Diary of a Daydreamer

Psychological Thriller, Take a journey throught the eyes of an addict who quickly delves deeper into the interwoven realms of reality and fiction. Dark Humour.

Some editing still required.


8. Dead Memories

I awaken to birds singing as the sunlight warms my face. It’s my day off so there’s no need to go to work. I rise out of bed and make my way downstairs stroking the banister I once slid down as a child. The delicious smell of a fry-up drifts up to me, enticing me down the stairs towards the kitchen. The door’s slightly ajar with a bright light glowing, pulling me in. An angelic voice begins to sing, a voice that I know so well. My hand begins to tremble as I move to open the door. As I open it slowly, my eyes get blinded by a breath-taking figure. There she stands. Anya. My beautiful Anya.  It’s been so long since I’ve been able to say her name out of joy. I walk towards her, my fiancé standing in front of me. She stands there as stunning as ever. Exactly the same perfect image as the last time I saw her, that day we went to the park, that day she went away.


I blink for a second and find myself sitting outside on a blanket. The sun shining bright and a picnic basket packed with our favourite food sitting unopened beside Anya. It wouldn’t matter if the sky opens up, as long as she is by my side. My hand begins to move without my instruction, up to her face, it brushes her hair away from her delicate skin. Her eyes are revealed, only this time my mind knows the future but my body does not. No control of my body, my hand continues to slide her hair behind her ear. I cannot move my lips to warn her of what is to happen next. She sits there blissfully unaware of her fate. I want to scream and shout, but no words can be spoken, I want to move her or hold her, but I am paralyzed to change the future. I am powerless to save her. My beautiful Anya.


No! This will not happen; I muster all my might and lunge forward as I move her from our unwanted fate. I grab her hand and run with her across the grass, sprinting as fast as our legs will take us. I must carry on running as fate is chasing us; attempting to destroy us. I just have to make it home. If we can just get back to our house, we can continue the path that we once planned together. Live the rest of our lives in each other’s arms. Is it possible to cheat fate?


As we run deeper into the city, closer to the house, I begin to wonder if Anya is still with me. I hear her running steps just behind me and I feel her hand embraced with mine, but could this be a trick, some cruel joke. Can my life truly be happy? My mind begins to doubt that Anya is behind me, it tells me that it’s all a lie and that she’s already been consumed by her destiny. I have to look; I have to see if it’s still her footsteps that I hear. As I turn my head I see the face I so desperately desired. It’s her. My beautiful fiancé gleefully smiling back at me; but her expression begins to change to that of despair, gazing into my eyes then looking past me, worried about where my legs are taking me. My foot gets caught on the edge of the pavement; it twists as I fall forward. Anya’s hand slips from mine as gravity drags me to the earth below and away from my love. My face slams into the ground. Darkness ensues. My fiancé is gone once more.


I awake in a sweat, almost in tears desperately wishing I could go back to the beginning. I wanted to hold her, to care for her, to love her.

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