Back For You (Harry Styles)

{BOOK 1- COMPLETE} Meet Amabel Walker, the girl who kept everyone else out, who put up walls to protect herself from another accident, like the one that caused her hideous scar on her neck. She’s bitter and doesn’t let anyone in, but that soon changes.

Now, meet Harry Styles. Worldwide boy band hottie. Slighly cocky, but charming and sweet when he needs to be. He’s caring, and wants to help Amabel get back to being her normal, carefree, silly and loving self. Can he get under her skin and make her come out of her dark shell?



42. Chapter 42

Chapter 42

I guess Louis took me upstairs to my bed after I fell asleep on his chest, because when I woke, it was 9a.m. Memories of how Louis came to my door at 2:30 in the morning clouded my mind. He told me that everyone makes mistakes. Harry knew that not telling me that Brittany kissed him was wrong, and he apologized a lot. He never stopped calling me, but I couldn’t bring myself to answer it. I knew all this waiting around was driving him insane; it was driving me insane as well.

I took a shower, got dressed, and as soon as I was stuffing my phone in my pocket and walking downstairs, there was a knock on the door. When I opened it, Niall was there. “Hey!”

“Hi Niall. How’s it going?” I stepped out and locked the door behind me.

“Great. I would have brought Sam along, but she’s out running some errands for today.”

“Oh, that’s okay. We need some time to catch up, anyways. What brings you here?” We started walking along the sidewalk. I loved how there was always a little hint of pink in Niall’s cheeks. It gave him a little kid look.

“No reason. I needed someone to talk to, and the lads are driving me insane. Zayn’s been locked in his room and Harry’s—”

I froze. Niall stopped talking and blushed. I cleared my throat. “Zayn’s been in his room? Why?”

“Word gets around….” He knew. He knew what happened with Harry and that Zayn and I kissed. I groaned.

“Did Louis tell you?” I took his silence as a yes. “What’s wrong with me?” I asked as we rounded a corner.

“Nothing. I just think you’re in love with Harry. And Zayn was there and….”

I took a deep breath through my nose and tried to calm down. “I miss him. I can’t believe we’re over.”

“But you’re not. You both want to get back to each other, so what’s stopping you? Harry made a mistake, but you love him so much, I know you’ll move past it. The bond between you two is too strong.”

My eyes widened. “What’s with everyone being so…down to earth lately? Last night Louis came over and he gave me some great advice. Even though he read it online, it’s still advice. Now you!”

He shrugged. “I guess we’re just that brilliant.”

We kept walking until we walked inside a small café, where we sat down and talked some more. It was small talk. He told me about what life was like on the X-Factor, all those years ago. I had never heard this story from his point of view, and I noticed that all the boys told the story differently. The way he told the story made me know just how much he loved it.

“When we got third place, yeah, we were upset. But at the same time we knew great things were coming our way. Simon helped us a lot with that.” He said. I nodded, and just as I was about to speak, Niall’s phone rang. He grinned and answered it. “Hey, Ed!”

My jaw dropped. Ed? As in Ed SheeranThe Ed Sheeran? Niall saw my expression and laughed. Ed was my favorite singer. Like…ever.

“You want to talk to him?” Niall asked me. I nodded, at a loss for words. “Hey Ed, I have Harry’s girlfriend Amabel with me, and she really wants to talk to you.” He paused as Ed spoke, then handed me the phone. I took it with a shaking hand.


“Hi, Amabel, it’s Ed.”

I nearly fainted. I leaned back in my chair and tried not to scream. “Hi, I’m a big fan. You’re absolutely amazing. For real, I have your album on my iPhone on loop.”

Ed laughed. “Thanks, love.”

I really wish I hadn’t said that. Now my idol thinks I’m a total weirdo. “You’re welcome. I’m sorry to bother you I just heard Niall say your name, and I j-just...”

“It’s alright. It’s really no problem. I’m just on my way to a show, now.”

“Really? Good luck, I’m sure you’ll do amazing.”

“Thank you. May I speak to Niall again please? We’ve got something going on for their next single.”

“Of course!” I said. “It was great to talk to you.”

“You too, love. We’ll have to meet in person some time.”

I grinned and handed the phone to Niall and mouthed him a thank you so much before going back to drinking my coffee. That was unbelievable! I just talked on the phone with Ed fucking Sheeran! He’s my favorite singer-songwriter. My favorite song of his is by far is ‘Kiss Me.’

“Well,” Niall said when he hung up, “Want to come to my place and watch a movie or somethin’?”

I smiled. “Sure, sounds great.”

We paid and left, driving the short distance to Niall’s apartment. When we opened the door, the two of us saw Liam, Zayn and Louis on the couch watching reruns of The Bachelor. “You guys really have stooped that low, hu?” I laughed.

“It’s entertaining!” Zayn protested.

I raised an eyebrow. “Is that so?”

“Come on! What the hell is wrong with you, Sean!? Desiree is so much better for you than Katherine! Fucking idiot!” Louis shouted. I laughed.

“What the hell? No! Katherine and Sean have so much potential! Desiree is an annoying little girl! Why would he give her the rose at the ceremony?” Zayn said.

“Because they’re soul mates! Look at Desiree, she’s in tears! Ugh!” Louis shot back.

I shook my head and went to the kitchen to get some water. These boys were a piece of work. My head shot up. Was Harry here?

“Harry’s not here, in case you were wondering.” Someone said behind me. When I looked, I was met by a pair of soft brown eyes.

“Thanks, Liam. You read my mind.” I sighed.

“He isn’t leaving his apartment. I can tell he’s miserable.” Liam had a worried look in his eye.

“I should talk to him. It’s killing me.” I said.

He nodded. “He loves you so much.”

“I love him, too.” I meant those words. After all we had been through it wasn’t worth giving up for one mess up. He was the one for me, and I knew it better than anyone else. “When should I talk to him?”

Right after I said that, there was a knock on the door. Someone—I don’t know who—answered it. Niall came around the corner and whispered frantically, “It’s Harry.” My stomach clenched. “Should I invite him inside?”

“Of course, don’t be ridiculous.” I said nervously as my palms became sweaty. Liam gave me a one-shoulder hug then led me to the couch, where everyone else was sitting.

I felt Harry’s eyes bore into me as I sat down between Louis and Zayn. I avoided his eye contact and tried to pay attention to The Bachelor, but Sean and who-ever-the-girl’s name was were kissing and it made me think of Harry, back when we used to do that. The fact that he was staring at me wasn’t helping. When I stole a glance in his direction, our eyes met and I flashed him a shy smile, his eyes showing me pain and regret. I bit my bottom lip so I didn’t cry, and turned away. We needed to talk.

I got up and walked to the kitchen, and I knew Harry was following me. “Can we talk?” He said.

When I turned around and looked at him more closely, I saw that his eyes were rimmed with red and were puffy, signs that he had been crying. “Yeah. Talk.”

“Not now,” he said, and peeked around the corner to make sure no one was listening. “Can we meet tomorrow? I miss you.”

I put a hand on my hip. “What time?”

“7, your place?”

I nodded. “Fine.”

Harry stared me longingly for a second or two before stepping closer so there was an inch between us. “I love you. I’m so sorry.” His hand grazed my cheek. It felt like a million little butterflies fluttering against my skin, and I told myself not to lean into his touch. It would have to wait until tomorrow.

“Yeah,” I said, and brushed past him, taking my place on the couch again. Louis gave me a look, one that said ‘Is everything okay?’, and I nodded silently. We would talk about this later. Not here.


The next day, I paced in my room for a good two hours. I kept looking at the clock every thirty seconds, and every time I did, time seemed to be passing by slower and slower.

To calm myself down, I put my iPhone on my dock and blasted music. First playing was “Clarity” by Zedd featuring Foxes. This song was amazing, and it related to Harry and I. Tears threatened to flow down my cheeks as I sang along at the top of my lungs.


I dive into frozen waves where the past comes back to life

Fight fear for the selfish pain it was worth it every time

Hold still right before we crash, ‘cause we both know how this ends

A clock ticks 'till it breaks your glass and I drown in you again

Cause you are the piece of me, I wish I didn’t need

Chasing relentlessly, still fight and I don’t know why

If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?

If our love’s insanity, why are you my clarity?
If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?

If our love’s insanity, why are you my clarity?

Walk on through a red parade, and refuse to make amends

It cuts deep through our ground and makes us forget all common sense

Don’t speak as I try to leave, ‘cause we both know what we'll choose

If you pull, then I’ll push too deep and I’ll fall right back to you

Cause you are the piece of me, I wish I didn’t need

Chasing relentlessly, still fight and I don’t know why

If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?

If our love’s insanity, why are you my clarity?


As the song “The Big Bang” started playing, there was a knock on my door. When I checked the time, it was 6:30. Panic began to build up inside me. Was it Harry? Why was he early? What was he doing here? Slowly, I walked downstairs and when I opened the door, I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw Zayn standing there.

“Hey,” he said, “we need to talk.”

“About what?” I asked, and opened the door. He stepped inside and walked into the family room where we sat down on the couch. “Harry’s going to be here soon, and—”

“We need to tell him about the kiss, Amabel.”

I froze. “Why?”

“Because the last thing you need right now is a lie. You said that yourself, right? I know he’ll understand; he loves you too much to lose you over something so stupid.”

I sat down next to him. “Okay,” I sighed. “I hope you’re right…but what if he doesn’t understand?”

Zayn rolled his eyes. “He will.”

I furrowed my eyebrows. “You don’t know that.”

“I know my best friend, and I know he loves you, and by the way you talk about him, I know you love him back. How could you not? You guys have been together for what…a year?”

I pursed my lips. Why did everything have to be so complicated? Just as I was about to reply, a voice came from the doorway. “What’s going on?”

My head snapped up and I saw Harry, looking back and forth between Zayn and I. “Um…”

“We have something to tell you.” Zayn spoke up, standing.

“Okay….” Harry said, obviously confused. He sat where Zayn was and I stood up. I couldn’t sit down next to him, knowing that I was going to tell him I kissed his best friend. Hurt flashed across his eyes when I moved away from him. I shut my eyes tight and tried to breathe normally.

I spoke first. “The other night, when…things went down between us, Zayn came over and comforted me. I was angry and upset and really confused so…”—this is it—“I kissed him.”

“We both know it was a mistake and I don’t like her like that, so you have nothing to worry about, mate. It was stupid and I don’t know what the hell I was thinking. I’m really sorry.” Zayn said quickly.

“Me too,” I whispered. I cringed, and waited for Harry to explode.

But he didn’t. In fact, he didn’t say a word for a full five minutes. His face showed absolutely no expression whatsoever. He just stared at the wall in front of him. Zayn and I exchanged a worried glance.

“Harrry?” I asked, sitting down next to him. “Harry?”

“I um, I think I should go.” Zayn said. “I’ll see ya later, Am. Sorry.”

“Thanks Zayn.” I half-smiled and then turned to Harry, who still showed no reaction. Was he mad? Was he sad? Was he never going to speak to me again?

I kneel in front of the curly-haired boy and took his hands in mine, bowing my head. Did he hate me? Suddenly, his head snapped in my direction, his eyes boring into mine. I waited for him to say something —anything— for a long time. When I thought he was never going to respond, he spoke. 

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