Tiffany has been abused in many different ways throughout her life. In this book, she tells her stories of domestic abuse, Jacob, Elis, and the worse, Freddie. Freddie is her current boyfriend but is very abusive and attached to her. She doesn't think she'll ever be able to get away from him.

This is my way to reach out to people who have been through abuse like I have. These stories are based off mine but some are rearranged and I've changed some info. To anybody who's being abused or have been abused PLEASE GET HELP & REPORT IT! I can't seem to stress this enough.
National Domestic Violence Hotline-1-800-799-7233
Rape Abuse & incest National Network-1-800-656-4673
National Center for Victims of Crime and National Stalking Resource Center-1-800-394-2255
National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline-1-800-331-9474
and there are MANY more
credit to in-dissoluvel.tumblr.com for cover photo


6. The first time

In the second semester, after the whole Jacob cheating on me incident, I couldn't stop crying and feeling like complete shit. I couldn't get over him no matter what I did. I know this may sound stupid knowing I was only in the eighth grade but this is honestly how I felt. I couldn't stop thinking about him, never mind the fact he broke my trust in him. Jazzmyn really tried her best to make me feel better and make me get over him, but I couldn't seem to do either. She took me to different parties to new guys, but that just ended so badly. I would get drunk, flirt with a whole bunch of guys, end up making out with one of them, feel terrible, Jazzmyn would take me to her house to blow off some steam, I'd wake up with a hangover, and then we'd do it again the next weekend. There were a few times when Jacob would go to the same parties as us and I'd follow him from a distance and try to look like I was having an amazing time without him. Then one day he was there without me noticing. I was already starting to get over him and would actually have a good time going out. I was actually getting pretty close with this kid Elis (he'll come up again soon). Elis and I were playing beer pong together and he was standing very close to me. I felt warm comforting arms tightening around my body. I felt a head in between my shoulder and neck, and then a kiss on my neck. I love when guys do that. I turned around to give him a kiss and saw Jacob's face.

I immediately pushed him away from me, even though I still kind of wanted to give him that kiss. I started to walk outside but he blocked the front door.

"You can either move out of the way or be pushed out of the way!" I yelled at him with anger.

"Look I'm sorry about what happened and you should know we don't talk anymore." He said with a sad expression

"I know we don't talk now get out of my way!" I yelled as I pushed him.

"I meant me and that girl." He said while following me as I walk away.

"That's great; I'm glad you got rid of the whore!"

"Don't treat me like that give me another chance, please!" He grabbed my wrist, turned me around looked me in the eye and pleaded again.

"What you did was truly unforgivable and I won't be able to get over it." I answered.

"I know it was, and it still is; that's why I'll make sure not to do it again."

"I can't go out with you again!"

After a long while of arguing, my dumb ass agreed to go out with him again. Why? I have no idea, but that was one of the worst mistakes I could ever make.

The night after that, I went to his house. Let me just remind you that it hasn't even been 24 hours since I said we'd go out but he still managed to mess up in one of the worst ways possible; even worse than when he cheated on me. When I got to his house, there weren't very many people, but everybody was either smoking, drinking, or both. I was kinda pissed off right when I got there about everybody being faded, but I kept my cool. Jacob gave me a hug and a kiss, which made me uncomfortable because there was the scent of cigarettes & alcohol on his breath and because we just barely started dating since he cheated on me. I was hanging out with him for about twenty minutes not, planning on leaving soon, and then he asked me to get him another beer.

"Umm you can get it." I replied with an attitude.

"But that's you're here for." Jacob said trying to sound sweet.

"Well I don't feel comfortable with you drinking anymore. You're already drunk."

"Not really, just go get me another one please."


"Go get it already, I'm not playing!"

"Neither am I. I don't want you drinking anymore, and if you still are, you can get the drink yourself."

"Get the fucking drink. You're the girl; you take orders. I'm the man; I give them." I stared at him in shock.

"You're such a disgusting person. I don't know why I agreed to come or even be with you!"I said while grabbing my things.

"And where the hell do you think you're going? You still haven't given me my drink!"

"I'm leaving, so get your lazy ass up and get it yourself!"

His friends looked at me then at him, in complete and utter shock. He got out of his chair and started walking towards me.

"Oh so you can get up!" I said sarcastically, "But just so you know the refrigerator's that way!" I said pointing in the opposite direction.

"I know it is you dumb bitch. Now get your ass over there, get me my beer, sit your stupid ass back down, and shut your fucking mouth like the bitch you are." He looked me dead in the eye with a calm tone the whole time.

"No." I said in the same tone while getting in his face, like he did with me.

He stepped back a few steps and punched me right in my face.

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