorry. I'm so so so so sorry," I cry and hold his hand.

"I'm done, Cammy. I can't do this anymore," he tells me and leaves me crying.

"Please. I'm sorry. So sorry," I whisper as I cry.

*This the sequel to Take Me As I Am. Please read that story first before you read this one. Thank you. :)*

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2. Bandages

Cammy's POV-

Pain. It demands to be felt. That's a quote from The Fault In Our Stars. Well it's actually a quote that Hazel Grace and Augustus got from An Imperial Affliction, but it's not a real story. John Green made it up. So technically it's a quote from a book that's in a book. But that book doesn't exist, it only does in the book. Make sense? Good.

Anyway, pain does demand to be felt. That's true. It doesn't matter what type of pain it is. Physical or mental. I'm feeling pain in both forms.

I have the physical pain from the broken glass. I have bandages all over my body. Bandages don't fix the problem, they just cover it up. That's what I've been doing with my mental pain.

I avoid it and cover it up with a bandage. Then one day, I'll take the bandage off and the scars will still be there. They won't heal unless I do something about them.

I'm covering up my problems so I don't have to deal with them, but one day that will come back to bite me in the butt when I realize I still need to address those problems.

 

"Cambam? Drew is here," Louis comes in and tells me.

"I don't want to see him," I tell him.

"What am I supposed to tell him? You've been avoiding him for a week. He's getting suspicious," he says.

"I don't want to see him. Let him get suspicious. It's over anyway," I say and then my eyes go wide as I realize at what I said.

"Cammy. What's over? What are you talking about?" he asks as he sits next to me looking concerned.

"Louis. I did something bad," I whine and hold onto him.

"Hey, it's okay. What happened? You know you can tell me anything," he says and looks in my eyes.

"When Blake was here, well he told me that he wrote the letters," I start.

"We know that. You told us," he says.

"There's more. Well he kind of kissed me," I say.

"That jerk. But you stopped it, right?" he looks at me and I feel really guilty.

"Well... Uh, I may have kissed him back," I whisper.

"Oh, honey. I'm sorry you have to go through this. I think you should talk to him," Lou tells me.

"Blake?" I ask disgusted. I never want to see that jerk ever again.

"No, Drew. Be honest with him. Honesty is the most important thing in a relationship," he says. I nod and he leaves to go get Drew.

 

When Drew comes in my room, I feel a million times worse. He looks exhausted and worried. I know that he was worrying about me, but I don't deserve that.

I kissed someone else.

"Oh Cammy, I missed you so much," he says and comes over to me. He kisses me and I fall in love with him all over again. Then I think of Blake and that kiss I shared with him. Blake was such an awful kisser. I have no clue why I kissed him back. I hate myself so much right now.

I push him away. He looks confused and hurt that I pushed him away.

"Babe, what's wrong?" he asks.

I fall back on my bed and begin bawling.

"I d-did something b-a-ad," I sob hysterically.

"What did you do?" he asks concerned.

"Drew, w-when Blake came over-er, he kissed m-me," I cry and can't even look him in the eyes.

"I'm going to kill him," Drew yells.

"I'm so sorry," I cry.

"Why? He's the one who kissed you," he holds me in his arms.

"I kissed h-him back," I whisper.

"No. No no no!" he yells and backs away from me.

"Drew, I'm so sorry!" I say and cry even harder.

"I trusted you! How could you do this to me?" he yells again.

"I didn't mean to! It just happened! I love you and only you. You know that," I tell him while I cry a waterfall.

"Now I'm figuring out it was only a lie," he says.

"It isn't a lie! Drew, don't leave me again!" I bawl. I don't think I have ever cried this hard in my life.

"I'm sorry. I'm so so so so sorry," I cry and hold his hand.

"I'm done, Cammy. I can't do this anymore," he tells me and leaves me crying.

"Please. I'm sorry. So sorry," I whisper as I cry.

Remember those bandages? Well I'm going to need another one. Because this pain demands to be felt.

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