Feel Again (Louis Tomlinson)

{Book 3 - COMPLETE} All Marley Pennington wanted to do since her freshman year of high school was to turn her life around. To be someone she always wanted to be, and when she gets her dream job, everything seems to be headed in the right direction.
But Louis Tomlinson is another story. He's alone, afraid, and just wanting everything to go back to normal, before everything was ruined. Marley, a well-liked and cheery person tries to change Louis' look on life and love.

"Yeah with you
I can feel again
I'm feeling better ever since you know me
I was a lonely soul but that's the old me"


25. Marley

Chapter 25 - Marley

"Hey Zayn," I smile, sitting down. It's still pretty early; therefore, everyone is still sleeping. I am surprised he is up before everyone else. It's just after eight in the morning.

"Hey, what's going on? You're usually sleeping until at least nine." He smiles.

I shrug. "I don't know, guess I'm excited to see Cleveland, I suppose." I sit down next to him on the couch.

"It's a great city," Zayn lays back, putting his feet up on the coffee table.

"When are we getting there?" I ask.

"Not long, we're almost there. We had to stop in the middle of night so the driver could sleep."

"Oh. Have you talked to Liam lately? I miss him, we don't talk anymore." I say. It's true, I'm not really close to Liam and he's a great person, I know.

"Not really, he's always with Parker." He says.

"She's great." I smile.

"She is, Liam's lucky to have her. I'm surprised he found her, considering." Zayn frowns, looking out the window on the other side of the bus.

"Considering what?" I ask.

Zayn's eyes widen. "Sorry, I wasn't supposed to say that. We don't really talk about it, Liam doesn't like when we bring it up. Harry doesn't either."

What is he talking about? "What do you mean? Please tell me, Zayn. Parker is my best friend and so is Harry, all you guys are and I care."

"Okay, well you have to promise not to bring it up; it's not something that any of us like to mention." Zayn winces and bites his lip.

"I promise," I say quickly.

"Okay, well not long after Harry and Amabel started dating they came over to Liam's place and this was when Liam and Danielle were still dating. Liam and Danielle had gotten in a fight over something, and you know Liam, he doesn't like conflict very much so after she left he started drinking a little and..." He trails off. Liam was drinking? I find that hard to believe.

"And?" I press.

"Liam brought Amabel upstairs, and he tried to kiss her...it was pretty bad." Zayn whispers.

My eyes widen. "Liam did that?" Liam is so nice and so in love with Parker I can't picture him getting drunk and forcing himself upon Amabel.

"Yeah. When Harry found out he yelled and left, the rest of us heard from downstairs. Liam doesn't like to talk about it; it was a bad time for him." Zayn tells me.

"Are he and Amabel okay?"

"I guess, yeah. He apologized and he was drunk so he doesn't remember all of it but they've both moved and don't talk about it."

"Wow," I breathe. "That's crazy, I had no idea."

"Don't take it personally that no one told you. If someone says anything it gets really awkward for Liam and Harry, even Parker. Parker knows and because she loves Liam, we've all worked it out but it's still a touchy subject." Zayn props himself up so he is sitting upright.

"I can tell," I nervously chuckle.

"So do you like this job?" Zayn smiles at me.

"Oh yes," I gush, and proceed to tell him about how much I love it. "It's perfect for me, it's absolutely wonderful." This really is the job for me. I am doing what I love with my friends by my side.

Zayn listens intently and I enjoy spending time with him. He's very good-looking and if I wasn't completely and utterly in love with one of his band mates I wouldn't mind spending all my time with him. But I wouldn't give up Louis, although he's not mine to give up, since I'm not sure what to call us at the moment. That's the most frustrating part.

Zayn proceeds to tell me something that I didn't expect: he and Amabel kissed. "Are you serious?" I whispered frantically, trying to keep my voice at a reasonable register.

"Yeah, it was a mistake though. I know you're going be around more so I thought you should know so you're not caught off guard." He explains.

"Thanks," I sigh. "But tell me more, why did you kiss her?"

"Actually, I think she kissed me. And I don't know why it happened really, it just did. Amabel had broken up with Harry and I was there to comfort her, I guess one thing lead to another and before either of us knew it we were making out."

"Oh my God," I gape. "That's crazy. Nothing else happened right?"

"No, don't worry. We stopped it, it was only a kiss. We told Harry and he forgave her, they weren't together...it's a long story. If you want all the details ask Amabel. Or Parker, I'm sure she knows as well." Zayn chuckles.

I smile slightly. "Thanks for telling me, Zayn. I think it's pretty cool that you're telling me all this."

"I'll admit, it's not my favorite topic of conversation but it's something I think you should know."

"Is there anything else?" I tease.

"No, that's pretty much the gossip up until this point," he laughs, his tongue showing behind his teeth. It's so cute.

To get away from all the seriousness of the conversation, Zayn tells me stories about the rest of the boys and I find myself wiping my eyes from the laughter. Zayn is a really amazing person; you could sit down and talk with him for hours and not get bored. It seems much shorter than forty-five minutes when everyone else comes into the room, but Louis, who must still be sleeping.

After a few minutes of discussing Cleveland with Harry and Zayn, Louis comes barging in. He takes me by my arm and drags me out of the room. I look back at Zayn and Harry and they give me confused looks, ones I return.

"Louis, what are you doing?" I demand.

"Come with me," is his reply and I frown as he pulls me into the back room and closes the sliding door.

I cross my arms and face him. "What is your problem?"

Louis looks at me with a pleading expression. "Please don't make me say it," he almost whines.

My eyes widen. I'm baffled. "Say what?"

Louis walks towards me and I back up until I can't go any further. His head dips down and his hands press against the wall on either side of me. "I don't want you alone with Zayn."

I can't help but laugh out loud. "We weren't alone," I say.

"Before you were."

"How do you know that?" I ask.

"I heard you. I couldn't sleep." He says softly, not meeting my eyes.

"Oh," I reply. "Are you jealous or something?"

Louis' blue eyes meet mine. There is a ten-second pause before he says, "I don't know."

I sigh, I know he's lying. Why can't he just admit it? I make a move to walk away but Louis steps closer, trapping me. "No...don't go."

I sigh again. "Why not? If you can't tell me what you're thinking...how you feel, then I can't help you, Louis. I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too. I just....I don't know what I'm doing. Just please...stay here with me?" His lips are dangerously close to mine and I can practically feel my insides melt at his words. As angering as he is, I still love him no matter what and so I will stay.

"Alright," I breathe, and Louis' lips are on mine.

The kiss is gentle and hardly there, I can barley feel his lips on mine. He pulls away and then takes my hand, sitting down on the bed that is the room. It's small, but it'll work for us. "What did you want to talk about?" I ask him.


My head is spinning as I take a seat next to him. This whole in between thing is so exhausting. He keeps kissing me-not that I'm complaining-but he can't tell me how he feels. Actions speak louder than words. Louis' actions are telling me that he wants to be with me but I need to hear him say it, I need to hear him say that he needs me. If he doesn't then I will continue to be led on by him, and if he decides he doesn't love me, then I'll feel like an idiot for sticking around. I won't be there for him to kiss but not to commit to.

He seems so young right now, quite and unsure about every move he makes. I'm glad he's turning to me and hopefully this can be the start of something. My heart flutters and I grip his hand tighter. I know we have a lot to talk about, Zayn being one of them. How can he think that I am into Zayn? Every sign I have given him says the opposite of that, actually. But because Louis is Louis, I sit there with him and talk about things that will make him smile, whatever those things may be.


I'm sorry this chapter is so short!

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