The Utterly Hopeless life of Dylan Blue

Dylan Blue has had her fair share of being a nobody, when the summer holidays come she decides to make a popularity plan that will change her life for the better. But is being 'popular' really what it seems? read the book to find out!


1. why? why? why?!


Why does my life have to be so terribly unfortunate?!

Its the summer holidays at the moment, and I kinda’ thought id miraculously come up with a plan to somehow turn my life around.... or at least get a boob job (According to my mother, if I'm anything like her in the sense of growing, which so far I am, then I can expect their arrival in...Well to put it in simple terms, never.)

So until then I guess I'll just have to rely on padding and chicken fillets.


Anyway, you know one of those... high school miseries? Where there's always that one girl who absolutely no-one understands?? So much so that she barely ever opens her mouth to speak, or even to react, at the spiteful things that they (the kids at school) say?- I guess... despite the power she feels inside her, she just cant seem to put it, well... into action.

That girl is me.

OK maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration. For one thing, I do actually talk. Allot. According to my mum, it can get almost annoying, or to put in her words exasperating, when she can't shut me up. Although, personally I think that talking to my mum, about why she’s to chubby to fit into her way-to-skinny jeans, is a whole other thing completely compared to talking to on of the pampered minions, or even the queen bitch herself. That’s what we call her anyway - we being my friends, Tasmin and Joney - and Diana Darling being the one belonging to the queen bitch title. Its kind of ironic actually, that her name is Darling, because she is so far from it...  before I go into any specific details about her, the short of it is that she is probably the meanest, smartest, sickeningly gorgeous girl alive. In fact, describing her as a mean would be an understatement; she’s more like one of those killer red ants I saw on the discovery channel. They bite you first, as if to show you how tough they are. But more than likely the bite doesn’t kill you just like that, from what I’ve seen; it just gets even more painful by the seconded, slowly destroying your body until you finally just...drift away... Or something like that anyway. Truthfully, I wasn’t really paying much attention to the program, because my stupid nephew wouldn’t stop bugging me to play temple run on my new iPod. I mean seriously! Does he actually think I’m going to let him put his sticky skinny little fingers on my brand new iPod? Urgh! Kids eh?


As I was saying, Diana practically runs the school with the help of the pampered minions, them being three equally vicious girls. The one disadvantage they do have would be that everyone knows how stupid they are. Capable of frightening people and being down right rude, but not having a brain of their own, making it especially easy to follow Diana's orders.

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