Life through closed eyes

This is for the diary competition... I listened to
Good life by OneRepublic (class song) and
James Morrisions latest album whilst writing this... Hope you like it... So yeah... stay tuned :)


4. Day 4


Dear me:


Oh. My. God. I did it. I actually called him. 


After I got up at like, eleven, I wondered aimlessly around the house, trying to pluck up the courage to call him. I don’t know why I was so nervous, I mean he had told me to call him, and I wanted to find out what he meant by ‘You owe me.’ But every time I thought about our last encounter, his piercing green eyes, and his angry deep voice replayed in my mind, sending a wave of butterflies running through me. I admit, I think he’s pretty damn hot, but he probably thinks I’m a freak. Then again, I was in a hospital... People faint in hospitals all the time... Right?


Anyway, after about an hour of debating weather to pick up the phone (sad I know) I eventually did. I dialed in the number, and pressed it against my ear, listening to the beeps as it connected to the other end. 

“Hola.” That same husky  voice greeted. 

“Er, hi...” I replied. “...What exactly do I owe you?” I questioned, getting straight to the point.

I heard him give a small laugh before saying “Well well, so you finally called me. I was starting to think you hadn’t got my message mamacita.” He said, lacing spanish with english.

What was I meant to say to that?

“Um, yeah.” I mumbled in response. What the hell?! Say something witty! I thought.

“I have to admit chica I’m used to girls swooning over me, but no one has ever fainted on me before.” He said, his voice amused. Great. He was one of those cocky guys. The sort that knows their beautiful, and doesn’t try to hide it. I felt my face flush.

“Get over yourself.” I replied, still trying to think of something witty to say. “If anything you owe me an apology.”

Perdón? What exactly do I owe you an apology for?”

“For walking into me.” I said simply.

He laughed. “Actually I think you walked into me.”

“Thats not what happened, and you know it!” I snapped, there was something about this guy... He had the ability to get under my skin, just by saying the simplest things, and I didn’t like it.

“Ooh, I have to tell ya chica, I love a girl with attitude.”

“Ugh. Just tell me why I owe you.”

“I caught you baby.” He replied.

“What? Thats what I owe you for? Catching me? Thats ridiculous.”

Sí. Meet up with me, and we’ll call it quits.”

“What?” I asked, stunned. Confident much? Who was this guy? Catching someone when they faint isn’t a big thing, its a nice thing to do. Why would he want to meet up with me anyway? To make fun of me? Well whatever the reason, my answer is still no. No. No. No.

“Um... Okay... Why?”

“Do you know the park over on Berton road?”

“Yeah I know it, you didn’t answer my question.”

“Meet me there in an hour. Adios chica.” 

Wait you never-” I was cut off by the long beep coming from the other end. He’d hung up on me! I was so not going to meet up with him. I mean I had only met the guy once, and it was clear this guy was nothing but trouble. For all I know, he could be a kidnapper! Or a murderer! Plus Berton road was in a rough part of town, the streets covered in gang symbols, marking their territory. Hell I’d read about gun fights going down on Berton road, not exactly the ideal place for a park.


So diary, here I am once again, deciding weather to go or not. Maybe I’m over thinking this? He didn’t sound like a murderer or look like one... But what are they meant to sound like? In the movies they always had a really creepy voice, which was always either reaaally deep, or really high pitched...

Then again, I am dying anyway. Shouldn’t I live on the edge every once in a while? Okay so meeting a hot guy isn’t exactly what you might call ‘on the edge’, but who cares.


You know what diary? Im gonna go. Just for once in my life, i’m gonna do something with out thinking. Yeah... Well if I don’t come back, because he was in fact a murderer or kidnapper, I just want to say... 


YOLO! Hehehe.  


See ya later! Bye!


Oh shit.. 




Dear Me... I SURVIVED! 


Today was definitely eventful, thats for damn sure.


Turns out he isn’t a murderer or a kidnapper, and is even hotter the second time you see him. Omnom, dribble. 


Okay here’s what happened:


 After the rather quick conversation on the phone, I rushed to my wardrobe, yanking on a pair of turquoise skinny jeans, with a white tank top, and my black converse. I then walked over to my mirror to apply my make up. I didn’t usually wear much make up, as usually I didn’t go anywhere, and didn’t have anyone to impress but the doctors. So it was kind of nice to get a little dressed up. I applied a thin line of black eyeliner, a coat of mascara, and some light pink lip gloss. I was determined to look better then the last time we had met. 


Berton road was quite a drive from my house, so even if I hurried I was still going to be late. Which probably was a good thing I guess, fashionably late and all that shit. I gave my self a once, and then twice over, brushing my fingers through my wavy hair. 

“Mum!” I called out.

“Yes darling?” She yelled back.

“Do you recon you could drop me off on Green street?” I asked. Green street was right next to Berton road, and was mostly out of the firing range of rival gangs.

“Sure, why?” She replied, opening my bedroom door. She would probably have a heart attack if I told her I was meeting a guy on Berton road, so it was probably best to lie.

“Oh, I’m meeting some friends.” 

“Ok hunni, have you got your meds? And your cell phone? What time would you like me to pick you up?”

“Mum, quit worrying! Yes i’ve got my meds, yes i’ve got my phone.”

“Oh-” She started,

“And yes! I will call if I need you!” I cut her off. “Stop worrying mum, I’m fine!”

“I know you are hun, but you were in the hospital only yesterday! Hmm... Maybe it will be good for you to spend some time with your friends though.”

“Yeah I know, but I feel fine mum. Honest.”

“Okay, lets go then.”


I trailed behind her as we walked out to the car, all of a sudden feeling nervous. I hadn’t met up or spent any time with a guy since I was in school, well any hot guys. I shushed my nerves by telling myself, that my life is too short to spend it worrying.


When my mum pulled the car into the opening of Green street, my stomach was tumbling about inside me. No matter how many times I told myself it was fine, I couldn’t stop the butterflies. No guy had ever effected me like this before, especially one I had only met once! Shit, I didn’t even know the guys name! 

“Bye darling, have a nice time! Text me when you want me to pick you up!” Mum said, happy that I was making the effort to catch up with my friends. 

“Thanks, I will! Bye!” I replied, shutting my car door. As I watched her drive away, I suddenly had the urge to chase after her car, waving my arms above my head, yelling for her to come back. I shoved that thought away, and carried on walking down the road, till I got to the entrance of Berton road. You could definitely tell this wasn’t the richest area in town. The houses were about half the size of mine, and packed closely together, with graffiti and gang symbols decorating almost every wall and building. Talk about marking your territory. They might as well have just peed on everything, yelling this is Viper5 territory, be warned! I wandered down the deserted street, puling my grey zip up hoodie tighter around me. I could just see the park now, the small climbing frame and swings leaning wonkily to one side. 

Hola chica!” A voice called out from behind me. I spun round, expecting to see the same green eyes and cocky grin from the hospital. The guy who was now walking towards me, was only a couple of inches taller, with dark brown eyes, tanned skin, and a black bandanna, with a blue viper printed on it, covering his head. He was obviously part of the Viper5 gang. Oh hell.

So heres what I know about the Viper5, or the V5’s for short:

They’re known for being one of the toughest gangs around They rival with a gang called the SecretBlood or the ‘SB’ for short It was started by 5 people originally, they call themselves the OG’s (original gangsters), and are basically in charge. You can usually identify them from their tattoos, which is a viper coiled around the number 5, the same thing printed on the bandanna.  Their f-ing scary! And one of them was walking towards me right now!


They guy was dressed in baggy grey trackies, with a black t-shirt. On his arm was the v5 tattoo, the blue ink standing out against his tanned skin. I ducked my head down and kept walking, speeding up towards the park. This had been a stupid idea! I may be dying, but I planned on prolonging my life for as long as possible, well at least until I was ready.

“Yo chica! Where you runnin’ too?” He yelled, his voice sounding uncomfortably close. Oh my God. After a couple more seconds of speed walking, I felt his presence as he walked close behind me. “You runnin’ from me baby? Don’t worry, I’m not gonna hurt you.” He whispered in my ear. I spun around to face him, trying to look unfazed.

“Piss off.” I said, looking him straight in the eye. This guy wasn’t exactly ugly, with his strong jaw line and thick lips, he was actually quite hot. But the look in his eye told me this guy was dangerous, and had probably been recruited into the V5 for a reason. 

He let out a slow whistle, giving me the once over.

 “Whats the matter? Don’t like what you see?” He winked.

“As I said, piss off.” I huffed, my knees wobbling. From what I had seen in movies, you shouldn’t let them know how scared you are, sort of like animals.

“Ouch!” He said, holding a hand to his heart.

I rolled my eyes, about to turn away from him, when he dropped his hand and took another step to wards me. He was right up in my grill now, looking down at me. “Your in my part of town now baby, and -”

“Yo Havier!” A familiar voice hollered, cutting him off. I rush of relief flooded me, as the guy from the hospital appeared from behind me. Shouldn’t he be in shiny silver armor or something? 

“Wassup’ Garcia.” He greeted nodding in his direction.

I took a small step away from the guy named Havier, hoping no one would notice if I sprinted back the way I had come. My heart was still beating rapidly, my knees threatening to give way.

“What you doin’ gettin’ all up in my girls face?” I almost protested at this, but decided to keep my mouth shut, taking another small step away.

Tu chava?”


“Sorry mate, just havin’ a little fun. Anyway I’m outta here.”

Adios.”  He said, punching his fist against Havier’s. I was in the middle of deciding weather to just stay cool, or make some excuse and bolt home, when ‘hospital guy’ turned to face me.

“Sorry about him, are you okay?” He asked. For the first time I got to look at him since he arrived. He was in dark denim jeans and a white t-shirt, showing off his muscular arms and- Omg- His V5 tattoo. 

“Um yeah I’m fine... Why did you call me ‘your girl’? I don’t even know your name.” I asked, feeling a little wary of this gang member. He was still as gorgeous as the last time I had seen him, his stitches still in place above his eyebrow making him look tough. 

“Yeah sorry about that, Havier is a bit... forward. You held your own though, you’re one sexy mamacita when you act tough.” He said, causing my cheeks to heat up. “And I’m Luca, nice to meet you.” He winked. “And your name would be?” 

“Er...Allina, Alli for short.” I replied, ignoring his comment about me acting tough. “Why did you want to meet up with me?” Ok, so I wasn’t very subtle, but I was waaaay out of my comfort zone right now. On a street known for gang violence, with a gang member, by myself. I am in way over my head here!

“What is this twenty questions? Come on.” He laughed, walking towards the park. We walked for a couple of minutes in awkward silence, before I said 

“So where are going?”

He laughed again as he opened the park gate. “The park.”

Well duh! Im such an idiot. I could feel the heat spreading across my cheeks. “Right...” I mumbled, thinking of something to say to change the subject. “So how come you were in Hospital the other day?” 

“I kind of fell on a knife.” He laughed, “Face first.”

I knew he was lying, he probably was in a knife fight, wouldn’t surprise me. He seemed to sense that I didn’t believe him “This isn’t the nicest part of town.” He added, taking a seat on one of the swings. I followed, perching on the one next to him.

“Mmm...” I was debating weather or not to ask him about the V5, when he said,

“What about you?”

“Um...” I knew if I told him I was in hospital for cancer, this situation could either go two ways. He could do what most people did, and give me a pitying look and say “oh that sucks, i’m sorry.” And then be overly nice to me. Or, he could give me a look of disgust and leave. He didn’t strike me as the type to give a pitying look, so I said “I was ill... But its fine now.” Was technically true... I was just EXTRA ill that day.

“Cool. So you ever been to Berton before?”

“Um, no not really.”

“Let me guess, you’ve read about it in the paper or shit like that?”

“Er, yeah.” 

“You seem nervous chica.

Thats because I am nervous! “Nah, I’m cool. So do you live around here?”

Sì. Just down the road, why you wanna check it out?” He winked at me, getting to his feet and standing in front of my swing. He was playing with me. Well, two could play at this game.

I got to my feet so I was only a couple of inches away from him. “Am I that obvious?” I whispered, running my tongue along my top lip suggestively. 

He seemed a bit stunned for a moment, but quickly recovered, plastering a big cocky grin on his face. “Haha, you’re good. Most girls would have blushed and giggled at that.”

“Well” I shrugged “I’m not most girls.”


For the next half hour, conversation just sort of flowed as if we had known each other for ages. I stayed clear of bringing up the V5, instead talking to him about music. We had a huge debate at what Bob Marley song was better: I said it was ‘Buffalo Soldier’ and he thought it was ‘Could You Be Loved’. He said that his favorite type of music was wrap, but that he loved traditional spanish music as thats where he was from. 

“So, how come you came to England? Surely it would be great living in Spain?” I asked.If I had grown up in Spain, I wouldn’t leave to come England. 

“Long story short, mi mama wanted a fresh start. We hadn’t really had it easy in Spain, so we moved here.” He gestured to the cluster of houses surrounding us, a slight smile tilting up the corners of his mouth. Damn this guy was hot with a capital H. 

“Do you think you’ll ever go back?”

“When I save up enough money, I-” He was cut off my the music that began to blare out of my phone. I slid it out of my back pocket, my mums name flashing brightly on the screen.

“Sorry, I should take this.” I said, walking away from the swings. “Hey mum whats up?” I greeted.

“Alli is it ok if I pick you up, the doctors want to see you.”

“What why?”

“Just about the possibility of starting chemo next week.”

“Oh, okay.” I sighed, a feeling of dread spreading through me.

“I’ll be there in twenty minutes.”

“Okay, bye.” I said, pressing the end button.


I turned back around, watching Luca as he swung peacefully on the swings. I can’t believe I had been scared of him. Sure he’s probably in a gang, one of the toughest around, but underneath his hot, tough exterior he’s a really nice guy. Cocky and slightly arrogant, but still nice. Oh and did I mention he’s hot? Really hot?

I walked over slowly, really wishing I didn’t have to leave. “Im sorry, I’ve got to go.”

“Oh okay, how come?”

For some reason I didn’t want to lie to him, so I stayed close to the truth. “Im going to the doctors for another check up.”

“Okay, dya want a ride home?”

“A ride? On what exactly?”

He stood, one of his cocky grins appearing, “Just you wait and see.” He said, leading me out of the park. I quickly sent my mum a text saying that I was getting a lift home.


We walked down the road, passing house after house. On almost ever wall or door was the mark ‘V5’ claiming it as theirs. When we finally stopped, we were stood in front of a tiny house, probably only quarter the size of mine, it had a small patch of grass out the front, which was scattered with little plastic trucks.

“Yours?” I asked, nodding towards the toys.

“Nope, my little brothers.”

“How many brothers do you have?”

“Four. One older and two younger.” He shrugged, as he walked towards a shiny black motorcycle. I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Whats funny?” He asked, smiling at me.

“Haha nothing, its just so cliche! Bad boy, in a rough area, big motorcycle.” I laughed again.

“You think I’m a bad boy?” He asked, amused as he leaned against the bike. 

I flushed pink, “You tell me, are you a bad boy?” Hmm... I wasn’t so bad at this flirting thing.

He laughed “Hop on, and I’ll guess you’ll find out.” He replied, swinging his leg over the motorcycle, and kick starting it into gear.

I had never been on a motorcycle before, my parents had told me they were death traps... Oh well.

I hopped on behind him, keeping a few inches of space between us, and holding onto his t-shirt. When the bike started moving I gave up on keeping the space, letting out a small squeal and wrapping my arms around his waist. Shit this was fast. I pressed my face into the back of his shoulder, shielding myself from the wind.


We whizzed down the road, going so fast I thought I was going to fly off the back. When we got past Green street, he slowed the bike down, a gentle purr vibrating from the engine. “Why’ve we stopped?” I asked, looking around.

He smiled, “It may help if I knew where we were going.”

What? How was I supposed to know where we were going? What does he want me to do, ask him out again. No way, thats the boys job.

“Huh?” I asked blankly, trying to think of a way to answer this.

His smile turned into a grin “Where do you live?” He corrected.

Oh. Omg I’m such an idiot.

“Oh right, um down Park stone road.”

“Okay. Cheers.” He turned back around, revving the engine before speeding off again.

I wrapped my arms around him once more, slipping forward in the seat so my body ended up pressed against him. I tried to wriggle backwards a bit, but gave up when I just slid back down again.


When we pulled into park stone road, we slowed down, passing by each house. I had never realized how big they were until I saw the houses on Berton road.

“Just here on the left, just stop at the end of the drive.” I didn’t want my ‘rentals to know I had been on a motorbike, they would flip!

“Okay.” He replied, bringing the bike to a halt at the bottom of my driveway. I (not so gracefully) swung my leg off the back of the bike, coming to stand by his side.

“Well thanks for the ride, I had fun today.”

“Me too, we should do it again sometime.” He winked, his words tinted with a spanish accent.

“Sure, how about tomorrow, meet me here at 12 o’clock.” I suggested, winking back.

“Sure thing mamacita.” 

I turned on my heel, walking back up to the house, making sure I put a little ‘swag’ into my hips.

Once I reached the door, I heard the bikes engine roar to life, as he sped away.


So diary, that was my day. I’ll talk about the hospital part in a minute, but right now I can’t stop thinking about Luca! 

Things I now know about Luca:

He is so damn hot. He thinks the song ‘Could You Be Loved’ is better than ‘Buffalo Soldier’. (Puh-lease) He looks like one dangerous gang member. I feel safe when I’m with him. Crazy but true. He makes me laugh... And blush (a lot.) And, he makes me forget that i’m dying.


Okay, onto the boring stuff. Basically, today the doctors said that they would like to start chemo next week, so it would give me time to prepare and gain my strength. They said it was highly likely that I would lose my hair, so bald alien here I come.


Er, what else...


Oh yeah, my mum cried. No surprise there, and it wasn’t even as if they were telling us anything bad.


I think thats about it... If I remember anything else, i’ll write it down later. 


So BYE! (Omg LucaLucaLuca.) 

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