Where Did I Go Wrong

the "Inspired By A Song" competition. My story was inspired by the song "How To Save A Life" by The Fray. My story is about a girl (Dawn) struggling to fight depression and her best friend (Caelan) who is trying his hardest to understand her and help her through it. Life is full of ups and downs, some people experience it more than others. But that is why we have to find a way to get through it.
“By letting it go, it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try, the world is beyond winning.” -Lao Tzu


3. Don't Slip

Caelan made me promise that I would stop cutting. It has definitely been the hardest thing that I have ever done in my life. I've gone 5 days without cutting, and I think I'm about to go mad.  Basically all day I sit in my bed and listen to music, thinking up ways to kill myself. I don't go to school anymore, I can't focus. I can barely pull myself out of bed to eat. Actually, I haven't eaten in 3 days... Caelan still goes to school. And his parents work from early morning until dusk. So I usually wonder the house all day until Caelan gets home. I can't throw away the razors. Something tells me I shouldn't. Something tells me I need them. I hope that something is right because I can't control myself forever. 

Minutes turn to hours, and Caelan isn't home yet. He's probably staying late after school like he always does. That box of razors are more tempting then ever right now. It's almost like I crave it. It's become an addiction to me. I can't hold back anymore. I have to do it now or else I'll go insane. I go into the bathroom, not even bothering to lock the door considering I am the only one home, lean my back against the door, and sink down to sit on the bathroom tile. I open the cabinet under the sink, and push back some toilet paper, half-empty bottles of soap, and pull out a small box with a sparrow on it. But don't let looks deceive you, because inside, there are 24 individual razor blades, each spotted with my own blood. The sight makes me wince. I set the box down, close my eyes, and take a deep breath. I don't know why it's so hard for me to do it, maybe because I promised my best friend that I wouldn't do it. 

But finally, I get myself together. It's okay Dawn, don't be afraid. You're just anxious, and this is your escape. It's not wrong. So finally, I grab a razor and hold it to my wrist. Tears start to rush down my cheeks as the blood rushes out of the cuts. And as the blood flows out, so do my negative thoughts. But right as I was about to cut a fourth line, the doorknob rattles and turns. 

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