Change My Mind

I don’t know if I’ll ever love someone as great as Harry so that’s why I never want to forget this feeling. That’s why I’m scared of moving on. I don’t want to forget what it feels like to be in love with Harry Styles, especially the feeling I got when Harry Styles used to love me back.


121. Intimate

Lily's POV

Harry tugs me behind him, his hand clasped in mine tightly as we make our way through the crowd of paparazzi and fans. Two bodyguards flank us, keeping us safe until we reach the door to the hotel. There are another two security guards stationed at the front doors, surely only letting guests to the hotel pass through.

They have a clipboard in their hands and I'm assuming it's the guest list for the party. We're let through without any trouble, the noise from outside quieting immensely as soon as the doors shut behind us.

Harry had rented out the penthouse for the party so we take the elevator all the way up to the top floor, where were met with another two security guards as soon as we step outside.

Security is tight for this party. I'm sure there are people who are going to be trying to get in and I wouldn't be surprised if people already have.

The security guards nod to Harry as we walk past them and towards the grand doors. Harry slides the key card into the slot and opens the door, guiding me inside. The party planners, the bartender, the DJ and a few guests are already here. I take off my pea coat, giving it to the person working at coat check.

"You can leave your purse with your jacket if you want," Harry says. "I can keep your phone in my pocket. Just so you don't have to carry it around the whole night."

It's not like I'm going to need my ID or my money here. I only really need my phone. Plus, I don't want to be holding my clutch the whole night so I nod in agreement and take out my phone and hand it to him. I hand the person behind coat check my clutch and she keeps it safe inside my coat.

I turn around and look around the room. The party is definitely an A-list party. It's extravagant but not too flashy.

I look around at the guests and one of them immediately catches my eye, making me gasp.


I give Harry a quick squeeze of his arm, excusing myself before I rush towards my best friend. He turns his head, a smile spreading across his face when he sees me. He excuses himself from the people he was conversing with before he walks towards me.

As soon as I reach him, I wrap my arms tightly around him as he wraps his around my waist, lifting me slightly into the air.

He groans. "I missed you so much, Lil."

"I missed you, too."

He places me back onto the ground and we pull away, wide smile stretched across our faces. I haven't seen him in almost a month. Of course I miss him. I'm still used to seeing him every day like I did in the summer and he's been busy with his album and promotion that we rarely get to talk to each other on the phone.

"You look great," he says. "I'm guessing the granny dress I sent you got lost in the mail. I'm sure you would've worn that instead."

I roll my eyes. Trust Ed to already annoy me not even a minute since I got here. However, him and I both know that I'm just as good, if not more, at annoying the other.

I smirk as I glance back up at him. "Oh. No, don't worry. I got it. I'm planning on wearing to your wedding with Matti."

His smirk is quickly wiped off his face, just like I was anticipating. A scowl replaces it and he rolls his eyes and shoves my shoulder.

"I will lock you in the bathroom if you continue to be like this, especially when she gets here."

I laugh. "Don't worry. I honestly won't ruin tonight. I like you two together. You won't here another word from me about Matti for the rest of the night."

I can see him struggling to hold back a smile but it forces its way through his lips before he takes me in for another hug.

"I really do miss you, though. It's honestly so boring at home without you."

I laugh. "I miss you, too."

We pull away.

"But I'm planning on moving here after I graduate. I honestly loved it here."

"You mean, you love it cause Harry's here. Well, when he's not touring."

I roll my eyes with a smile. "Yeah, yeah. And you, too."

"Okay," he says with sarcasm.

I mean, he's right about the fact that one of the main reasons I want to move here is because of Harry but even before I met Harry, it was a dream of mine to move here to pursue my career and also because of Ed.

I jump slightly when I feel an arm being wrapped around my waist and I look up to see Harry beside me.

"Hey, Ed," he says, letting go of me for a second to give him a hug before he holds me again.

"Hey, Harry."

Harry then looks down at me. "Your friends are here."

Ed and I look towards the door and sure enough, my friends are there, getting their coats checked in.

Suddenly, Ed walks past me and walks straight up to Matti.

My smile widens as I watch them hug and then I see her introducing him to the others. Afterwards, Ed gestures towards me and they all wave to me. I take Harry's hand and tug him with me towards them.

"Hey, guys," I say. "Glad you all could make it."

I go around and hug everyone before I stand beside Harry, who rests his hand on the small of my bare back, feeling the warmth from his touch spreading to the rest of my body.

"Thanks for coming, guys," Harry says. "Drinks are over there, and some snacks on the table right beside it. Just make yourselves comfortable...and have fun."

They all nod back to him before they all make their way to the bar.

I turn in my spot, facing him and wrapping my arms around his neck. His hand starts to roam slowly around my back and his other one rests on my waist.

"I don't know how I'm going to be able to keep my hands off of you tonight," he grumbles.

I smile at him and press my body against him more. "Who says you can't?"

He chuckles. "Well, I'm sure you're going to get tired of having me following you around like a puppy the entire night."

I start raking my fingers through the back of his hair. "I wouldn't mind that."

His smile widens and then he leans down and places a kiss on the tip of my nose and then my lips. He pulls me closer to him and applies more pressure to the kiss. Suddenly, I feel his fingers digging into my side, tickling me. I start laughing against his lips and I can feel him smile.

I try to push him away from me but he just tightens his arms around me and continues to tickle me.

I manage to pull my lips away, laughing and catching my breath at the same time as he buries his face into the crook of my neck. He stops tickling me. Instead, he just sways me gently from side to side.

I place a quick kiss on his neck before I reluctantly pull away, seeing more and more guests start to arrive.

"Babe, you should greet your guests. I'll go get us some drinks."

He nods and gives me a peck on my lips before sliding his arms off of my waist.

"I'll be real quick," he says.

I nod and watch as he walks over to the guests that had just arrived. I head over to the bar and order and rum and coke for Harry and a strawberry daiquiri for myself. As I'm waiting for it to be mixed, Liam and Sophia appear beside me.

"Hey, Lily," Liam says.

"Hey!" I hug him before I hug Sophia. "Hey, Soph."

"Hey, Lily. You look hot," she says, looking down at my outfit.

"Thanks. So do you," I reply. She's wearing a simple red dress but she pulls it off so well.

"So, I saw a foosball table over there," Liam says. "Fancy having that rematch?"

I raise an eyebrow at him and smile. "I hope you've been practicing. I wouldn't want to embarrass you in front of your girlfriend."

Liam playfully glares at me while Sophia laughs at him. The bartender hands me mine and Harry's drinks and I thank him as I take it.

"You only won last time cause something got in my eye."

I roll my eyes. "Okay," I say with sarcasm. I take a sip of my drink and look around for Harry but see him still talking to his guests.

I turn back to Liam. "Are you ready, Payno?"

He grins at me and rubs his hands together. "I was born ready."

He leads the way as Sophia and I look at each other and hold back our laughter as we follow him. I see the foosball table off in the corner and thankfully, no one's using it. Liam stands on one side and I stand on the other. I place my drinks on the table beside us.

"Sophia, you'll be the referee, okay? And I know that Liam is your boyfriend but I'm sure you'll be unbiased."

She laughs. "Of course. I've heard stories of the last time you played against each other so I know what to expect."

I laugh along with her as Liam playfully glares at her.

"Alright, are you both ready?" she asks, standing at the end of the table.

Liam and I nod, ours eyes now focused on the table. Sophia drops the ball in the middle and Liam and I quickly start hitting it around. It goes back and forth a few times until Liam scores the first point.

He gets excited, jumping up and down as he shouts. Sophia jokingly tells him to calm down and once he does, she drops the ball again and Liam and I hit it back and forth until I score in his net.

We each take turns scoring until it's game point. I look up at him and take in his slight panic-stricken face. I could tell that he was trying hard, most likely to impress Sophia, so, little did he know, I went easy on him and let him get some points in when I could've easily scored on him.

I focus back on the table, Sophia's hand hovering over it with the ball in her hand. A small crowd has formed around us, cheering for both sides. Louis and Niall tease Liam every time I get a point in and even when he scores, they joke around saying that it was a lucky shot.

That, along with the look on Liam's face every time I would score, I decide how to end this match. Sophia drops the ball and I start it off by keeping the ball close to his net but not actually scoring. Now, I let him take the advantage. I purposely miss the ball, allowing Liam to hit it back to my side. I keep one hand on the goalie rod, moving it back and forth for show. He has the ball with his players closest to the net and I can already tell he's going to try to score.

He spin the rod swiftly and every one watches as the ball shoots past my immobile goalie and into the net.

Everyone shouts, including Liam who yells as he jumps up and down and punches his fist in the air. I grin up at him and cross my arms, watching him as his face lights up and then goes over to a proud-looking Sophia and hugs her.

Sophia congratulates him as Louis and Niall walk up to me.

"You let him win that, didn't you?" Louis whispers as he smirks, only loud enough for the three of us to here.

I glare slightly at him and look over his shoulder to make sure Liam didn't hear. Liam is still celebrating in excitement to even hear anything around him.

I look back up at Louis. "Shh! I did not!"

He raises his eyebrows at me. "Liar. Even when the game started I could tell that you were holding back."

Was it really that obvious? I know that Liam couldn't tell but it must've been obvious to everyone else.

My shoulders slump and I release a sigh. "Okay, fine. I did. But look at him. He's practically glowing. He's been dying to win since the first time I beat him. I couldn't do that to him again, especially in front of Sophia."

"Don't worry. We're not going to tell him. I think it's really nice of you to do that for him."

"Just hope his ego doesn't get too big," Niall adds, making us laugh.

We quickly shut up as soon as we see Liam walking up to us.

"Great game, Lily. See? I told you I could beat you if it was just us two."

I playfully roll my eyes and cross my arms again.

"Yeah, whatever," I grumble dramatically, before I smile up at him and hold my hand up for a high five, which he returns.

"Let me at least get you a celebratory drink. On me."

"It's open bar."

Every laughs as I raise an eyebrow at him. Suddenly, an arm rests around my shoulders and I look up to see Harry smiling at me.

"What's going on over here?" he asks.

"I just beat your girlfriend in foosball!" Liam answers excitedly. "Reigning champion has now reclaimed his spot!"

Sophia scolds him as he pulls her in for a hug. Everyone knows it's all for fun so it's not like I'm offended.

"It's okay, baby," Harry says, looking down at me. "You'll get him next time."

He places a kiss on my temple and rubs his hand along my arm. I exchange glances with Louis and Niall, mentally telling them not to tell anyone what I did. The less people that know, the less chances of Liam finding out and crushing his feelings.

"I got your drink," I say, reaching over for his drink and handing it to him.

"Thanks, babe." He takes a drink, licking his lips and smiling at me. I take my own drink and take a sip of it, wanting to take things slowly tonight.

Harry keeps his arm around me as we socialize with everyone at the party. We have our own game of foosball, one that I win. We play beer pong against Niall and Louis, and with my inexperience with it, Harry and I lose. And with losing at beer pong, comes the increased intake of alcohol and the even more increased buzz filling both of our bodies.

Harry's hand now slides down to rest on my waist, occasionally gliding lower onto my bum and giving a light squeeze before moving back up.

I decide to stop drinking for a while so I place my glass at the bar and turn to face Harry fully. He downs the rest of his drink, placing his glass beside mine before resting both of his hands around my waist and burying his face into my neck.

The alcohol in our bodies surely has something to do with the intimate touches between us that we usually wouldn't put on display in front of other people but my mind is too hazy to even stop myself or him.

We start slightly swaying to the beat of the music and he eventually pulls me onto the middle of the dance floor. I turn around in his arms, my back flush against his chest as we start dancing. I sweep my hair to one side and his lips quickly land on my shoulder, just like I was hoping.

His hands move around my stomach and my waist, not stopping for even a second, as I move my hips, my bum moving against his crotch. I keep my hands on top of his as I drop my head back, giving him a silent plea for his lips to move to my neck, which he does obligingly.

His one hand moves lower down my stomach, dangerously close to where I'm aching for him now, especially when I start to feel him harden against my lower back. My hand reflexively moves up to grab the back of his neck, pulling him closer as he continues to move his lips around my sensitive skin.

Unable to resist anymore, I turn in my spot, facing him and winding my arms around his neck. I place his one leg in between both of mine and he jerks it forward slightly, applying pressure against my heat. I feel him once again, this time on my upper thigh as we continue to grind against each other to the music.

His hands roam my back, his fingers digging into my slowly sweating skin, pulling me as close to him as possible.

I scratch my fingernails up into the back of his hair and his eyes flutter before he swoops down and crashes his lips into mine. Our mouths move feverishly, tongues darting out, tasting and teasing.

I still have half a mind to know that people can see us but I tone down the kiss until we have to catch our breaths, our foreheads resting against each other's.

We continue to move against the music, still being able to hide the fact that we're grinding against each other's leg. The song moves onto the next and I start to feel the stickiness of my body from the sweat.

"I need you," he breathes, his lips barely brushing against my own.

My heart pounds in my chest at the conviction in his voice. It's filled with so much desire, need and arousal that I could practically feel it. I know that the alcohol is partly to blame for both of our behaviour but, regardless, my self-control weakens as Harry continues to touch me.

Unable to answer him with words, I lean up and lock our lips in a lingering kiss. I know he's taking that as my answer because he pulls away and takes my hand, tugging me out of the dance floor.


Like I said on kik, the next chapter is already finished! I'm planning on posting it tomorrow but if this chapter gets the 40 votes and 15 comments (from 15 different people) by tonight, I will post it tonight :)

So, get to voting and commenting! :)

Thanks for reading!

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