※※※Quotes To Remember※※※

When you are bored, in need of some creatively hidden advice, or just looking for cool quotes, flip through this and your problems will be solved!

Warning: <<<the accuracy of the things mentioned above about the quotes in this blurb are not guaranteed>>>

Ps. I do not own any of these quotes whatsoever!


28. Quote 28 (The one with all the drool-worthy sweets)

Category: Yummy yummy in my tummy!

1. ''You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.'' -George Carlin

2. ''I want to get a vending machine, with fun sized candy bars, and the glass in front is a magnifying glass. You'll be mad, but it will be too late.'' -Mitch Hedberg

3. ''This Halloween, the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him.'' -Conan O'Brien

4. ''A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just give me the candy.'' -Demetri Martin

5. "You look like a peanut chew." -unkown

6. "Anyone who uses the phrase 'easy as taking candy from a baby' has never tried taking candy from a baby." -Unknown

7. "You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jellybeans." -Ronald Reagan

8. "Knowledge was like candy: you never turned it down, especially if you didn't have to work too hard to get it." -Robert Liparulo, House of Dark Shadows

9. "People are like M&Ms. They come in a variety of colors, they're hard on the outside, and full of obscene yumminess on the inside." -Michael Makai, Domination & Submission: The BDSM Relationship Handbook

10. "Did you know that at one time trick-or-treating was stopped? It's true. During World War II children were not allowed to trick or treat because there was a sugar shortage." -Linda Bozzo, Kooky Halloween Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone

11. "There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate." -Linda Grayson

12. "Strength is the capacity to break a Hershey bar into four pieces with your bare hands - and then eat just one of the pieces." -Judith Viorst, Love & Guilt & The Meaning Of Life, Etc

13. "Cotton candy, laced in gold. Stack that money, sushi roll. Bottles up, feeling throw'd. V.I.P it, overload." -Iggy Azalea

14. "Of all the consumer products, chewing gum is perhaps the most ridiculous: it literally has no nourishment - you just chew it to give yourself something to do with your stupid idiot Western mouth.

Half the world is starving, and the other's going, 'I don't actually need any nutrition, but it would be good to masticate, just to keep my mind off things." -Russell Brand, My Booky Wook

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