He woke up
Not knowing where he is. He will search this blinding light-
And he will find her again.


1. Waking up

Waking up in that ever-blinding light was more than enough to him.  Feeling completely disoriented and confused as he stood there, not knowing which way was left or right, up or down. Every way he looked light and whiteness forever going on, as far as he could see. Where was he? He traced back his steps, and he was almost a hundred percent sure that the last thing he did, was to go to bed. But now he stood here: fully dressed, the jacket hanging loosely to cover his arms, and his hair styled in the usual spikes. He drove a finger hard against his skin right under his right eye, looked at his finger, and he could confirm that he was wearing his dark eyeliner. Now he just didn’t know if he smudged it or not, and he really didn’t care, because nobody would see him here, and actually he just didn’t care about anything right now.

  He had a lot of questions though: How did he end up here? For how long had he been standing there? He couldn’t remember, everything was a giant blur of pictures and memories. He watched faces, parties, friends, enemies, her. How long ago was it now? He brushed his fingers through his hair, looking in every possible direction, and only seeing shimmer. He ignored the pain that he felt, and exchanged it with anger, He couldn’t just stand there! This was stupid, and probably just another of his messed up dreams that became nightmares- those terrors he’d met each night for so long. He really hadn’t really been able to sleep after the incident 3 years ago, and it was toring him apart. He brushed a fingertip against the scarred skin on his right wrist, only feeling more sorrow and loss; Only feeling more pain, only feeling more empty.

 Clenching and unclenching his fists, he started to walk forward into the light that looked like it would continue into forever. His mind wandered as he listened to the sound of his footsteps. A messed up mixture of thoughts and memories, good and bad, roamed through his mind, reminding him of things that only made him feel hollow and more psychotic. Nobody knew how bad he really felt. Nobody knew how it felt to have your soul torn out, to have your life turned upside down in one night.

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