You are not alone.

I want to turn the world around.
I want to make a difference.
Did you know that there are roughly seven billion people in this world, the planet Earth? Everybody is trying to live without living just for the sake of living.
Whether it's the sweet smell of her neck, the satisfying ring of the cash register, the stranger on the 907 bus who smiles at you from time to time or even the ploppety plop of a broken tap. You live for it. What's the point of going on otherwise?
Go a step further. Do you have something you'd die for? Do you really deserve to live if you don't have anything to die for?
Or are you out there wondering? Like a good 6.9999 billion others.. What am I here for?
Well, I want to light up the world.
Nothing more, and definitely nothing less.


2. Lime Jelly


I closed my eyes and tried to block out that annoying sound. You know when something is so annoying it takes everything in you to not throw a hissy fit and/or a punch. This was one of the rare times I wished I had a laptop or iPod, like Eliza, to block out that awful fizz. Like a tyre loosing air. And I thought the allotments were mine and the groundskeeper's secret.

"Pssssssst. You!"

There were only two people in the room. I wasn't blind or stupid. Sometimes you just think people'll get the message. Ignoring = Go away. 

I looked down half reading my pocket Bible. Then there was that brief moment of tension, where it went quiet, he'd either got the message and gone away or shut up, or...

"Hey there!"

He was right in front of me. Crooked teeth, slightly yellow; rosy cheeks, that would be appealing if he was a girl; bushy eyebrows that were verging on turning into a singular unibrow; brown eyes, as common as the rest of them but suprisingly, no uniform. Even more surprisingly, no laptop. Almost everyone in this institution pretends to be dyslexic so they can have a free laptop. Everyone could get away with it I suppose, and I guess taking advantage is human nature. 

I didn't know who he was. Didn't really care. I was just waiting for Eliza.

As usual.

I guess I could wait.

If it was Eliza.

He smiled sheepishly at me. "You do realize who I am, don't you?"

I paused for a second. Then I decided I didn't want to waste time, pondering, wondering, who he was. Guess this is the meaning of cba.

"I'm Mike! Michael Noah. Remember?"

I didn't, I didn't remember who he was, don't remember him ever being in my life.

And usually I remember. 

I remember an awful lot. 

"No. Sorry I don't" I ignored the look of pure shock on his face and carried on reading, slowly but surely, soaking in every word of my favourite verse.

My heart is in anguish within me;

the terrors of death have fallen on me. Fear and trembling have beset me; horror has overwhelmed me.

I'm not religious, I just like religious texts. They're quite entertaining to read and I do love a good Psalm or two. The Bible's probably one of the best books you can get around here. I'm not gonna be picky.

"You always liked reading the Bible."

"Why are you still here?" Wow. That sounded slightly rude. Even to my ears. I regathered myself and tried again " I don't remember you. Sorry. I'm waiting for someone, who can talk the whole roof down, and until she gets here I would appriciate some quiet."

He slowly nodded and looked at the empty patch of grass next to me. Oh gawd no.

"I would appriciate some quiet alone"

"Okay. I'll talk to you when you're in a better mood." He proceeded to sulk away, then abruptly stopped and turned around, "I brought you some lime jello!" His smile broke out suddenly, "I know you like to suck it, while you're reading."

He guffawed (the only word suitable to decribe such a disgusting sound) and threw a little pouch of lime jelly at me.

I really hate it when strangers are so mad that you don't remember them, that they violently attack you with lime jelly. It gets on my last nerve.

He was already too far away for me to give him a lecture, but I heard his parting words,

"You are not alone!! We'll do something great together!"

And it made me wonder.

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