Ten Songs Unsung And Other Poems

Written and inspired by Eme, this is my tribute a collection of complete and incomplete ramblings and poems, mostly inspired by her love.

Thank you for being you
Thank you always


14. Untitled

You have the answers all tucked in your head your bitter memories searching for clues I never lied to you I never would i know how you mind works a looking glass I peeked inside I saw your mind and breathed your world Yes I have friends even those I am close too I have people I turn too but only friends Yes I say things that maybe I shouldn't but the mask I wear keeps me from this this despair A heavy heart laden with guilt I promise you I never cheated those words disgust me I cannot digest them I lie here screaming for you too see look me in the eyes one last time look at my words one last time save me from dying one last time Sorry I don't have any strength to fight another day I sat here last night vodka in hand eight paracetamol and two sips what sort of attempt did I think I could do I sat for hours piece by fucking piece letting you in planning my escape into your arms I know you I knew you I wanted you I love you I only write like this because my mind works this way automatic words that come from my soul I know you think what you do and that hurts triggered by a disease I let it eat away at me I need to know there's hope I need to know there's us there cant be no other only you I cant have what I had with you this is it for me its only you always for you and a million words in a million years could not show you enough I think I am sick fallen to far a cage in my mind to keep me safe I let myself out I picked myself up to be there for you not its broken I fell to hard I have no escape Even Louisa has left remember how close we where she has gone given up Even Sarah does not speak its all my head the words so mocking I speak what do I do I need you

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