His wide arm scared me, they scared me more than life itself, at least for that moment they did.


2. Chapter One- A Bully

   I am a bully.  I don't exactly know how it happened, it just did.  I can't stop it now.   I walk down the hallway, scanning the lockers for my next victim.  Too lazy to get in a fight, I pick an easy target.  Ethan McCowan.  Five foot one and skinny, not at all athletic and proud honor roll student.  I slam him against his locker, like they do in the movies.  A terrible expression creeps onto his face. 

   "Please..."  He says.

   "Aw, boys, he learned his manners."  I say, Tom and Jake, my two bud's, snicker.  "Listen kid, if I were you I'd delete your Facebook profile, by seven, tonight."  I told him.  He gives me a terrified look, and I leave. 


   I walk down the paved streets, directed to my mothers house.  The buildings grew smaller and scarier as the walk progresses.  I didn't even notice this a couple years ago, but know I do, it makes my stomach twist.  Should I really do this to him, I hope he does delete his profile, he's a nice kid. I tell myself.  I shouldn't think that, because I am the bully.  I always bully, but every time I do, I grow a little colder and guilt myself a little more.

   I reach my house.  My plasticky, ugly, sketchy house.  With shrubs growing wildly, blocking the light from the windows, and coke bottles scattered on the ground.  I sigh, knowing exactly what to expect inside.


  Mom's always out, dad's always dead and god knows were John ever is.  I sit down on what's left of our couch, and get out my laptop from under the chair beside me.  


   I check to see if his profile is still there.  It is.  It still says 'Ethan McCowan'  it still has all those conversations with other members of the school Tech Club and all his nerd medals are listed.

  I get up, and grab an apple, and some peanut butter.


  I check his profile.  'Ethan McCowan'  That was him, his tech club and nerd medal.  All there.

  "James darling!  I'm home!"  My mom shouts.  Thank god she's home before John today.  My mom's always meant the best for me and my brother John, it's too bad we're both so terrible.

  "In the living room, mom!"  I shouted back.  She walks in, with her waitress uniform.  She smiles, I frown.  "You kay-kay?"  She asks. I smile.

   "I'm kay-kay."  I lie.


   The profiles still there.  By fact, it was still there at 6:46 and 6:47.  It was still there at 6:56 and 57.  

Two more minute until deadline

  I cross my fingers for a miracle, but there isn't one, which leaves me no choice.  I pick up the computer and write words I wish can take back.  I write sentences that no one should ever hear in there entire life.  Every word is worse than the last.  But I still take my mouse and drag it to the send button.  I'm just about to press it, but, just then I realize something, I don't need to press that button.  I control what happens.

  So I don't.


  John slams through the door, "Got food?"  He shouts.

  "John.  Don't be rude."  My mom tells him, too politely, handing a plate of chicken fingers to him.

    "Umm, okay."  He replies with a dull expression on his face.  To think that last year this boy was on the honor roll, next to Ethan McCowan.  I guess that was before dad died, back when the house was beautiful and mom wasn't force to work long hours at that run down cafe.  How could Dad abandon us?

  My life is a mess.  Mom's life is a mess.  John's life is a mess.  I remember back when we were  the perfect Canadian family.  When I was kind and John showered, mom stayed home.  I guess that times passed.

  "What's up douche."  John asks me.  I close my eyes and throw my computer.  I am not a bully, I'm not ruining my life, for my mothers sake.  



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