Member since 16 Oct 11Last online 5 years ago

  • Napalm Carton
    With each forced step, I increase the bore
    Of this last-minuite, disorganised, dress-finding chore
    Face wind-bitten, hair a mess
    But all that I care for is finding the dress

    Dive in the first store, but nothing quite fits
    Each one too small for my double-d ****
    On to Prom Paradise, that lothesome place
    I run from the frills of satin and lace

    Store number two; a princess' grotto
    But beauty's skin deep is my personal motto
    So again I flee from pink, beige and plain
    If I don't find one soon ill go insane

    Shop number seven, head sore, feet red
    Why did that geek ask me? I could be home in bed!
    None in here fit; still too smalll
    What will I wear to this stupid ball?

    I'm feeling fat now, feeling depressed
    This three-hundred pound girl without a dress
    At the end of the road - a charity shop - ace!
    I'll give it a go before stuffing my face

    Walking in I feel something, I'm not sure what
    Possibly chaffing from my fat thighs so hot
    Next to a jumper, under a vent
    I see a black dress the size of a tent

    Made from silk, and lost teenage dreams
    My date will love it, but not the screams
    That come from the students fearing their life
    As from insdie it's hem, I pull out my knife!

    Oh yes,
    I've found the dress!
    The Dress
    The Dress
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    Many girls dream about their Prom, and the perfect dress. But how hard is into find the perfect one? For the conteset - comment, like and fave please!
  • Napalm Carton

    Critique

    If you'd like a crit, I'm happy to oblige. Take a very quick look at my book, Kaputt, it will give you an idea of whether or not you'd like feedback from me.

    Reciprocation is not necessary.
    quillfeather
    5 years ago
    I'd love feedback from you on my movella 'Legacy!'
  • Napalm Carton

    Critique

    If you'd like a crit, I'm happy to oblige. Take a very quick look at my book, Kaputt, it will give you an idea of whether or not you'd like feedback from me.

    Reciprocation is not necessary.
  • Napalm Carton

    Critique

    If you'd like a crit, I'm happy to oblige. Take a very quick look at my book, Kaputt, it will give you an idea of whether or not you'd like feedback from me.

    Reciprocation is not necessary.
  • Napalm Carton

    Critique

    If you'd like a crit, I'm happy to oblige. Take a very quick look at my book, Kaputt, it will give you an idea of whether or not you'd like feedback from me.

    Reciprocation is not necessary.
    Nova XWN
    5 years ago
    My Past Is Your Demise is the title of my movella and I'd love some critique
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