I Used To Care

love at first kiss?
fakes, boys and romance.
not so typical teen love story.


2. chapter 2




3weeks later;

I haven't spoken about what happened yet, I've had nobody to tell, and Carl seamed to forget it ever happened but he hasn't told anyone either, we haven't spoken since.

I knew it, he ditched the doc martins the  second say, he changed, just like that, one kiss and you change your complete attitude, no more quirky little bands, more football mad and girl obsessed, I really thought he was different.

But it was my fault, i told him, the one thing only Tara knew.

I self harm.

When I told him he looked at me, and only one word escaped his mouth before he walked away. 



One day I was sitting peacefully in the cafeteria and I noticed Carl walk past, a girl under each arm laughing and telling them about some football game that he'd played in.

I looked at him, nearly sick of how immature he was acting, it was vile.

One of the girls under his arm turned around, and this, this is the icing on the cake. Tara.

She whispers something in carls ear a and they all walk over in my direction.

"Now this, this is the most boring person you will ever meet" says Tara laughing at me, holding herself against Carl.

I look down at my pasta, the urge to tip it over her head is iresistable.

"Oh Carl, let's leave this slut" she says grabbing his waist.

"He's a shit kisser" I say, she turns her head around.

"What" she says.

"He's a shit kisser" I say slightly a little louder.

"You can talk" he says pushing Tara's arm of himself.

"At least I'm not a man whore" I say, biting my lip and covering my mouth, using the old technique Tara used to use.

"Well at least I don't self harm" he says, his eyebrows raised.

By now there's pasta source dripping down his face as he bends over holding his crotch where I kicked him in the balls, and tara standing there holding her head where I yanked on it before walking away.


"Why the hell" says Carl getting closer to me as I cross the yard.

"Oh, come on" I say 

"Please tell me" he says, his eyebrows raised.

"I thought you were different" I say

"And I'm not" he asks me, 

"You were, 4 weeks ago, the day you kissed me" I say

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