Totes MacGyver's Collection of Short Stories/The Totes Collection, vol. 1

Chapter 1 - THe RuMpas pUmpAs
Chapter 2 - Toopy the Tumbleweed del Truth and Wise Decisions
Chapter 3 - The Holiday of Regular Grass Gathering
Chapter 4 - Norman the (soon to be) Meatball Sandwich
Chapter 5 - George: Not an Ostrich
Chapter 6 - Ivana the Roast Beef Sandwich


4. Norman the (soon to be) Meatball Sandwich - Paul

     Once upon a time in a supermarket in a small town in Northern Canada, there was a package of small rolls of bread. This package of bread rolls was kept near all the other packages of bread rolls, to make shopping more convenient and less time consuming for the customer. Norman -- one of the bread rolls in the many packages of bread rolls -- was waiting anxiously for his package of bread rolls to be purchased. He desperately felt the need to hear from a customer, "Hmm, these bread rolls look better than all the rest of the bread rolls. I think I will purchase them."

     This was only a fantasy for Norman though, because unfortunately, he had been placed in the same package as Hubert, the deformed bread roll. Hubert was often made fun of for his deformity by the other rolls. Norman though did not make fun of him. He was only angry at Hubert because, if it weren't for him, they're package could be picked by a shopper. With their expiration date quickly approaching, Norman had given up all hope of ever being purchased.

     The day before they were supposed to be thrown in the trash for not being purchased soon enough, a shopper came by they're isle. He came closer and closer to the bread section. Norman was becoming more and more confident that he and the other rolls in his package would be picked. But Norman soon realized that he had gotten his hopes up for nothing, when the shopper picked up the package next to them. As soon as he did this, he slipped, and dropped all the rolls on the floor. "Oh no!" said the shopper, "It looks like I will need to pick a different package." Norman realized it was his lucky day, when the shopper picked up Norman's package. All the rolls were so exited.

     When the shopper got home, he said, "Hmm, I am getting hungry. I think I will make myself a meatball sandwich on one of the delicious rolls I bought at the store today." He reached into the package, and took out Hubert. "Hmm, this roll doesn't look good," so he threw it in the trash. Little did the rolls know, that Hubert, was the lucky one. He took out another roll (Joshua) and put the rest in his pantry. The other rolls (not knowing how painful and unpleasant it is to be eaten) were saying how lucky Joshua was, when they heard the screams of him coming from the kitchen. "No! No! Please don't do th-" **crunch** The rolls didn't know what was happening to Joshua, but at that moment they realized, they did not want to be eaten.

     Every day Norman had to hear the screams of another one of his friends, until finally, his day came. The man took Norman out of the bag and placed him on his counter top. He got out a big knife and began to cut Norman in half. This was very painful to Norman, but he handled it very well. The man stuffed meatballs inside of Norman and was ready to eat. He lifted Norman up and began to take a big bite out of him, when a bee stung him in his thumb. "Ow!" said the man as he dropped Norman. Seeing that Norman had been soiled with all the germs on the floor, he said, "Oh well," and he tossed Norman in the trash, where he saw Hubert, and a few other rolls that had the same thing happen to them.

     Norman and the rest of the rolls dedicated the rest of their lives to warning bread rolls about the dangers of being eaten. Unfortunately, they could not do this, because they were in a trash bag and had no arms or legs, so they couldn't move. So they made themselves comfy and lived the rest of their lives happily inside a trash bag at the dump.



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