This is a monologue that i have created. I feel that it will help people to understand what is really going on in victims of bullying's head.
This what used to go on in my head.
Hope you enjoy.


1. The beach

The beach is beautiful. Not beautiful in the way people normally mean it. You have to be truly unhappy to see the true and utter beauty of a beach.

The way the sand squidges under your toes. The way the sun reflects its rays onto the open sea and sands. The way the rocks spread at random far, as the eye can see to create an air of wonder and magic.

Its enough to make you forget. Its almost enough to make you forget all the pain and suffering that’s really happening, in the real world. Its almost like a dark side of yourself...and it will spread like cancer. It'll infect every memory, bone...every happy place, until it kills you.

I come to the sand because it makes me forget, even if its for a little while. I know nothing can harm me here. No one on the beach wants to harm me. They're all doing the same, walking a dog or going on a sentimental walk or run. They cant harm me in such a beautiful sanctuary. The sun will always be your reassurance of that.

They say every cloud has a silver lining. My silver lining will always be this beautiful beach. Every time I come here I know that the sun is now my protector and no one can hurt me. And I know, as I walk towards that circle in the sky, every move I make it gets bigger and brighter. It makes you think that life may move on.

But I know now that the pain and suffering will take over like cancer. And when this day comes, the beach won't work the same. It wont allow me to forget, even for a short while. It will no longer be my safe haven, it will become another bleak and dark place.

When I die. No matter how or when it is I really hope I’ll be reincarnated as a beach, just like this one. So I can give the same people, the same victims. I can give them that sense of hope, magic and beauty that the beach gives me. Even if its for a short while.

And when that time comes, for me to walk off into the sunset, along with my sisters and brothers. Which may be soon. I may not have the courage to keep strong any more and I know it will happen. But I will shine brighter than any of them. I will be the one to make a difference, even if its from millions and millions of miles away. I will help each and every person to feel the same way that I feel now.


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