In The Depths

Loneliness is like a deep dark void, with nowhere to go and nowhere to hide. As much as I try, I just get deeper into the depths of loneliness, and into the depths of my soul. I just want to get out. I don't deserve this.


21. Crooked Glasses And Twisted Realism

“You have a lot of explaining to do,” the policeman groans.

Will, Harry, and I are sat behind a large metallic desk. A husky police officer with dark skin stares us down. His blue eyes are ice against night sky as they pierce into our gazes, making us break a sweat. The whites of his eyes are veiny and pink, like he hasn’t slept in weeks. Although he’s threatening to get us in trouble, I feel a pang of sorryness for him. The bags under his eyes and his dilating pupils imply that he’s tired as hell.

The room’s walls are a dull white. Not to mention, it smells of stale styrofoam and doctor’s gloves. The policeman pulled us into his confined office after Will tried to kick his balls.

Yes, kick his balls.

So of course, Harry and I had to be dragged into this mess. I could be on stage right now, singing and acting with glee. But the weight of reality drags me down like chains on my ankle.

“So what I had a couple of beers?” spits Will. He lets out a loud and humiliating burp.

“Excuse me?” The policeman eyes Will with a menacing glance.

“Sorry for him!” Harry exclaims, raising his voice. “Don’t listen to Will. He’s an idiot.” Under the table, Harry kicks Will’s shin with an urge to shut him up. I hear the pained gasp of Will and the fluent string of hushed curse words.

Harry continues, “Will had this girlfriend named Jamie.”


The policeman reaches over the table and grasps Will’s wrist. Will lets out a groan. “Sir, one more outburst from you and you will be in the airport jail, begging your mummy to get your sorry butt out.”

Will nods. There’s an airport jail? That’s not the subject I should worry about. I should worry about getting Will back home safely and trying to forgive Harry for the angering act he’s done to me.

Harry sighs and rubs his temples. “Will had a girlfriend, Jamie. Apparently, he got some dumb idea that she’s desperate for him to fly over to America and waltz right into her arms.”

I speak up, “We promise he isn’t usually this foolish. I guess he’d just had a few too many drinks.”

A stretch of silence sits in the open air. The policeman stares us down with a bittersweet poison. He gnaws on his bottom lip, clearly pondering over the touchy subject.

“As you can tell, Will had no money. I don’t know why he decided it would be okay to hitch a flight across the ocean,” Harry rambles.

I nod slightly, hoping the policeman gets the point: Will is stupid but won’t do it again.

“What’s Jamie’s last name?”

Will blinks a couple of times before breathing out his answer, obviously afraid the man would snap at him for talking. “Rosetta.”

The man immediately pulls out one of the desk drawers with a snap. I almost jump out of my seat at the unexpected noise. He is soon holding a file, full of papers and names and flight numbers.

“Jamie Rosetta…” His husky voice enters a soft mellowness. He scans the file and the papers inside of it. His thumb flicks through the pages, and I wince at the idea of a gnarly paper cut. “I have good news for you.”

“What is it?” Will asks.

“Jamie Rosetta just took a flight to England during noon. She’s here now.”

Again, a lengthy silence presses against our skulls. I catch of glance of Will from my peripheral vision. He looks completely awe-struck, as if his tongue has been ripped out of his mouth, disabling him to talk. Harry looks just as surprised as his lips curl into a grin. I, meanwhile, don’t have enough knowledge of this magical girl, Jamie, to be as amazed as they are.

The man pulls out a burly walkie-talkie from his beltline. A rough sound of static exits the device as he pulls it up to his lips.

“Bring her in. Subjects have heard the news.”

The static sound buzzes through the room again, followed by a gruff, “Yes sir.”

Will speaks up, clearly jittery from the exhilarant news. His voice is oddly high- pitched and shaky. “She’s here? Now? In the airport? Like, right now?”

The man sighs with the slightest grin. I could tell his reputation is the big, tough policeman. He doesn’t want his secret pleasure of seeing young love to ruin his burly appearance. Although I find it a bit pathetic that he’s embarrassed to smile at Will’s romantic life, I smile too.

“Yes. In fact, she just landed here today.”

Will sucks in a breath, eager to ask another question,

The man speaks before Will can. “I don’t know anything about her, Will. I don’t know why she’s here, the airport she got here from, and I didn’t even know her name until a minute ago.”

“Okay,” Will breaths. “Okay.”

A few minutes pass before a man dressed in a suit with a police badge on his breastbone and a very confused girl walks in. My common sense tells me that this is the marvelous Jamie Rosetta in the flesh.

First thing’s first: She’s very tall. Even without heels, I can tell she’s about a head taller than me. Her hair is cut short, way short, styled upwards so it reaches the ceiling. Instead of brown, blonde, or even black, her short hair is colored a mellow lilac. Her clothes consist of sweatpants and a sweatshirt, both dark gray. I get why Will is so obsessed with her. She is pretty attractive, even from my queer eyes.

“Am I getting arrested? I swear, I didn’t smuggle anything. Pat me down. I swear, dude.” As she talks, she faces the man next to her, using confused and angry gesticulations.

“Just turn your head, lady. We have a desperate teenager waiting for you.”

“What the-?” Her voice cuts off as Will hugs (tackles) her. She squeaks as Will wraps his lengthy arms around her, almost stepping on her toes with his Chuck Taylors.

“Will!” she exclaims.

Okay, I admit, this is kind of cute. Although it’s embarrassing how clumsy Will is and how surprised Jamie is, it’s really adorable.

“Jamie,” he breathes, holding her at both her shoulders. “I’ve been trying to get in contact and text you and Skype you and be with you and-”

“Okay Romeo!” The dark skinned policeman pushes Will and Jamie to the side. “I’ll let you kids talk things out, and if you try to run away or do anything illegal, then well, I’d prefer to just show you. I’ll be coming back in ten minutes.” And with that, he and the other policeman left the room.

“Will,” Jamie steps back a bit. A strand of lilac hair falls out of its hold and falls into her eyes. She wipes it away, followed by a big breath. “If you’re still, I don’t know, in love with me or whatever, you can’t be.”

I feel Harry tense beside me, and suddenly the stress in the room is doubled.

“What?” Will’s voice is barely a whisper. He nervously bites his fingernail.

“I don’t love you anymore, Will.” She looks down at her feet and runs her black fingernails through her bristly hair. “I know you’ve been trying to get in touch with me because you love me still, but it’s been two years. I’ve… moved on. It’s as simple as that.”

The poor boy stumbles back, clearly in pieces. He swallows audibly and smooths out his Avengers shirt. By now, his glasses are askew across the bridge of his nose, topping off his look of devastation. “D-d-do you have a new boyfriend now or something?” His bottom lip trembles, but he quickly bites it so he keeps his traits of masculinity.

“Not exactly.” Jamie steps closer to Will and takes his hand. I can see her squeezing it. “Since I moved to America, I sort of found out who I was. I went to college, got a job, and along the way…” She trails off and let’s go of Will’s hand. “Don’t get mad or anything, Will. I don’t have a boyfriend. I have a girlfriend.”

The three of us are driven to silence again. That was probably the opposite of what we were all expecting. Will crumples to his knees, and, like always, acts like he’s in a soap opera.

“Why do all my closest friends have to be gay?”

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